Tag Archive for evangelical

Rewind: Reality Check

The election season is driving us crazy so this post deals with something remarkable thanks to the scientists at NASA. Recently, NASA’s spacecraft Lucy sent back stunning photos of the Earth and the Moon from about a million miles and half a million miles away that reminds us how insignificant we are in the universe. It’s not the first to show the Earth and moon together but it’s probably one of the best.

We’re reposting a pic from July 26, 2013 when the Cassini spacecraft was still operational. That probe sent back an astonishing photo of the pale blue dot through Saturn’s rings. We thought it appropriate to add a little notation as a reality check to the denizens of planet Earth that God and all the other mythical gods were created on that insignificant speck by the species of animal known as homo sapiens. That’s right, folks: God didn’t create man; man created God.

The people of Earth created God not the other way around
The Cassini spacecraft orbiting Saturn sends a reality check to all religious people on the pale blue dot called Earth.

The Ignominious MTHead

The up and coming Republicans in the House of Representative are notorious for one reason – they’re all colossally stupid. Take Matt Gaetz … please. Much like his mentor TFG, Gaetz makes ten inane comments each day before breakfast. Then there is Colorado’s answer to Sarah Palin, Lauren Boobert (misspelling intended). She thinks she’s actually in the same class as AOC, but her comments and actions say otherwise. But the biggest ass on the GOP’s team has to Marjorie Taylor Greene, a.k.a. MTG or as she should be called MTHead. This living relic of Neanderthals and Cro-Magnons mating has collected an astonishing collection of insipid statements in just less than two years of serving as a representative for Georgia’s 14th district which covers the northwest corner of the state.

Just how dumb is this woman? Here’s just a partial summary of her stupidity. MTHead stated that the 2018 California wildfires was started by Jewish space lasers. MTHead stated that Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi uses her gazpacho (instead of Gestapo) police in order to spy on House members. MTHead was stripped of committee assignments because she spread QAnon conspiracy theories and incited violence against Democrats. MTHead has repeatedly called coronavirus a hoax and proudly spread anti-vaccine disinformation which won her a ban from Twitter. MTHead has been at the forefront of supporting TFG’s big lie about non-existent election fraud. MTHead has openly supported Russia’s dictator Vlad Putin in his illegal war against Ukraine. MTHead is famously pro-gun and anti-abortion. Her latest of countless gaffes is her conspiracy about Bill Gates forcing us to eat burgers made in peach tree dishes (instead of petri dishes). Holy Freaking Zeus, folks!!! This woman is a complete train wreck!!! What a MORON!!!

Unfortunately, the problem is that the district MTHead represents is heavily right wing conservative Republican. She just handily won her primary and looks to be a shoo-in for another two years despite being possibly the stupidest Congressperson in history. We know one thing: we will never visit that section of Georgia. The people who would elect this imbecile are not worth knowing.

The dull, ovine stare, Neanderthal head shape and insipid commentary on Jewish space lasers, gazpacho police and peach tree dishes indicate that Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia's 14th district may be the stupidest member of the U.S. House of Representatives ever.
The dull, ovine stare, Neanderthal head shape and insipid commentary on Jewish space lasers, gazpacho police and peach tree dishes indicate that Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia’s 14th district may be the stupidest member of the U.S. House of Representatives ever.

The Rise Of The Sanctimonious Assholes

With the impending Supreme Court decision overturning Roe v. Wade, thus ending a woman’s autonomy over her own body, the radical, right wing, authoritarian conservative christians are finally making their move. It’s been fifty years in the making and it shouldn’t be surprising to anybody who has been paying attention. The Republican Party has been taken over by the evangelical christians and it’s never been more evident than during the disastrous presidencies of George W. Bush and TFG here in the twenty-first century.

John Dean’s excellent book Conservatives Without Conscience mentions the rise of the religious extremists and how former Arizona Senator and conservative icon Barry Goldwater lamented their influence over the Republican party. It was Goldwater who suggested the book to Dean as a warning to what would happen if these zealots took over the party. Amazingly, Goldwater would probably be booted out of the party he once headed because his stances would be considered too moderate for today’s GOP. For instance, Goldwater was pro-choice, supported medical marijuana and advocated for gay rights. The former Senator stated about conservative christians:

Mark my word, if and when these preachers get control of the [Republican] party, and they’re sure trying to do so, it’s going to be a terrible damn problem. Frankly, these people frighten me. Politics and governing demand compromise. But these Christians believe they are acting in the name of God, so they can’t and won’t compromise. I know, I’ve tried to deal with them.

Unfortunately, his prescient words have come to pass. The Supreme Court is loaded with regressive thinking religious conservatives who believe that Americans should be connecting to a first century database instead of a twenty-first century one. Furthermore, as we have found out in the past twenty years, compromise is a four letter word to them as they think that going to church every Sunday and saying prayers by rote like the sheeple they are somehow makes them superior to everyone else. Like we’ve mentioned before, they want to make America into the Holy Corporate Empire by any authoritarian means possible.

The late Senator and conservative icon Barry Goldwater of Arizona knew all too well how impossible the holy roller evangelical christians are to deal with and now these sanctimonious assholes control the Republican party and are hell bent on imposing their will on all Americans.
The late Senator and conservative icon Barry Goldwater of Arizona knew all too well how impossible the holy roller evangelical christians are to deal with and now these sanctimonious assholes control the Republican party and are hell bent on imposing their will on all Americans.

GOP Baby Factories – a.k.a. Women

The right-wing dominated Supreme Court has shown their true intentions about abortion rights by recently letting stand severe abortion bans in Texas and Mississippi. We’ve been screaming about their intentions for years here at the Bucket. States with Republican leadership ranging from bible thumping states like South Dakota and Alabama to our home state of Arizona have been slowly chipping away at abortion rights over the last twenty years. Religious zealots have seized control of state and federal government and forced their horribly archaic, first century viewpoints upon the citizenry of the country because these holy huckster bible thumpers still view the woman as nothing more than a baby factory. If these people were truly pro-life, they’d realize that the woman’s life should come first. But then hypocrisy does seem to be commonplace with these sheeple. They claim to be pro-life but then fervently support gun rights. They claim to be pro-life but then violently protest getting a life saving vaccine against a disease that has claimed over 800,000 people in the US and over 5 million word wide.

We’re re-posting a photo-toon from January 11, 2006 when ol’ Dubya nominated Samuel Alito to the Supreme Court. This was the beginning of the end because since then, Alito, Thomas, Kavanaugh and Coney Barrett (the Handmaiden’s Justice) have formed a staunch conservative religious bloc on the court that not only wants to force women through unwanted pregnancies but also to knock down the wall between church and state, thus forcing all of us to adhere to outdated, biblical philosophy whether we like it or not. Like we’ve stated before, we’re regressing rapidly toward America becoming the Holy Corporate Empire.

Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito displays the only tool (a wire hanger)which will enable a woman to terminate a pregnancy once he's on the bench.
Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito displays the only tool which will enable a woman to terminate a pregnancy once he’s on the bench.

Portrait Of Failure: The Trump Revolution

Inauguration Day has finally come and once again America has a President again instead of an orange-haired, megalomaniac, ranting, raving, man child CEO/Dictator. Donald Trump has flown off to his lair in Florida and competency has returned to the White House. Sane, intelligent, democracy loving Americans are breathing freely again as well as people in countries around the world, as Joe Biden prepares to , once again, clean up another fricking mess made by Republicans.

We don’t usually toot our own horn here at the Bucket, but we predicted what the coming conservative revolution led by Trump might look like back in our post of November 17, 2012. After the 2012 election, Donald Trump started whining about how Mitt Romney was robbed, thus laying the groundwork for Republican claims of election fraud in the future. Trump, who was a Tea Party/Teabagger darling at that time, also threatened to run for President which prompted our photo-toon (which we’ve reposted below) showing the complete ridiculousness of the prospect of a Trump presidency as he incites his Teabagger/future MAGA warriors onward to a glorious conservative revolution while he sits in his luxurious CEO chair stroking his hair and his massive . . . ego.

Unfortunately for the world, Trump unbelievably became President in 2016 and his presidency turned out to be every bit as catastrophic as people thought it would be, culminating in a despicable, treasonous assault on the Capitol on January 6th. In true Trump fashion (and like we predicted), he egged his sycophantic supporters on to commit treason while he took a cushy seat in the White House watching the mayhem. It should be noted that no pardons were issued for any of the people who stormed the Capitol at Trump’s request. But Steve Bannon, the man who ran a scam collecting money from the sheeple for the non-existent border wall, was pardoned. The MÆGAMoron, QAnon, evangelical rubes finally found out the hard way that Trump was nothing but a con artist who conned them nine million ways to Sunday.

In photo-toon summary, this is how Trump’s ‘revolution’ turned out.

Here’s our photo-toon from November 17. 2012 – the Inception

Megalomaniac Donald Trump vows to do his part in the coming conservative revolution.
Megalomaniac Donald Trump vows to do his part in the coming conservative revolution.

Here’s our latest photo-toon – the Insurrection. It sucks to be a Trump supporter.

A couple of ardent, redneck Trump supporters find out the hard way that they were duped nine million ways to Sunday by megalomaniac man child Donald Trump.
A couple of ardent, redneck Trump supporters find out the hard way that they were duped nine million ways to Sunday by megalomaniac man child Donald Trump.

So Much Whining

It’s been two weeks since the 2020 presidential election and ten days since Joe Biden was declared the president-elect and still America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump is throwing a hissy fit like a three year old toddler, proclaiming all the while that he didn’t lose the election and that he will never concede. He has launched several unsuccessful attacks trying to overturn the results in states like Michigan , Georgia and Pennsylvania but to no avail. Trump lost the election, by a ‘landslide’ (in 2016 Trumpianese) and he refuses to deal with it and many Republicans, like Lindsey Graham, are supporting his efforts. What’s more, the Trump administration’s refusal to interact with the Biden transition team is further endangering our democratic institutions and emboldening his insane right wing followers like QAnon, the Proud Boys, and evangelical zealots who act more like demons than their hero, Jesus.

Maybe Trump should take a page out of his 2016 election victory and call on his pal Vlad Putin to interfere, which was confirmed by the Mueller report. But it’s probably too late for those kind of shenanigans. We just heard that Putin only likes Presidents who don’t lose. Tough luck, little Donny! We guess it’s back to your incessant whining and diaper pooping.

America's Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump receives a wake-up call from his former BFF Vlad Putin.
America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump receives a wake-up call from his former BFF Vlad Putin.

Rand’s Gospel O’ Greed

The coronavirus pandemic rages on with over 1.4 million cases in the U.S. and over 88 thousand deaths (that’s almost 30 9/11s folks). And yet, many states, like Wisconsin, have decided that it doesn’t matter that the curve hasn’t flattened yet in the U.S., the economy must be restarted, damn the consequences. The gods of greed on Wall Street must be sated and stock prices must climb no matter how many people become sick and die. Money, money, money! Greed, greed, greed!

We’ve commented many times about the hypocrisy of right-wing, conservative, christian Republicans who proclaim their love of Jesus but in the same breath advocate the ramblings of Ayn Rand, who taught the gospel of greed: greed is a good thing; who cares about community; promote yourself constantly, to hell with all others; I got mine, screw you. We’ve got evangelical hucksters preaching the prosperity gospel. Former Speaker of the House Paul Ryan, professed to be a catholic but at the same time admired Rand. But Rand’s philosophy is the exact opposite of Jesus’ teachings as this linked article points out. Rand promoted being selfish where Jesus said that being selfless and caring about your fellow man is the way to live your life.

Now we’re atheists here at the Bucket, so at first glance one might think we’d be in Rand’s corner, since she was atheist, too. But we’re also non-materialistic environmentalists. We need to live in harmony with our environment. We advocate the ‘simplify, simplify’ mantra of Henry David Thoreau. We also live our lives according to the golden rule, which is completely in line with the teachings of Jesus. We’re absolutely anti-greed and anti-corporation and call out the conservative christian Republican hypocrites who see no problem promoting both Rand and Jesus.

The grand problem for today’s christians is that they’ve been brainwashed by our capitalistic overlords that socialism is a bad thing when in actuality, Jesus’ teachings were socialistic. Unfortunately, our brand of capitalism has taken root throughout the civilized world and it’s taken the coronavirus pandemic to show how utterly cruel, empty, unethical, immoral, corrupt, depraved, inhumane and unchristian modern day capitalism is. Greed is not good! If humans have to sacrifice themselves at the altar of capitalism so the economy can function, then maybe we should look to another economic system like socialism to keep our civilization sane, wise and healthy.

Modern conservative christian Republicans seem to have no problem with the hypocrisy of worshipping both Jesus, who preached selflessness, and Ayn Rand, who advocated selfishness and greed.
Modern conservative christian Republicans seem to have no problem with the hypocrisy of worshipping both Jesus, who preached selflessness, and Ayn Rand, who advocated selfishness and greed.

The Virus Whisperer

America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump ratcheted up his audacity to yet another level of absurdity this past week. Upset that his precious stock market gains were being erased by the coronavirus, our grown-up Bart Simpson President proclaimed that things will officially be back to normal by Easter, which caused countless simultaneous facepalms by health professionals throughout the world. This shouldn’t be surprising since Trump was pretty pissed off that Hurricane Dorian changed course last year and made dear Leader look bad.

Trump’s colossal ego and narcissism is not only boundless but dangerous. His delusion that he’s somehow on equal footing as scientists and doctors produced a drastic result this past week as an Arizona man died taking chloroquine phosphate, a derivative of an anti-malaria drug cholorquine that Trump touted as being a possible cure for coronavirus, which again prompted a multitude of facepalms from science professionals. You can’t just tell a virus what to do no more than you can tell a hurricane what to do, but don’t tell that to ‘master scientist’ Trump. Apparently, he thinks he’s some kind of virus whisperer. Fortunately, Dr. Anthony Fauci, one the country’s leading disease experts and a member of Trump’s coronavirus team, stepped up and said that the virus makes the timeline not humans. We’re predicting that with that kind of attitude toward facts, truth and honesty, Dr. Fauci may not be on Trump’s team much longer.

Trump’s choice of Easter is also very telling of another group in his base that he’s trying to appease; the evangelical christians. Remember: he’s got holier-than-thou rapture freaks Mike Pence, Mike Pompeo and Bill Barr in his administration. What better symbolism could you ask for than having America reborn from a horrible scourge on Easter, the day Jesus ‘resurrected from the dead’. Trump says he even wants to pack the churches with the faithful to celebrate. As we mentioned in our last post, we have no doubt Trump will politicize the coronavirus for the upcoming election. If everything appears to be fine by Easter then he will proclaim it to be an ‘Easter miracle’ and he will appear even more like ‘the chosen one’ to his brain dead zombie followers.

Actually, we have no problem with Trumpty Dumpty’s plan of packing the churches on Easter. Just ignore stories of pastors who thought coronavirus was a hoax and died or an entire congregation who met at a church event resulting in three dozens infections. It’s just fake news. Trump knows best. If Trump’s MAGA supporters want to defy doctors and scientists and gather together and spread the COVID-19 to other sheeple in the flock, then we here at the Bucket say go right ahead. Let Jesus take the wheel. When you get sick, just don’t go to the ‘evil’ scientists or doctors for help; just hunker down and pray to God or Donald Trump to be magically cured. Yeah . . . that will work well.

America's Impeached CEO/Dictator, stable genius, bestest scientist ever, virus whisperer and the self proclaimed ‘chosen one’, Donald Trump, gets tough with coronavirus, not because it's killing and endangering innocent people, but because it's lowering his precious stock market gains.
America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator, stable genius, bestest scientist ever, virus whisperer and the self proclaimed ‘chosen one’, Donald Trump, gets tough with coronavirus, not because it’s killing and endangering innocent people, but because it’s lowering his precious stock market gains.

Just Pray The Virus Away

Once again the Trump administration has trolled the world, this time with its response to the coronavirus breakout which has infected 90,000 worldwide. The stock market has also had a roller coaster ride the last two weeks, with daily swings of at least 800 points seemingly every day. We mentioned a few posts ago, we think the media is sensationalizing things just like they did in the past fifty years with the swine flu, MERS, SARS and Ebola. You know the old corporate media adage: if it bleeds, it leads; if it can scare, then we care. With every one of these breakouts, which were supposed to be the next plague, scientists were able to get things under control – using science – and a true pandemic crisis was averted. Education, prevention, proper hygiene, listening to the scientific experts and lack of panic are key elements in battling any potential medical emergency.

So who does America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child, Donald Trump, choose to be his coronavirus czar? None other than Mr. Anti-Science himself, Vice President Mike ‘Puritan Pants’ Pence. Pence doesn’t accept evolution as fact, folks. He believes in the biblical explanation of creation and he also is one of the rapture cultists along with Mike Pompeo who have infiltrated the executive branch. He probably even doubts gravity exists. So what will be Puritan Pence’s solution to the crisis? We have no doubt that there will be a heaping helping of prayer involved. We’ve already seen evangelical nutbag Jim Bakker push his cure all elixir on his bible thumping show. Could Pence push something like this to Trump’s sheeple followers? Hey, there’s money to be made from these rubes and as we all know, Trump loves the green stuff. So, you betcha.

We’re also positive that Trump could care less about the coronavirus or its victims. His only concern is how to use it politically so he can get re-elected. So, if the breakout does actually become a pandemic, then he can blame Puritan Pence. If the breakout turns out to be like Ebola in 2014, then he can blame the media for over-hyping the situation, which he’s already doing. Either way, Trump has set himself up not to be the fall guy, in typical Trumpian fashion; nothing is ever his fault. And more importantly for the power hungry, authoritarian GOP, his path to re-election is clear and unobstructed. No wonder the conservative Republicans love him; they’ve never accepted responsibility for anything in the last sixty years, other than tax cuts to their plutocrat overlords.

Vice President and anti-science advocate Mike 'Puritan Pants' Pence has been named the head coronavirus guy by America's Impeached CEO/Dictator and stable genius Donald Trump and promptly proclaims that only 24/7 prayer to God or Donald Trump can rid our nation of this dreadful scourge.
Vice President and anti-science advocate Mike ‘Puritan Pants’ Pence has been named the head coronavirus guy by America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and stable genius Donald Trump and promptly proclaims that only 24/7 prayer to God or Donald Trump can rid our nation of this dreadful scourge.