Tag Archive for healthcare

Phony Feckless Flake

We’ve commented many times before about Arizona’s junior Senator Jeff Flake. Why? Well, we live in Arizona for one thing and it’s our duty and right to comment about our government representatives. We also happen to think he has Mitt Romney-esque used car salesman abilities. He was for and against gun control. He claims to be a champion of the people, and yet continually votes in favor of corporate interests. He claims to be Mr. Bipartisan, but continually votes with along party lines with his Republican colleagues. If you’re looking for a hypocrite of the first order, look no further than Flake.

Flake made a big deal about not endorsing Donald Trump for President. Even now he’s come forward stating that Republicans need to stand up to him. Of course, in true salesman fashion, he’s also plugging his new book, which we will not provide a link to because we have no doubt it’s loaded with self serving bullshit. While stating how against Trump he is, he’s voted for most of Trump’s agenda 95% of the time, including his horrendous health care bill, which didn’t pass because Arizona’s senior Senator (in more ways than one) voted against it. Flake’s behavior is pretty much the actions of a feckless enabler.

To show you how much he’s in step with Trump, here’s a statement by orange haired rage monster’s about rolling back ‘job killing’ regulations for the polluting oil, gas and coal industries.

…We’re going to get real results when it comes to removing job-killing regulations and unleashing economic opportunity

Compare them to a blurb from Flake’s own newsletter that he mails out to Arizona constituents touting his great actions.

Arizona ratepayers and businesses shouldn’t be forced to shoulder the burden of EPA’s costly, convoluted regulations. By holding EPA accountable for its actions, we can keep our air clean without creating job-killing regulatory uncertainty.

Yes those nasty ‘job-killing regulations’, what an annoyance they are. Why not just get rid of all of them, then industry can dump their waste where ever they want and pollute the air just like China. But the point is made; Trump and Flake are on the same page, just like all the other Republicans. The GOP’s so called opposition to Trump is nothing but bullshit!

It’s no secret that Flake supports corporate America over average Americans. But he is also a big time corporate lackey, like most Republicans are, of the big polluting industries in this country. As a matter of fact, Flake has a career 9% lifetime score on the League of Conservation Voters Environmental Scorecard. So we ask Mr. Flake, what’s the point of repealing ‘job killing’ regulations if those said jobs end up killing people with the resultant pollution and poisonous wastes and by products?

Finally, Trump has launched attacks on Flake because of what he’s said about Trump in his book. Trump has announced support for nutty Teabagger patriot Kelli Ward (known by her moniker ‘Chemtrail Kelli’) in the upcoming 2018 senate race. But again, this is just political theater because Flake has sided with Trump 95% of the time like this article at FactCheck.org states. So now, not only is Flake being attacked by the Democrats, but the radical right wingers in his own party are attacking him as well.

So we implore Arizonans to send Mr. Flake back to his hometown of Snowflake, AZ, which is a truly appropriate place for this Republican to live. We certainly hope the Democrats in Arizona get their act together and put forth a decent candidate to run against this hypocritical used car salesman in 2018.

Dressed in his finest used car salesman ensemble, Arizona Senator Jeff Flake tries to sell people that he's against America's CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, when actually he has supported nearly everything he's done, to which Arizona voters call him on his hypocrisy and suggest he move back to his hometown of Snowflake, AZ.

Dressed in his finest used car salesman ensemble, Arizona Senator Jeff Flake tries to sell people that he’s against America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, when actually he has supported nearly everything he’s done.

Trump Fatigue Syndrome

The dog days of summer are here in America and people are sweating their arsenals off in every corner of the U.S. The monsoon season is upon us here in Arizona which means the normally dry air with <10% humidity, is now a swamp like 30-50%. Our energy levels are zilch. While we’re feeling the draining effects of the heat and humidity, we’re also suffering from something more insidious: Trump Fatigue Syndrome. Yes, we are so god damn sick and tired of this stupid President and his daily scandals, lies, deception and bullshit, that even hilarious commentary from comedians like Stephen Colbert, John Oliver and Samantha Bee isn’t helping. Even the news that Sean Spicer is resigning brings us no joy.

One reason is that we keep hearing that the shit is going to hit the fan real soon. But we’ve been hearing that for five months now. Nothing is happening, which gives us a nauseous feeling that justice will not be served. We just hope the scenario depicted in this photo-toon Meme-rie eventually plays out. It was originally a photo-toon featuring disgraced Bush administration member Scooter Libby from our March 11th issue in 2007. But we like to recycle here at the Bucket, so voila…here’s the Donald getting a special welcoming from his new bunkmate. In short: LOCK HIM UP!!!!  

P.S. If you’re thinking of visiting Arizona, do not come in July and August. See our old Cactus Corners Forecast category posts for clarification.

Donald Trump's new cellmate and friendly, loyal assistant asks if he likes spooning.

The only cure for Trump Fatigue Syndrome is placing the Donald in a new luxury residence complete with a friendly, loyal assistant.

What A Bunch Of Suckers

With the recent failure of the Republican Healthcare Plan or the American Health Care Act or Ryancare or Trumpcare, you would think that more of the people who voted for Trump would be realizing that he isn’t what he claimed to be. Although Trump’s approval numbers are abysmal, he’s still popular with most of his base. We’ve noted before that he is the master bait and switcher and that a few Trumpeters have come to the conclusion, albeit way too slowly, that the Affordable Care Act (Obamacare), while certainly not perfect or ideal, is actually a good thing and a good first step to what this country really needs: single payer health care.

So it brings us back to our continual bewilderment which we’ve talked about ad infinitum before: how the hell such an obvious con artist like Trump won the election. Why would anyone who made under 100k a year vote for a man who obviously supports the rich and wealthy and has proven it so far in his administration? He has loaded his cabinet with billionaire plutocrats and people whose only interest is in the well being of corporations, their stockholders and their own investment portfolios. His failed healthcare plan gave tax relief to the richest Americans. He’s admitted that his proposed tax plan would favor the wealthy. He’s also just signed a bill which repeals protection for workers from wage theft from unscrupulous employers, proving that in any given conflict, he will side with the rich executives and not the middle class and poor workers. But this isn’t just characteristic of Trump, the whole Republican party has been relentlessly cruel to the poor.  But yet the workers of this country continue deluding themselves that they’re temporarily embarrassed millionaires and worship the selfish, egotistical, greedy, ultra- materialistic, ultra-competitive assholes who populate the GOP.

So what do you call people who make less than 100k a year and yet vote for Republicans: Suckers!

What do you call people who make less than 100k a year and vote Republican: Suckers!

Many Trump and Republican supporters must face the ugly truth: they’re a bunch of suckers.

New Republican Health Plan: Just Die Already!

As expected, one of the first actions of the new Trump administration and the GOP controlled Congress is to repeal the Affordable Care Act, a.k.a. Obamacare. This despite the fact that the ACA has helped millions to afford healthcare and repealing it would eliminate insurance coverage for an estimated 32 million people. Everyone agrees the ACA is not perfect, but it is a great first step to something better, the ideal being a single payer health care system and eliminating the health insurance companies completely.  In short, the ACA is working. Not only that, the Republicans have NOTHING to replace it.

But that won’t stop the Republicans from trying to repeal it…because…you know…Obama likes it.  It’s amazing, but there are some people who want to get rid of Obamacare and keep the ACA, not realizing that they are the same thing. Jimmy Kimmel proved this recently on a segment on his show. What does this show? It shows that the Republican Propaganda Machine, a.k.a. Fox News and the right wing media like Breitbart, Rush Limbaugh et al, have been enormously effective at disseminating false news and deceiving the American public. That and a lot of Americans are lacking in the ability to think critically. Want proof? Look who’s President now!

American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and his GOP lackeys, Lyin' Ted Cruz, Mitch 'Turtle Boy' McConnell and Paul 'Jug Ears' Ryan have come up with a new health plan for all the sickos out there.

American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and his GOP lackeys, Lyin’ Ted Cruz, Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell and Paul ‘Jug Ears’ Ryan have come up with ‘the best’ new health plan for all the sickos out there.

Supreme Jesters

Boy the Supreme Court is certainly showing its true colors the last couple of years. First they showed what supreme corporate lackeys they were by giving corporations ‘personhood’ and then they said these ‘corporate people’ could give as much money as they wanted politically to senators and representatives who will do their bidding. Now apparently, corporations also have religious rights, too. In a landmark case this week, the Supreme Jesters said in the case of Burwell v. Hobby Lobby, that corporations could opt out of paying for an employees birth control because it went against their religious beliefs. Wow! Who knew that corporations could have religious beliefs. Now corporations can make healthcare decisions for their employees. Talk about your death panels, eh Sarah Palin! This decision also provides a loophole for those who oppose Obamacare. Just state that a particular medical procedure goes against your religion and whoop there it is. What’s next? A company or business refusing service to a customer based on religious belief? It almost happened here in Arizona folks. The christians are going to shove their religion down your throat whether you like it or not. (Interestingly enough, Hobby Lobby will pay for vasectomies and Viagra.)

So are you outraged that now corporations are not only citizens with religious beliefs but also more important than women. You can fight back. You hit corporate America where it hurts most; in the pocket book. That’s why we say BOYCOTT HOBBY LOBBY!! There are tons of arts and crafts stores out there. America is all about choice (except when it comes to women’s reproductive rights). Choose to cause Hobby Lobby’s failure. We know that you are mostly consumer automatons and that it’s in your wiring to buy, buy, buy. Be strong! Resist that burning temptation to buy lace doilies or glitter or craft foam or iron-on appliques. Buy them at a locally owned shop! Again we say,  BOYCOTT HOBBY LOBBY!!

Hobby Lobby founder and sanctimonious asswipe David Green says that women should be barefoot and pregnant and making crafts much to the chagrin of intelligent women everywhere.

Hobby Lobby founder David Green and his wife, whose name isn't important, preach their christian philosophy to ignorant, heathen women boycotting their store.

Top Holiday Gifts For 2013

The holiday season is in full swing. If you haven’t spent yourself into bankruptcy yet and are still looking for the right gift for that special someone in your life, look no further. Our intrepid staff has conveniently compiled a list of the hot “gotta have it” items for this years holiday season. Take this to the mall and don’t forget your helmet, spiked gloves and shoulder pads. Holiday shopping is dangerous!

  • An Official Miley Cyrus Foam Finger
  • A painting by George W. Bush of George W. Bush in the bathtub
  • ‘Moby Dick’ by Rand Paul
  • The NSA Super Snooper Spy Kit – For Kids
  • Ted Cruz’s new fragrance: Arrogant Ass
  • A lump of coal autographed by Dick Cheney
  • ‘The Great Gatsby’ by Rand Paul
  • Sarah Palin’s Book ‘Good Tidings and Great Joy’ Yule Log
  • ‘Kwanzaa For Dummies’ by Paula Deen
  • A Carlos Danger Action Figure with Realistic Twerkin’ Motion
  • Walter White’s Meth Starter Kit – For Kids
  • ‘Atlas Shrugged’ by Rand Paul
  • A ‘Jesus was a Liberal’ T-Shirt (blatant capitalistic plug)
  • Guns, guns and more guns
  • Healthcare

 

GOP’s Prayer Health Plan

It’s no secret that the Republicans have been against Obamacare since day 1; I mean they shutdown the government because of it. But at the same time, they’ve offered no plans of their own. But on the contrary…we found an article in our August 31, 2006 issue where the Republicans came up with a fantastic plan that had their party all a- titter with excitement.

Republicans Push New Prayer Health Plan

Responding to the fact that almost 46 million Americans are without health insurance, conservative congressional Republicans are pushing for a new faith based health plan administered by churches instead of insurance companies. Proponents estimate that this new prayer health plan could save people millions of dollars.

Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn, who is also a doctor, described the new plan. “This affordable plan works in the following way. The participant phones in a prayer to the health insurance prayer network and our authorized prayer speakers, who are much holier than you, say a prayer for your health and well being. All this for only $50 a month for a family of four. Of course, if you want holier people, like Pat Robertson or Jerry Falwell to pray for you, you can opt for the $75 a month plan; for a family of four. What a bargain! Then there is the elite plan where President Bush will pray for you for $100 a month. Just think; God’s chosen one praying for you and your family! You’re sure to stay healthy! These plans don’t cover single people over 18, because in the Lord’s eyes, you must be married to a member of the opposite sex, before your life is worth anything. And no atheists, non-Christians, tree-huggers, free-thinkers, anti-War protesters, abortionists, gun control freaks, gays, lesbians, Democraps or other liberal wackos. To be covered you must convert to Christianity and Republicanism. And what’s more, you don’t need to see a doctor since you’re connected straight to the Lord. It looks like I’m out of business, heh-heh!”

Many in the religious community hailed the plan as revolutionary. “This new health care plan is exactly what America needs,” said televangelist Jerry Falwell. “Every thinking man knows that germs, bacteria and viruses are just the creation of the liberal elite and smartsy fartsy scientists. The only way to truly protect you and your family against illness is to pray, pray, pray.”

Pat Robertson, host of the 700 Club, said “This is truly a great day for God-fearing Americans everywhere. Soon the evil, godless liberals will die off because they can’t participate in this plan and won’t want to convert. Then America will be cleansed and ready for the Rapture, which will be coming any day now, according to my communications with the Almighty.”

The Union for Advancement of Science spokesman Dr. Alfred Maxwell shook his head and said, “This is absolutely unbelievable. What is going on here? Have we taken a step back into the Middle Ages? What’s next? Witch burnings and inquisitions? I…I…I’m utterly speechless. This does it. I can’t stands it no more. I’m moving to Canada. Sure they’re idea of fun is curling, but at least if I get sick up there, it won’t put me and my family into debilitating debt for all eternity.”

Many Americans seemed relieved about the new health plan. Janice Wilcox of Shannon, West Virginia said, “Hallelujah! I never did trust those scientists and doctors. They said my lousy diet and no exercise was causing my obesity and bad health. Well nuts to them. All I need is prayer! I’m going for the President Bush plan. He talks to God, you know.”

Karl Billings of Tarrington, Georgia said, “At last; an end to all that evil scientific research and knowledge gaining. That stem cell research was just a liberal coverup for murdering innocent embryos. Maybe now people will do the Lord’s work and start killing some Muslims!”

Joe Jones of Lake Runamucka, Tennessee said, “Finally! An affordable risk-free health plan that’s sure to work.”

Season Of The Glitch

It’s no secret that the performance of the ACA website, healthcare.gov., has been less than spectacular. The words ‘lackluster’ or ‘dismal’ come to mind. But in these modern times of agile software development, where the goal is to just get the product out at deadline and then fix the myriads of problems after release, it shouldn’t come as any surprise at all to anybody familiar with software development. But you’d think the Obama administration would have found some competent developers on what will be his legacy piece of legislation. Nevertheless, the failures associated with healthcare.gov seem to be happening on very fundamental issues. It seems very fishy to us. Could there have been sabotage from…I don’t know…developers with conservative Republican bias? It turns out that the Canadian company, CGI, which contracted to do the website, contributed heavily to Republican coffers. Wow. Can you imagine a bunch of Teabagger patriots working on the site? No wonder it’s not working correctly.

A couple of highly competent Teabagger software developers work feverishly to fix the problems with healthcare.gov.

 

 

GOP’s Pyrrhic Victory

On Wednesday, Congress finally made a deal to fund the government and increase the debt limit, which was clearly a victory for President Obama and the Democrats. Right? Not so fast, America. Shutdown architect and smuggest Senator alive, Ted Cruz, declared that the shutdown was a great victory…for the Republicans???!!! Ah yes! The delusion continues…

Teabagger patriot and smuggest Senator alive, Ted Cruz, basks in the glow of his recent accomplishments.

The Fog Of Delusion

Republicans Holds America Hostage: Day 15…What?…Wait!…Day 15!!! Are you freaking kidding!!!

Well, the GOP shutdown clusterf*ck continues with no end in sight. According to polls everywhere, the Republicans are becoming less popular than syphilis. But Teabagger Extraordinaire, Ted Cruz, remains not only optimistic, but downright gung-ho. You see, according to the No-class Cruzer’s polls, the Teabagging Republicans are the most popular phenomenon since hula-hoops, transistor radios, crew cuts and slavery. Apparently, the right-wing bubble doesn’t permit 21st century reality to enter and is instead perpetually stuck in the 1950s or 1850s, take your pick. But have no fear America. Ted Cruz, Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann are here to guide us to the Rapture. Or as Bachmann put it, “Maranatha Come Lord Jesus, His day is at hand.” Great! Just in time for Halloween!

Teabagger patriots Ted Cruz, Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann, assure Americans that all is swell in Teabaggerland.