Tag Archive for christians

Faux News Hypocrisy

The heavily redacted Mueller report is coming out today, so we’ll have more on that in future posts. But we saw this YouTube clip and we couldn’t believe how it hit things right on the head. We’ve always known that Fox News was just a propaganda outlet for the right wing, conservativ,e christian Republicans. It was blatantly obvious during the Bush years and now with Trump in office they’re not even trying to hide it, although they do throw some flak out there, i.e. Shepard Smith, to show that they can be critical of Republicans. But when push comes to shove, they will always support the conservative Republican agenda and their nauseating sycophancy to the Trump presidency is proof.

We don’t usually post YouTube videos but this one is so damning of the right wing hypocrisy of the so called ‘journalists’ employed there that we feel we must link to it. For eight years, the personnel at Fox News, just like their right wing cohorts in congress, vilified Barack Obama and treated him and his family like dirt every chance they got – and it’s all on display in this video. For example, the whiners complain that Obama golfed too much, but Trump is on track to golf on the taxpayer’s dime much more that Obama. And neither is close to Woodrow Wilson. Not only that, Trump supposedly cheats like hell. Anyway, watch the clip and try not to punch out your monitor.

Don Quixote Trump

America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and the Republicans have had an absolute conniption fit recently over the Green New Deal and it’s main proponent, freshman congressperson from New York Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC). Last week Don Quixote Trump attacked windmills because…you know…noise from the evil windmills causes cancer and kills birds and stuff. He even did some windmill impersonations at one of his authoritarian ‘Nuremberg’ rallies last week. But let’s face it folks; the only birdies Trump cares about are the ones he’d wish he could get on the golf course because according to sources, he cheats a lot.

So why are the Republicans throwing hissy fits and temper tantrums over AOC and her bold environmental plan? Because the Republicans are lackeys for the fossil fuel industries: coal, oil, gas and mining. These corporations, who don’t give a rat’s patoot about the environment only want to continue their profitable ride on the gravy train. Their industries have been undisputed kings of the world since the late 19th century. They’ve got money and power and they’ll be damned if they’re going to lose their empire to clean renewable energy. That’s why the appointment of former fossil fuel industry lobbyist Andrew Wheeler as head of the EPA has been greeted so favorably by the smokestack and tailpipe suckers; he’s one of them. It’s like putting the fox in charge of the hen house. In short; the chickens(us) are doomed. Hence, all the attacks on AOC and the Green New Deal.

We have no doubt that the kingpins of pollution and environmental destruction will promote Trump as a noble capitalist on a quixotic quest to rid the world of these horrible, energy efficient, evil, killer windmills and their dastardly queen, AOC. It fits right in with the insane, right wing narrative that Trump is somehow making America great again. Perhaps a movie is forthcoming? We present below what that blockbuster may look like.

Don Quixote Trump: The fossil fuel companies send noble capitalist and stable genius Donald Trump on a quest to save their dying, inefficient industries. Trump, together with his EPA stooge Sancho Scienza (played by Andew Wheeler) and God (played by Mike Pence) battle the Evil Windmill Queen (played by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez) and try to destroy her vast, horrible, energy efficient windmill army. Rated R for Regressive.

Don Quixote Trump: The fossil fuel companies send noble capitalist and stable genius Donald Trump on a quest to save their dying, inefficient industries. Trump, together with his EPA stooge Sancho Scienza (played by Andew Wheeler) and God (played by Mike Pence) battle the Evil Windmill Queen (played by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez) and try to destroy her vast, horrible, energy efficient windmill army. Rated R for Regressive.

The Indictment Score: Benghazi 0, Mueller 37

The fallout from the release of the Mueller report (or should we say, Bill Barr’s Cliff’s notes of the Mueller report) continues and more and more questions have arisen. The majority of Americans want the entire report released, not the redacted ‘yada, yada, yada’ version offered by Attorney General and Republican obfuscator Bill Barr. The ‘journalists’ at Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, have been screaming their heads off about how other ‘fake news’ media should be apologizing for their treatment of the president. And of course, America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump has been his usual obnoxious self, proclaiming that everyone who said that there was collusion, especially the MSM or the ‘enemy of the people’, be fired or worse. Furthermore, the fine, right wing propagandists at Fox are clamoring for retaliatory investigations directed at Trump’s enemies.

As usual, conservative Republicans have a very short memory. Did they forget already about the Benghazi hearings which lasted two years and produced zero indictments; the very definition of a witch hunt. And conservative Republicans never apologized once for their treatment of Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama for that matter. Like we said on our previous post, the Mueller investigation was hardly a ‘witch hunt’ as it produced 37 indictments.  Because Barr has been so secretive about the report, of course the public is wondering what it really says, especially when even in Barr’s summary ‘fer idjits’  – “While this report does not conclude that the President committed a crime, it also does not exonerate him.” – , Trump clearly wasn’t exonerated on the charge of obstruction of justice, which was the most likely offense that would have resulted from the investigation anyway.

So, in a nutshell: Benghazi, 2 years – 0 indictments; Mueller investigation, 2 years – 37 indictments.

Republicans can STFU!!! 

The indictment scoreboard: Benghazi investigation - 0; Mueller 'witch hunt' investigation - 37.

The indictment scoreboard: Benghazi investigation – 0; Mueller ‘witch hunt’ investigation – 37.

America. Got. Played.

Well, the big news this past weekend was the release of the Mueller report. And the news was…disappointing to say the least. We here at the Bucket, like the rest of America, bought into the narrative pushed by the corporate main stream media that Robert Mueller was this grand bastion of unimpeachable integrity. He did produce 37 indictments(34 people, 3 companies) including six former Trump advisers. This and the evidence provided by the media painted a pretty convincing picture that showed Trump and his associates did something wrong. Why did he and his subordinates lie constantly about their Russian connections if they were so innocent? Why has Trump never criticized Putin and has just about glorified him every chance he gets? Trump threatened Comey repeatedly in his tweets and claimed in videos that he fired James Comey because he didn’t want to be investigated about Russia. How many countless times did Trump threaten to end the Mueller investigation?  But after two years, Mueller claims he didn’t have enough evidence of obstruction of justice but couldn’t exonerate him either. America witnessed the obstruction of justice first hand! What a bunch of bullshit!

Now Bill Barr claims that “there’s nothing to see here, folks” despite two years of investigation and 37 indictments and that we should just trust his biased opinion. Let’s face it folks, Bill Barr is nothing but a Republican hatchet man and crime obfuscator. He was brought in to kill the investigation like he did with Iran/Contra and that’s what he’s trying to do right now.  America is for the people, by the people. If the FBI spent two years of the tax payers money running an investigation, then the American people have a right to see ALL of that report. Remember, how the Republicans pulled a Benghazi witch hunt on Hillary Clinton for two years and the result was zero indictments, no evidence of wrongdoing. And Republicans cried and used Benghazi to slander Clinton and Obama to win the 2014 midterms and 2016 elections. But the Mueller investigation wasn’t a witch hunt, because there has been – let us repeat – 37 indictments including several people closely associated with Donald Trump. Stephen Colbert did a brilliant assessment Monday night. Trump is still under investigation for a boatload of other things and despite Trump’s gloating, he is far from the innocent victim he proclaims himself to be.

Now, because the corporate main stream media has given constant coverage of Donald Trump and the Mueller report and all things Republican for the last three years (hell… the last twenty years), the orange haired man child just may win re-election in 2020. It’s now plainly obvious the fix has been in for the last three years. America got played! And now with Trump supposedly ‘cleared of any wrongdoing’, his knuckle dragging, racist, right wing authoritarian loving supporters will become even more emboldened. We’ve been waiting for Trump militias to form and now maybe they will with the help of Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network. Trump certainly indicated that recently with his mention that his supporters may have to get tough with Democrats. We’ve learned many things about Trump since his rise to national prominence the last twenty years and especially since he’s become president and one of the most glaring is that if you give him an inch, he will take a hundred miles.

This whole affair stinks to high heaven. We’ve lost a little respect for Mr. Mueller and have completely lost faith in the American justice system. One thing is for sure: the leadership in this country is jam packed with wealthy, white, entitled good ol’ boys who want to stay in power no matter what and they’ll do anything to preserve their hegemony. It’s all bullshit. The media, the plutocrats, the Republicans and even some of the Democrats are playing the American people for fun and profit. They don’t give a shit about real Americans, the people of the 99%.

So what should we do? Keep on fighting. It’s springtime so that means there will be good weather ahead. Maybe groups of Americans can march peacefully on Washington repeatedly over the next six months and remind these blowhards what by the people, for the people really means.

America's CEO/Dictator and 'completely exonerated' Donald Trump proudly proclaims his godliness to the masses while Attorney General and Republican crime obfuscator Bill Barr and former defender of democracy Robert Mueller passively look on.

America’s CEO/Dictator and ‘completely exonerated’ Donald Trump proudly proclaims his godliness to the masses while Attorney General and Republican crime obfuscator Bill Barr and former defender of democracy Robert Mueller passively look on.

Rewind: Dubya’s 2007 SOTU Speechifying

American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump finally gave his State of the Union address this past week after having it postponed due to the shutdown of the government for 35 days  because he wanted his unnecessary border wall. In typical Republican fashion, he pleaded for unity while simultaneously bashing the Democrats for the Russia probe or as Don the Con called it ‘partisan investigations’.

This reminded us of a similar State of the Union address by none other than ol’ Dubya after the GOP got thumped in the 2006 elections because of the Republicans’ disastrous policies during the Bush administration. In that SOTU, Bush trashed the Democrats while all of a sudden supporting things like healthcare and climate change. (For a hilarious breakdown of that 2007 event, watch Jon Stewart’s classic video…belly laughs even after 12 years!).  Of course, all the corporate media, including late night comedians like David Letterman, could focus on was how many times new Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi blinked her eyes. We even made a photo-toon having fun with it, which we’ve rehashed below with our article about Dubya’s speechifying.

But Nancy Pelosi performed very well during this SOTU with her sarcastic clapback. We hope that Ms. Pelosi’s strong attitude toward the Republicans continues. The last thing we need is four more years of the orange haired man child in the White House, which is what happens if the Democrats let the Republicans control the narrative in the media like they’ve done too many times in the past.

It has become crystal clear: the Republicans are no longer the party of Lincoln. They aren’t even the party of Eisenhower or even Reagan. The last two Republican commanders-in-chief, Bush and Trump, have been the worst presidents since World War II and that’s including Nixon, he of the Watergate break-ins who was ‘not a crook’. The GOP is a broken, criminal party and shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near government ever again. Like we’ve mentioned before: modern day Republicans don’t want small government, they want NO GOVERNMENT! And they just proved it with the longest government shutdown in history!

This article is from our January 31, 2007 issue.

Bush Addresses Nation; To ‘Surge’ On Healthcare, Global Warming

At his State of the Union address last week, President Bush touched upon many issues like the war in Iraq, the economy, and two issues that have suddenly become very important for him; healthcare and global warming.

After introducing new Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, Bush got down to business. “We’ve got a new Democrat congress so I’ll dumb it down a little bit this year. Heh-heh. People we need to give ‘Surge’ a chance. Now there are some people who think we need to leave Iraq, like the Democrats, the Republicans, the Iraqi Study Group, the Iraqis, a majority of people in the World, and even one of my dogs, Ms. Beazley…the damn bitch. Now I acknowledge their opinion, but since I’m the Decider, we will stay in Iraq whether they like it or not. And we will confront any Iranians which may be trying to influence the Iraqi government. You see, only we can meddle in other country’s affairs. It’s not only in the Constitution but God told me so. Remember, I’m tight with the Big Guy.”

“And speaking of ‘Surge’,” continued Bush. “Did you like my little segue? Pretty cool, huh. Anyhoo, we need to not only ‘Surge’ on our new way forward, we need to ‘Surge’ ahead on the very real threat of global warming. Now I know what you’re all thinking, ‘Who’s going to win that swell Super Bowl game?’ Well folks, I think the best defense is a good offense, which is precisely our strategy in the Middle East. See how everything comes around. Wait a second… my train of thought derailed.” Bush then excused himself, turned and talked to Vice President Cheney, who hit himself in the forehead with his hand and brusquely reprimanded the President while Nancy Pelosi blinked in disbelief.

After a few seconds of confusion, Bush continued his address. “Like I was saying. We need to ‘Surge’ ahead on stopping global warming. That’s why I’m proposing we spend a whopping one thousand dollars to combat this menace. I also propose a New Way Forward Health Plan which will make health insurance affordable to all Americans…with an income over $100,000 a year. The rest of you will just have to work harder. Fortunately, the economy is going like gangbusters. Plus, according to our new federal accountants, who, by the way, did the books over at Enron, we’ve only got a deficit of $250 billion now. By next year it’ll be gone. See tax cuts to the rich do work.”

“I’d like to close by saying, I’m taking the Colts by ten. Oh, I almost forgot. Terror. Terror. Terror. 9/11. 9/11. 9/11. God Bless America only!”

Afterwards, the President addressed his many critics. “A lot of people were disappointed that I didn’t mention anything in my speech about New Orleans. Well, I was going to mention them but the Saints lost to the Bears so I lost that reference. Why else would I mention New Orleans? Did something important happen there in the past couple of years that I should know about?”

President Bush gives a warm welcome to members of both parties at the 2007 State of the Union address. Vice President Cheney and new Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, react in the background.

President Bush gives a warm welcome to members of both parties at the 2007 State of the Union address. Vice President Cheney and new Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, react in the background.

The New Flake In Town

The new members of the Senate and House have been sworn in and with it an old familiar face is back on the American scene. Utah’s ‘new’ Senator replacing useless, senile fossil, Orrin Hatch, is none other than Spiff Romney, 2012 GOP presidential candidate and used car salesman extraordinaire. The Spiffster dominated our Conathon 2012 coverage with his gleaming white Pepsodent smile and promises to serve the people, and by people we of course mean corporations.

Romney appears to be taking up the mantle of his departed fellow Mormon, Arizona’s own Jeff Flake, in that he immediately wrote a ‘scathing’ article critical of Donald Trump. Really???!!! Even Trump saw through that one, calling Spiff the new Flake in one of his temper tantrum tweets. It didn’t take long for Romney to show what a feckless adversary he would be by remaining mum on of the current border wall bullshit.

As if on cue, the corporate media announced that Romney and Nebraska’s Ben ‘Sassy Boy’ Sasse are the GOP’s new ‘mavericks’.  Really???!!! And people still think the corporate media is liberal in bias? Only conservative entities would brand these two stick in the muds as ‘mavericks’. So we’re wagering that in the next two years both Romney and Sasse will be promoted as ‘sane’ alternatives when the S.S. Trump eventually sinks and corporations are looking for new lackeys to promote the Republican, plutocrat and corporate media mantra of ‘tax cuts for the rich, screw all others’. Ahhhh! The capitalism con game continues!

Former GOP candidate and new feckless Senator, Spiff Romney, proclaims himself to be the new Jeff Flake who will bloviate against and then boldly cave in to every demand of America's CEO/Dictator Donald Trump.

Former GOP candidate and new feckless Senator, Spiff Romney, proclaims himself to be the new Jeff Flake who will bloviate against and then boldly cave in to every demand of America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump.

These Boots Were Made For Kicking Ass

We’ve decided to kick off the new year with a positive, non-Trump (or at least a minimal-Trump) post. Since the Democrats are now in charge of the House and Nancy Pelosi is set to become the Speaker of the House, we’re feeling a lot better about perhaps some justice coming to American CEO/Dictator and ill-tempered man child, Donald Trump, after two years of lies and corruption from his administration.

But in the mean time, let’s devote a little time to one of our favorite people here at the Bucket, Michelle Obama. The former First Lady has been making the rounds promoting her best selling book, Becoming. But she caused quite a sensation recently when she showed up to an event wearing a pair of $4000 designer boots. Now we adhere to the Henry David Thoreau mantra of “Simplify, Simplify” so we all think that’s a bit much to be paying for a pair of shoes. Staff member and living fossil Chester Einstein grumbles about paying $20 for a pair of loafers at Payless. But we’re also aware that conservative Republicans, who preach austerity to their sheeple, regularly go out and spend gobs of money on extravagant, expensive material possessions (see Newt Gingrich, Mitt Romney, The Bushes, etc…). For instance, take current First Lady Melania Trump…please. She regularly wears glitzy, lavish, ostentatious clothing: remember her ‘fashionable’ “I don’t really care, do u” jacket. But then Republicans bitch anytime Democrats spend even a little bit of money. Sean Hannity and the faux journalists at Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, threw a memorable hissy fit when Barack Obama ordered spicy mustard for his burger back in 2009. Oh the humanity!!!

So although we pinch pennies better than Jack Benny, we think Michelle Obama looked fantastic and we say “Go get ’em!”  Who can forget her classy speech from the 2016 election when she said, “When they go low, we go high.” For normal, sane humans who believe in civilized society, these words are inspirational and right in line with the golden rule. But right wing, conservative, ‘christian’ Republicans only mocked and derided her. So, we’d like to suggest an minor update to our favorite First Lady for dealing with today’s Trumpian Republicans: “When they go low…put on some shiny pointy toe boots and kick their f***ing asses.”

Former First Lady Michelle Obama has updated her mantra from the 2016 election to now say when they go low just put on some shiny pointy toe boots and kick their f***king asses

Former First Lady Michelle Obama has updated her mantra from the 2016 election to include some ass kicking of modern day Trumpian Republicans.

Stephen Miller’s Fascist Hairstyles

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has taken ownership of the government shutdown all because he wants his precious border wall, which only right wing, anti-immigrant fascists want and a majority of Americans think shouldn’t be a priority. Like the stubborn man child he is, he’s hunkered down in the White House acting like the petulant megalomaniac he is, sending out pitiful ‘poor me’ tweets on Christmas Eve.

But what was really funny was when he recently sent out his Joseph Goebbels-in-training, Stephen Miller, to make the rounds advocating the border wall. In typical dickhead fashion, Miller humorlessly drove home his bullshit on news while sporting what looked to be spray on hair. Of course, the media took notice and mocked his horrible fashion sense. But maybe Stephen Miller has a future as a fashion icon for the alt-right authoritarian movement. We can definitely see a whole line of Stephen Miller hairstyles of the spray on variety for the fascist dickhead in your family.

Stephen Miller, ‘senior’ advisor to American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and alt-right wunderkind, has come out with fashionable hairstyles for the fascist dickhead in your family.

Stephen Miller, ‘senior’ advisor to American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and alt-right wunderkind, has come out with fashionable hairstyles for the fascist dickhead in your family.

Trump’s New Babysitter

Chief of Staff John Kelly has announced that he is leaving the clusterf*ck that is the Trump administration by January 2nd, 2019. This has brought about another crisis for America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, who hasn’t been able to find anyone who wants the job. Nick Ayers, Mike Pence’s chief of staff, was considered first but he declined. Other names floated around were Trump’s Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin, Trump’s son-in-law Jared Kushner and his own daughter Ivanka. Not even colossal sycophant Chris ‘Suckinupagus’ Christie wants this lousy job.

Enter OMB director, carnival barker and corporate lackey, Mick Mulvaney, who has been named interim chief by Trump. The Mickster has shown shameless shilling skills for the moneyed elite in the past, so he’s comfortable dealing with spoiled rich plutocrats who want to have their way at any and all costs. Mulvaney is such a hypocrite he called Trump a ‘terrible human being’ just days before the 2016 election, but yet he’s decided now to take the position. But the honeymoon is over before it started for Mulvaney as Trump has already voiced complaints about him because of the video. Yes, we’re thinking that Mulvaney could be gone before 2019 even gets started.

OMB director, carnival barker and corporate lackey, Mick Mulvaney, shows what a hypocritical twit he is by becoming America's CEO/Dicator Donald Trump's new Chief of Staff/babysitter.

OMB director, carnival barker and corporate lackey, Mick Mulvaney, has been named the new Chief of Staff/babysitter for America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant child, Donald Trump.

Oval Office Follies

The big story this week was the Oval Office budget meeting between America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence and Democratic House and Senate leaders Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer. We’ve had our doubts about both Pelosi and Schumer because they’re both corporatists who do their fair share of cozying up to moneyed interests and they’ve shown in the past a willingness to cave in a little too quickly to Republican demands (like many other Democrats have done in the past twenty years, i.e. the Iraq War, Patriot Act, etc…).

But we’ve got to admit that we like what we saw from Pelosi and Schumer. They made Trump look like a buffoon by getting him to take ownership of any looming government shutdown on video for the whole country to see. Meanwhile, Mike Pence sat like a bump on a log in his chair, doing absolutely zilch, zippo, nada, bupkis, diddly-squat. We love all the Pence memes that are making the rounds this past week. We like that comment that he looked like he was at a strip club. Yes, America… if Trump is impeached, then we’ll be in the stoic, ultra-conservative hands of Puritan Pence, which gives no sane person in America a warm fuzzy.

In a recent Oval Office budget meeting with Democratic House leader Nancy Pelosi, Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence tries to keep his thoughts pure while America's CEO/Dictator Donald Trump tries to keep his thoughts empty.

America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence use impressive conservative skills to outmaneuver Democratic House leader Nancy Pelosi in a recent Oval Office budget meeting.