Tag Archive for capitalism

Rootin’ Tootin’ Trump

The Trump hush money payment to Stormy Daniels trial is entering its gazillionth week and there has much commentary about the orange megalomaniac man child’s flatulence. Yes, the twice impeached Putin fan boy is blowing vile gas from both his mouth and his anus. That’s talent, folks! From all accounts, it’s like the stockyards in the courtroom and Trump’s lawyers may be sporting gas masks soon.

Which reminds up of our post from July 25, 2020 during the heart of the pandemic and Con-a-thon 2020. It was then that Trumpty Dumpty and his darling daughter Ivanka became embroiled in a ethical conundrum by endorsing Goya beans while in the White House. That’s a no-no, but then again Donald Trump does what ever he wants, which is why he has four trials with a grand total of 88 criminal counts. We speculated at the time that maybe Trump was going to launch another failed business venture called Trump Beans. Maybe that’s why he’s been giving ten toot salutes in the courtroom: he’s just full o’ beans.

From the fine people who brought you Trump Vodka, Trump Air, Trump Water and Trump University comes their next doomed endeavor, the ultimate in designer beans, Trump Beans. Because when it comes to beans, Trump is full of 'em. Trump Beans is the winner of the coveted Ten Toot Salute award created by Donald Trump for excellence in bean stuff. Like Ivanka sez, jump start your farts with her Daddy's favorite, Trump Beans. Rumors that these beans cause explosive flatulence and chronic diarrhea are a hoax. Go ahead and eat 'em. What have you got to lose.
From the fine people who brought you Trump Vodka, Trump Air, Trump Water and Trump University comes their next doomed endeavor, the ultimate in designer beans, Trump Beans. Because when it comes to beans, Trump is full of ’em. Trump Beans is the winner of the coveted Ten Toot Salute award created by Donald Trump for excellence in bean stuff. Like Ivanka sez, jump start your farts with her Daddy’s favorite, Trump Beans. Rumors that these beans cause explosive flatulence and chronic diarrhea are a hoax. Go ahead and eat ’em. What have you got to lose.

Rewind: Planet Earth’s Epitaph

Earth Day was celebrated last week on April 22 and things are still not looking good for our planet. Meteorologists are predicting another summer of scorching temperatures and the hurricane season will be busier than usual. We’ve already had a deadly tornado outbreak in the Midwest and it’s not even May yet.

We published a post back on September 25, 2019 which summarizes very well (at least we think so) what we need to do if we’re to save our wonderful planet from further destruction. Rather than republish the complete post, we’ll just repeat the main points of the piece.

So who’s to blame for our planet’s destruction? The inconvenient truth is that all humans are responsible. It’s the collective, monstrous egos of our planet’s most intelligent (allegedly) species, homo sapiens, that have done the most damage. When you put it in that context, each and every human being on the planet is responsible for the demise of life on Earth. We are all to blame and if we’re to rectify the problem, we need to all get on the same page. We all need a giant philosophical paradigm shift and that starts with the realization that unregulated capitalism is killing the planet and all the life on it.

But how and why did having money become the most important thing in our world? Because we’re humans, goddamn it! We’re superior creatures! What are we humans supposed to do with our time? Go hiking in the wilderness, relax and enjoy life? Boring!!! We must grow, grow, grow! Bigger, bigger, bigger! We’re taught from day one that we must utilize our superior brains every second of the day or else we’re failures. We can’t just sit around doing nothing. Or can we? If you ask any sane person what their idea of paradise is, they’ll usually respond some idyllic tropical island like Tahiti or some mountain retreat with little to no development and lots of nature or some small remote village where people live simply. So, why are we constantly destroying nature (we’ve killed off 60 percent of animal species since 1970) and building ugly concrete and steel structures and athletic stadiums which only last for twenty years? Because we can; as a monument to human ingenuity and greed.

But just because we can do something, doesn’t mean we should. Would it really be so bad to just not build a new multiplex shopping center? Would it be so bad to adopt a simpler lifestyle and enjoy nature and the great outdoors? Would it be so bad to tear down some of our ubiquitous, ugly strip malls and skyscrapers and plant urban forests and farms? Plant an urban garden where that stupid parking lot is. Have a nature reserve where that stupid golf course is. If we combine this with a global effort of birth control and contraception, we can get things under control again. We need fewer humans, not more humans on this planet. Humans, especially ones from industrial, consumptive nations are at the forefront of environmental devastation. We’ve created so much waste that we’re exporting it to third world countries with poor waste management systems. If third world countries become like first world countries, then our planet is truly doomed and we can all kiss our materialistic asses goodbye. We need to dial our greed back from 11. We need to curb our consumption and learn to be content with fewer material possessions and simpler lifestyles. This is the only planet we know of that supports life. We need to put the welfare of our planet before our own wealth, because without the planet, how can we enjoy the wealth? We need to stop worshipping the greedy, egotistical and avaricious and start respecting and caring for nature and our environment. Those paradises we yearn for are right under our feet; we just don’t recognize them because of all the concrete, asphalt and steel.

In an attempt to demonstrate how superior they are, humans are proving to be far more destructive to planet Earth than any asteroid.
In an attempt to demonstrate how superior they are, humans are proving to be far more destructive to planet Earth than any asteroid.

The Sheeple Still Bleat

Back in our September 6, 2018 post, we addressed the perplexing phenomenon of christians supporting Donald Trump, a man who is basically different from Jesus in every way, shape and form. We think it’s one of our better posts (click on the link above and read it) and perfectly summarizes why christians seem to follow authoritarians. Since then, Trump has only gotten worse and the MAGA Morons have officially obtained cult status with many loony tunes preachers actually stating they think TFG is the chosen one. Of course, ever the bombastic, narcissistic con man, Trump encourages them. He’s even hawking bibles for $60 a pop.

We’re going to just repeat most of that post with some changed links here because nothing has changed. Why are MAGA Morons worshipping Trump as their new Lord and Savior? Well, you can thank their teachers, pastors, priests and leaders for brainwashing them from day one to believe everything they say and that anybody who says otherwise is an agent of Satan. We’re atheists here at the Bucket, but we do abide by the golden rule, which pre-dates christianity. We were brought up in an religious environment, so we know from whence we speak. The organized christian religions are very authoritarian in nature; just look at the catholic church. The pope is considered to be infallible. That means he is never wrong and if you even suggest that he could be wrong, then you will face the consequences of excommunication or damnation in that mythical place of pain and suffering, hell. Dex Rexter, BilgeBucket editor, remembers very well the nuns searing into his young, malleable catholic brain to never, never, NEVER be a doubting Thomas or Jesus will be very upset with you and cast you into the pit of hell for all eternity. Fear is used as a weapon from day one on people in organized religious environments and used quite effectively. Just look at the art work of Hieronymous Bosch from the fifteenth century. Do what the preacher says and you’ll get to go to heaven; disobey and go to hell and get poked by demons with pitchforks. Of course, in reality, heaven and hell don’t exist. But this use of fear by religious authoritarians is the same methodology employers in corporate America get their employees to do whatever they want. They dangle that golden carrot telling their subordinates that if they work extra hard they’ll be rewarded with riches beyond their dreams, knowing full well that when the employee inevitably burns out or outlives their usefulness, they’ll be fired. Just ask the employees of Enron, Carrier or any of the other shit load of companies who’ve screwed their employees and consumers to augment the coffers of the top executives.

Another thing that is astonishingly aggravating is that many christians are anti-science and actually call critical thinking, logical and rational people who accept the truth of such things as climate change or evolution, sheeple. Really!? How ironic! Christians are the original sheeple! It’s even built into the dogma. Every christian is forced to pray the mantra “The lord is my shepherd, I shall not want…” or think for that matter. The metaphor of Jesus as the shepherd and everyone else as the sheep is everywhere in the christian faith. That is why the congregation must do what the pastor, priest or minister tells them to do, like vote for Trump, because the self acclaimed holy men are tighter with God than the average commoner. That’s how these prosperity gospel charlatans get away with their crap and the people’s money for materialistic wealth that Jesus taught against.

Make no mistake; the Republicans have exactly who they want in the Oval Office, that is why they are sitting on their keisters why all chaos descends on the this country. Trump is the ultimate CEO; the exemplary authoritarian who barks out orders and condemns those who dissent. We ask the christian sheeple to wake up and realize that this wolf in sheep’s clothing, this golden calf, is nothing like Jesus, who preached the golden rule, to have tolerance and respect for others even if they were different and to eschew greed and materialistic wealth and to take care each other.

From Jesus to Donald Trump, christians unquestionably follow their authoritarian leaders like the good sheeple they are.
From Jesus to Donald Trump, christians unquestionably follow their authoritarian leaders like the good sheeple they are.

Pepe Trump Still Croaking Fake News

Way back on July 7, 2017, during TFG’s first term, we posted a photo-toon highlighting the twice impeached former American CEO/Dictator’s war on truth. Trump openly called everything the press reported as ‘fake news’ unless of course it was complimentary. Back then, the QAnon weirdos and MAGA Morons were just coming out of the woodwork and these specimens mostly watched Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network. Now the number of conservative media outlets have multiplied and more and more of the sheeple in the MAGA movement ignore any information unless it comes from the mouth of the orange skinned megalomaniac man child.

Like we said back in 2017, Trump’s war on the media is insidious and incredibly dangerous for a free society. Freedom of the press is one of the cornerstones of our democracy. But Trump has made no secret that he wants to be a dictator like his man crush Russian dictator Vladimir Putin. And with that desire comes the flak generator of conservative media outlets and unregulated social media sites like Twitter and Facebook spreading lies, misinformation and propaganda so successfully, it’s become a full time job for an average citizen just to determine the truth. So what is the truth? According to Trump, it’s anything he says it is.

Here’s a repost of our photo-toon from July 7, 2017. We think the flabby green ‘Pepe’ (instead of orange) skin on his saggy ass jowls are pretty appropriate for this croaking bag of goo.

When you want fake news, who you gonna call? PEPE TRUMP!!!
When you want fake news, who you gonna call? PEPE TRUMP!!!

The Clown Prince of Journalism Returns

Unfortunately, Tucker Carlson is back making news again because he decided to travel to Russia and interview Russian dictator Vladimir Putin. Now, Tuckhead isn’t with Fox News, a.k.a. Republican Propaganda Network, but he’s just trying to reestablish his journalistic credentials by trying to take on a living James Bond villain.

How did it go? By most honest accounts, Carlson failed miserably. Putin basically blathered on about his own propaganda of how Ukraine doesn’t even exist as a nation. Putin even managed to insult Carlson to his face leaving the crown prince of journalism simpering like the fool he is. Seriously, how did any Republican, or American for that matter, allow Putin have this platform to push his propaganda? News flash: we’re supporting Ukrainian democracy, not Russian authoritarianism! We have a suggestion to any Republican who thinks Putin is awesome: move to Russia! Putin wants nothing more than to end the United States of America. If the U.S. is out of the picture, he will control or influence, along with China, most of the countries in Europe, Asia and Africa. What he has done since the fall of the Soviet Union is use capitalism against us and he’s done it pretty effectively by completely buying the GOP and dividing America with a campaign of disinformation through social media, where articles with the most clicks must be the truth. Who would have thought that so many Republicans would now worship the leader of a country Reagan labeled as the evil empire. We repeat: if you think Putin is so great, move to Russia!

Finally, we wonder what would have happened if the clown prince of journalism had lived during World War II? Tucknuts probably would have yucked it up with Hitler the same way he did with Putin. What a putz!!!

If Tucker Carlson, the clown prince of journalism, had lived during World War II, we're sure he would have given German dictator Adolf Hitler the same kind of 'grilling' he gave Russian dictator Vladimir Putin.
If Tucker Carlson, the clown prince of journalism, had lived during World War II, we’re sure he would have given German dictator Adolf Hitler the same kind of ‘grilling’ he gave Russian dictator Vladimir Putin.

The Golden Calf Still Bleats

America’s twice impeached former CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump, a.k.a. TFG, is still bleating to his MAGA Moron followers how persecuted he is with some of his sheeple touting him as the new Jesus. We delivered a post back on April Fool’s Day in 2017 which pretty much sums up what Donald Trump is.

Since nothing has changed about this charlatan since then, our analysis still applies: If you make under 100k a year and you vote Republican, you are voting against your own self interests and you are a sucker and a fool. Or to put it in biblical terms, you are worshiping a modern day golden calf and that calf’s name is Donald Trump.

Donald Trump - Modern Day Golden Calf
The biblical myth of the golden calf has resurrected itself in the form of American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump.

Rewind: The Earth Speaks

2023 marks the 20th anniversary of the BilgeBucket Gazette. Our first issue was on May 19, 2003 and we’ve been shoveling it to the public, just like the corporate media, ever since. We changed our format to a WordPress blog in 2011 so all of our earlier material was archived. We’ve been reposting many of those archived articles, headlines, photo-toons, BilgeBucket Lists and other content over the past twelve years. In honor of our 20th, and because we’re sick of the current state of affairs in the world, we’ll be reposting more items from 2003 through 2009 throughout this year.

This repost isn’t from 2003-2009 but it is very appropriate given the latest turmoil in the Middle East. We originally posted it to honor Earth Day but we feel it covers the deadly conflicts that constantly seem to erupt in that region as well. The Middle East: it could very well lead to the death of the Earth. Way to go, humans!

This photo-toon is from our April 22, 2012 post.

The Earth comments that humans will be the death of it
The space station astronauts took this rare photo of the Earth commenting on the latest violent conflict to erupt in the Middle East.

Rewind: Dubya’s Duplicity On Iraq

2023 marks the 20th anniversary of the BilgeBucket Gazette. Our first issue was on May 19, 2003 and we’ve been shoveling it to the public, just like the corporate media, ever since. We changed our format to a WordPress blog in 2011 so all of our earlier material was archived. We’ve been reposting many of those archived articles, headlines, photo-toons, BilgeBucket Lists and other content over the past twelve years. In honor of our 20th, and because we’re sick of the current state of affairs in the world, we’ll be reposting more items from 2003 through 2009 throughout this year.

Currently the Republicans are trying to gaslight their way to trying to get TFG elected in 2024 by claiming that all those indictments are a nothing burger. One might think that their duplicity is new, dating back only to the rise of Trump. But the GOP’s dishonesty goes way back. Remember Nixon(Watergate), Reagan(Iran-Contra) and both Bushes(Gulf War, Iraq War, Afghanistan War)? Volumes of lies, deception and propaganda to go around. Since most Americans seem to have the memory of a gnat (somehow, people actually approve of Dubya now), let’s revisit a fairly recent event of GOP gaslighting in 2006 when Dubya tried to spin our reasons for continuing the clusterf*ck in Iraq. The Bush administration repeatedly used the phrase ‘stay the course’ in the early phases of the war and then promptly did an about face, actually gaslighting the people saying that they didn’t use the phrase. That’s so Republican!

Here’s an article, selected quotes and lil’ Dub Toon from our October 28, 2006 edition.

Bush Revises Iraq War Rationale Again

President Bush recently held a press conference stating that the war in Iraq is all about oil and the new reason for staying the course in Iraq is that we need to save civilization. Previous reasons included finding weapons of mass destruction, liberating Iraqis from dictator Saddam Hussein, establishing democracy throughout the Middle East, training the Iraqis to police their own country, making sure the new Baghdad KFC and Pizza Hut’s were safe, and because ‘Uncle Dick and Rummy said so – so there’.

“You see my fellow Americans,” said President Bush. “If them Iraqians actually start using some of that oil under their country that’s rightfully ours – because we’re Americans –the price of gas will skyrocket. Everybody was bellyaching about the price of gas this past summer, but if you think that was bad, wait until we leave Iraq and let the Iraqians run things. We must stay to keep gas prices low. You could say we came for the WMDs and stayed for the oil. Hey! That’s pretty funny.” Bush then chuckled to himself for two minutes.

Vice President Cheney emerged from his secret undisclosed lair, brushed the President aside and said, “Out of my way monkey boy! This isn’t about oil at all. This is the last chance for Western Civilization as we know it. It’s up to me and Rumsfeld to save the world. We’re the only ones who know how to exploit the region for fun and profit. I ask you my fellow Americans. Do you really want to take food out of the mouths of innocent Halliburton employees? That’s why we must win the war in Iraq and you must elect Republicans in this upcoming election. Because if you don’t, the next thing you know, we’ll be riding in ox carts, eating dates and drinking camel’s milk. Terror. Terror. Terror. Fear. Fear. Fear. God Bless Me and Rumsfeld!”

Joan LeBlanc of the international watchdog organization, Citizens For Peace, said “This is just another example of the lies and distortions this administration doles out to the American public on a daily basis. The truth is we are stuck in Iraq, thanks to this administration’s incompetent decision to invade in 2003. If we stay we will continue to be caught in the middle of sectarian violence. If we leave, Iraq will devolve into full scale civil war. We are damned if we do and damned if we don’t. The genie is out of the bottle and it won’t be going back in any time soon. Pandora’s box is opened. The can of worms is not only open, the worms are spilling out all over the place. The scab has been picked and the wound is infected and oozing with pus. Well, I’m out of cliches. I’m done.”

However, American citizens seemed okay with the White House’s latest explanation. Senior citizen Ruth Thomason of Des Égout, Mississippi said, “I believe the Vice President when he tells me we need to stay in Iraq to save civilization. I also believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the tooth fairy with whom I’m very upset. She hasn’t left me any money for my teeth in the last sixty years and I’m beginning to get a bit miffed.”

Fred Granger of Tuckerville, Illinois said, “Well I was damn mad at the President about everything. Damn mad, I tells ya! I was even going to vote an all Democratic ticket this election. But then the price of gas dropped. Can you believe it’s almost $2 a gallon? Well, all’s forgiven Mr. President. I’m voting Republican.”

Tom Carter of Dorfman, New Jersey said, “I know the Republicans have completely botched the situation in Iraq but I’m comfortable with their incompetence. Go GOP!”

June Amerson of Julesberg, Washington said, “I’m voting for the Republicans because they’re strong on terrorism even though that report that came out says terrorism is much worse in the world since we invaded Iraq. Wait a second. Let me think about that. No wait. Thinking is too tough. Republican it is!”

“We will stay the course. “

George W. Bush
08-30-2006

“We will stay the course, we will complete the job in Iraq. “

George W. Bush
08-04-2005

“And that’s why we’re going to stay the course in Iraq. And that’s why when we say something in Iraq, we’re going to do it.”

George W. Bush
04-16-2004

“And my message today to those in Iraq is: We’ll stay the course.”

George W. Bush
04-13-2004

“And so we’ve got tough action in Iraq. But we will stay the course.

George W. Bush
04-05-2004

“We will stay the course until the job is done, Steve. And the temptation is to try to get the President or somebody to put a timetable on the definition of getting the job done. We’re just going to stay the course. “

George W. Bush
12-15-2003

George W. Bush's pants catch on fire after his latest prevarication about never saying 'staying the course'.
“Stay the course? Nuh uh! I never said stay the course!”

Rewind: Supreme Corruption

2023 marks the 20th anniversary of the BilgeBucket Gazette. Our first issue was on May 19, 2003 and we’ve been shoveling it to the public, just like the corporate media, ever since. We changed our format to a WordPress blog in 2011 so all of our earlier material was archived. We’ve been reposting many of those archived articles, headlines, photo-toons, BilgeBucket Lists and other content over the past twelve years. In honor of our 20th, and because we’re sick of the current state of affairs in the world, we’ll be reposting more items from 2003 through 2009 throughout this year.

In our last post we recycled a photo-toon showing how corrupt the Supreme Court had become since the 2010 Citizens United decision which gave the rich unfettered power to influence politicians. We had a link to an old post with another photo-toon about the Supreme Court’s corruption which we’ve decided to repost as well.

We’ve already talked about Clarence Thomas’ luxury trips courtesy of conservative billionaire Harlan Crow. It’s come out now that Justice Thomas has been influenced even more by an elite circle of plutocrats. Surprise, surprise! Lawrence O’Donnell gave an excellent commentary about Thomas the other night which is pretty much right on the money, pardon the pun. Is it any wonder that so many Americans have no faith in the Supreme Court. Like we’ve said before, the current Supreme Court is supremely corrupt and the justices who have accepted gifts from wealthy benefactors should resign if they are truly interested in maintaining a judicial system based on ethics and morality.

Poor Plutocrats everywhere are rejoicing now that their corporate lackeys on the Supreme Court have given them control of America.
Plutocrats everywhere are rejoicing now that their corporate lackeys on the Supreme Court have finally given them a voice in the running of America.

Rewind: Judge(s) For Sale

2023 marks the 20th anniversary of the BilgeBucket Gazette. Our first issue was on May 19, 2003 and we’ve been shoveling it to the public, just like the corporate media, ever since. We changed our format to a WordPress blog in 2011 so all of our earlier material was archived. We’ve been reposting many of those archived articles, headlines, photo-toons, BilgeBucket Lists and other content over the past twelve years. In honor of our 20th, and because we’re sick of the current state of affairs in the world, we’ll be reposting more items from 2003 through 2009 throughout this year.

Over the last three years, especially since Roe v. Wade was overturned last year, information has been revealed showing that our supposedly ethical, apolitical and morally superior Supreme Court judges may not be so noble. Apparently, all six conservative judges have ethics scandals where they have been influenced by wealthy conservative benefactors thus jeopardizing the impartiality of the justices or compromised by conflicts of interest with business deals. It was just reported that Judge Samuel Alito took luxury fishing trips with a billionaire conservative donor. Judge Clarence Thomas took luxury vacations and received tuition payments for a relative from conservative plutocrat Harlan Crow. Judge Neil Gorsuch had a suspicious property sale to a prominent law firm head nine days before his confirmation hearing. The FBI revealed that its pre-confirmation investigation into Judge Brett Kavanaugh was a complete sham. Judge Amy Coney Barret had a shady real estate deal with a religious group that filed numerous briefs before the court. Judge John Robert’s wife made over ten million dollars as a legal consultant. Even liberal leaning Sonia Sotomayor refused to recuse herself in a case with a book publisher who paid her three million dollars for a book deal.

The die was cast for what’s happening now with the Supreme Court back in 2010 when the Citizens United case was decided which basically stated that corporations are people and that these rich entities may give unlimited amounts of money to politicians and government officials in the pursuit of political power. We’ve had a few posts and photo-toons over the years indicating that the Court was now for sale to plutocrats (here and here). Our first one was a photo-toon on August 13, 2011 which basically portrayed the Supreme Court as being for sale to the highest bidding corporation that we decided to repost because it is very appropriate considering recent revelations. As we’ve noted before, the Roberts court a.k.a. the American Taliban, is a complete joke.

Supreme Court Justice John Roberts wears the new NASCAR inspired corporate logo robes because corporations are people, too - very, very , very rich people
Supreme Court Justice John Roberts wears the new NASCAR inspired logo robes which will now be worn by all conservative justices.