Archive for October 21, 2020

The Handmaiden Justice

While many Americans need desperate relief from the disastrous effects of the on-going coronavirus pandemic, what do the Senate Republicans do? They hold confirmation hearing for their super religious handmaiden justice candidate, Amy Coney Barrett. In the first week of hearings, Ms. Barrett certainly did nothing to allay Democrats’ fears about her abolishing abortion rights, LGBTQ rights, voting rights, delaying the election, eliminating Obamacare and blocking any kind of legislation for regulating climate change. She repeated didn’t answer Democrats’ questions pertaining to these subjects. Propagandists over at Fox Propaganda Network openly proclaimed that her notebook was blank, meaning she was so sharp she didn’t need notes. Well, when you don’t answer any of the Democratic Senators’ questions, we guess you don’t need any notes. As far as we’re concerned, her brain was as blank as her notebook and her sanctimonious, holier-than-thou stare.

But there is little the Democrats can do. Ms. Barrett’s confirmation is pretty much a done deal and it will probably put her on the bench right before Election Day. Gee, how convenient! And Republicans keep stating over and over that they’re worried about Joe Biden packing the court if he gets elected when that’s exactly what they’ve done for the past twenty years. Al Gore won the popular vote in 2000 and yet George W. Bush got to pick two conservative justices (Roberts and Alito). Hillary Clinton won the popular vote in 2016 and yet Donald Trump got to pick three conservative judges (Gorsuch, Kavanaugh and now Barrett), not to mention Mitch McConnell refusing to hold confirmation hearings for Merrick Garland, who should rightfully be occupying a seat on the Court. So that’s five conservative judges where there should have been five left leaning or moderate judges; all stolen by Republican shenanigans the past twenty years.

We’ve got a lot of problems with Ms. Barrett’s confirmation and the main reason is because she is obviously very religious and will no doubt let her religious brain washing influence her decision making. Confession time: Editor-in-chief Dex Rexter was raised catholic (and is happily far removed from that ‘cult’, as he calls it) and knows very well the holier-than-thou type that Ms. Barrett obviously is. When Ms. Barrett refused to answer questions and gave the world her blank stare, this is a typical reaction of everyone who was raised catholic and is questioned about their beliefs. All christians are taught to have the victim mentality, meaning that whenever they are questioned about their beliefs or faith, they envision themselves as martyrs; St. Sebastians tied up pierced with arrows or St. Joan of Arc being burned at the stake. The questions don’t matter because in her brain washed mind, she is doing God’s work and everyone who rightfully questions underlying motives are just heathens slinging their arrows and swinging their torches. This God Delusion (see Richard Dawkins), is enormously dangerous for sane, logical, rational people with education based on scientific facts and reasoning. We’ve mentioned this before; the people who wrote the bible knew nothing compared to what we modern day humans know. The biblical 1st century database is minute compared to the colossal 21st century database chock full of scientific facts and data. Why anyone would still let dogma written before the 19th century influence their lives is beyond comprehension. The only behavioral rule people need to follow is the law of reciprocity or the golden rule, which pre-dates the foundations of judasim, chrisitianity and islam. The ten commandments are just the golden rule stated ten times.

So there you have it. The modern day handmaiden Amy Coney Barrett will stomp all over Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s legacy and more than likely mark the return of back alley abortions, make it tougher for people to afford healthcare, ignore and vilify scientific consensus and make it difficult for any person who is different (translation: anyone who isn’t a straight christian) to get a break in America. Of course, if she is confirmed before election day, she may even rule, with her fellow religious, conservative zealots on the bench, that Donald Trump will somehow get to stay President even though he and all his Republican sycophants are getting slammed in the polls and could be in for a blood bath on election day. Like we’ve said before; get ready for the Holy Corporate Empire, folks.

With a blank notebook, stare and brain, Supreme Court nominee and modern day handmaiden Amy Coney Barrett proudly announces her desire to implement outdated, regressive 1st century dogma on a 21st century society as Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence becomes overstimulated.
With a blank notebook, stare and brain, Supreme Court nominee and modern day handmaiden Amy Coney Barrett proudly announces her desire to implement outdated, regressive 1st century dogma on a 21st century society as Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence becomes overstimulated.

Trump Sez Don’t Fear The COVID!

Straight from the poetic justice files: recently America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump, fresh from being thumped and humiliated at the first and hopefully last Presidential debate of the 2020 election season, announced that he tested positive for coronavirus, this after months of downplaying the virus despite over 200,000 Americans dying from COVID-19, the disease caused by the virus. He was airlifted a day later to Walter Reed Hospital where he received top notch medical care and a ‘cocktail’ of medications including a drug called Regeneron which Trumpty Dumpty touted a miracle drug claiming that he felt like ‘Superman’ after the treatments, despite the CEO of Regeneron claiming more tests are needed.

The Trump manure and virus spreader really tilted into overdrive after that. Much to the dismay of any competent doctor’s recommendations, Trump returned to the White House the following Monday, took off his mask and visibly wheezing and struggling to breathe, declared that people shouldn’t fear COVID-19. Over the course of the following week, Trump has proclaimed that he must be ‘immune’, implying himself to be some kind of superhuman. He gave an interview with his favorite ass-kisser Fox Propaganda Network’s Sean Hannity where he noticeably hacked his way through the interview. Meanwhile, White House doctor Sean Conley trashed any trace of respectability he had left by stating that Trump was symptom free, despite not having tested negative for the virus, and could resume regularly scheduled campaigning events, while most medical experts are crying bullshit.

There’s no way Trump is not contagious, that is if he even had coronavirus in the first place. The whole scenario just doesn’t pass the sniff test. But yet Trump is out again doing his rallies, completely maskless. His message of not fearing COVID falls woefully flat because 99.9% of people in the United States can’t be airlifted to Walter Reed and given the same treatment the President gets. If people do end up contracting the disease, most would end up with debilitating hospital bills and possibly permanent health damage. But then again, Trump’s only concern is about getting elected again, not if Jane and Joe Smith end up getting the virus and paying for it with their life.

Do the Republicans really think they can get away with this tomfoolery? Of course they do! They’ve gotten away with it for four years, why wouldn’t they. Hell, that’s been the modus operandi for the GOP the past fifty years: bully their way into doing anything they want and if things go wrong, blame it on the Democrats, who inevitably end up fixing things only for the Republican sheeple to buy the next con the Republicans dish out to them. Rinse and repeat.

America's Impeached CEO/Dictator, petulant man child and coronavirus superspreader, Donald Trump, declares that Americans shouldn't fear COVID-19 despite most not having access to the same medical care that the President does, while 'Doctor' and Republican lackey Sean Conley proclaims the orange skinned megalomaniac to be the perfect human specimen.
America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator, petulant man child and coronavirus superspreader, Donald Trump, declares that Americans shouldn’t fear COVID-19 despite most not having access to the same medical care that the President does, while ‘Doctor’ and Republican lackey Sean Conley proclaims the orange skinned megalomaniac to be the perfect human specimen.

VP Debate Winner: Super Fly

The Vice Presidential debate took place Wednesday night in Salt Lake City, Utah and at least it was civil despite Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence trying to do his best Donald Trump impersonation by lying his ass off and interrupting Democratic candidate Kamala Harris repeatedly. As expected Harris did a solid job and most thought she won the debate. Our favorite moment was when Senator Harris boldly stated (a few times) when Pence tried to interrupt her “Mr. Vice President, I’m speaking.” But let’s face it, folks; VP debates have always been a bit of a side show and usually don’t change voter’s minds too drastically.

However, the real star of the VP debate was the fly that landed on Mike Pence’s head midway through the debate. But this fly was no ordinary fly. This scene stealing ‘Super Fly’ stayed put for almost two minutes while Pence rambled on with his propaganda and drivel. It’s become an internet sensation. We here at the Bucket noticed that the image of the fly on Mike Pence bore an uncanny resemblance to a fly on a pile of shit. The similarities are remarkable. We’re sure some alt-right, QAnon nut job will come up with some conspiracy theory that good ol’ Super Fly was some kind a miniature drone built by the Democrats in order to make Mike Pence look bad. Sorry, conservative wing nuts; old Puritan Pence is quite capable of looking bad all by himself.

The image of a fly sitting on Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence's head during the VP debate bears an uncanny resemblance to a fly sitting on a pile of shit.
The image of a fly sitting on Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence’s head during the VP debate bears an uncanny resemblance to a fly sitting on a pile of shit.

Despicable Debatacle

I don’t think we can describe the first Presidential debate debacle (or should we say debatacle) better than CNN’s Dana Bash when she called it a ‘shitshow’. The reaction from world governments was pretty damning as well. The Guardian called is ‘a national humiliation’ while an Israeli TV anchor said, “Condolences to America. . . it’s harder to sink lower than this.’

And who made it a shitshow? Why none other than America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child little Donny Trump. Good fricking grief! What an asshole he was! Joe Biden couldn’t get a word in edge wise because our megalomaniac dear Leader kept interrupting him like a goddamn baby. At least Joe Biden told him to shut up a couple of times. Normally, we’d not approve of that kind of behavior, but look who Uncle Joe was dealing with. Sometimes you have to put the crybaby in a timeout and let him think about what a little prick he’s being.

But what was really alarming was that Fox Propaganda ‘journalist’ Chris Wallace lobbed a softball question for Trump about denouncing white nationalists and the bellicose, orange haired prevaricator botched that, saying instead that Proud Boys should ‘stand back and stand by’. That certainly sounds like ‘get ready to rumble’ to us. Of course, all the GOP sycophants in Congress and the media have been in full gaslighting mode trying to tell the American people that they didn’t hear what they heard. Trump ass-kisser extraordinaire Sean Hannity was even gloating that Trump was a new style of mighty warrior. Holy Shit!!! What an addleheaded asshole!!!

The only thing the debate proved was that Donald Trump is a goddamned crybaby and shouldn’t be allowed to be President. But then again we’ve known that ever since he first announced his was running for office. Dealing with Trump is like playing chess with a pigeon, with Trump playing the part of the bird. The pigeon Trump will knock over all the pieces and poop on the board and claim complete and total victory, which is what Trump did on Tuesday night. We have no doubt he will probably try to do the same thing on November 3rd.

America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man-baby Donald Trump whines that Joe Biden is kicking his ass and calls on his right wing thugs to save his presidency thus destroying democracy.
America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man-baby Donald Trump whines that Joe Biden is kicking his ass and calls on his right wing thugs to save his presidency thus destroying democracy.