Archive for Holy Huckster Hijinx

Wake Up America!

We’re still astonished that forty percent of Americans are still supporting America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, even after he’s admitted to collusion with Russia and practically knelt down and licked Vladimir Putin’s shoes during their summit in Helsinki. Of course, over the course of the last three years there have been many moments when Trump did or said something so incredibly insipid, stupid or ridiculous that any sane person would have thought surely people would abandon him. But not only are his base supporters applauding him, (Trump supporters are even wearing “I’d rather be a Russian than a Democrat” t-shirts) but the Republicans are doing nothing to reprimand him or reign him in thus indicating they are fine with Russia intervening in our elections, especially if it keeps Republicans in power.

Can you imagine the outrage if decent Republican presidents of the past like Eisenhower or Reagan had done what Trump has done? What if Eisenhower had said he didn’t trust the CIA and invited Krushchev to put missiles anywhere he wanted? What if Reagan (who called the Soviet Union the evil empire) fawned over Gorbachev, calling him ‘strong and powerful’? Can you imagine the outrage if Obama had asked Putin to help him win his elections? We’re living in a time where the supposedly ‘moral and righteous’ Republican party is anything but. The Republicans are nothing but feckless, mendacious hypocrites who revel at putting party above country, truth and justice. At least it seems with recent primary elections that some Americans are finally waking up to the GOP’s treachery.  Just this week, the Ohio congressional seat special election in district 12 is still too close to call and this district is about as red as you can get. We have one thing to say to Trump supporters or people on the fence about our orange haired, man child president: Wake Up!

Can you imagine the outrage if Eisenhower said he trusted the KGB more than the CIA or if Reagan fawned over a 'strong and powerful' Gorbachev or if Obama received help wining his elections from Putin.

Modern day Republicans conveniently look away from Trump’s outrageous actions that would have gotten previous presidents universal condemnation.

Putin’s Bitch

We’re still flabbergasted by Donald Trump’s performance at his summit with Vladimir Putin in Helsinki a few weeks ago. We’ve never seen such a shameful display by a United States president. Many others, including Republicans agree with us. Dubya came close when he got all romantic about looking into Putin’s eyes and seeing into his soul, ”I looked the man in the eye. I found him to be very straightforward and trustworthy. We had a very good dialogue. I was able to get a sense of his soul.”  But Trump’s actions boggle the mind.

To make matters worse, Trump insists on gaslighting Americans by stating that Russia is really sorry that Trump is President …er… CEO/Dictator and that they might influence the upcoming election… for Democrats.  But all indications are that because Trump and the Republicans are in power, Russia and Putin are relevant on the world stage again and they couldn’t be happier. Or like Trump said in Helsinki, “Putin is strong and powerful.”

And all pictures and videos seem to back this up.  There are very few pictures from the Helsinki summit where the normally glum Putin, isn’t smiling, like this pic from after Trump’s secret meeting with Putin. Oh yeah… Trump really looks like he’s laying down the law to Putin. Russia must really have something good on Trump… just sayin’.

America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, boldly lays down the law with Russian president, Vladimir Putin.

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, boldly lays down the law with Russian president, Vladimir Putin.

Full On Fascism

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has been busy this past week doing more outrageous, inane acts and his Republican cohorts in Congress keep shaking their heads, castigating him about the acts and then sitting on their ass doing nothing like the feckless cowards they are. This kind of complicit behavior is indicative that the GOP not only doesn’t have a problem with Trump, they approve strongly of his actions. Republicans have been wanting to establish permanent dominance over this nation for some time and now they’ve got their authoritarian bully in the White House to make it happen.

Trump and his sycophants at Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, have blabbered that a coup is coming by the Democrats using any means possible, like immigration protests. But as usual, Trump lies and deceives. No, the real coup arrived with the 2016 election when the Russians helped Trump and the radical, conservative christian Republicans win so they could stack the courts and jam their narrow minded agenda down not just this nation’s throat but the world’s throat. The Republicans are actively touting the truth as ‘fake news’ and vilifying the press or anyone for pointing out the GOP’s lies and deceptions. Take Trump’s recent Orwellian VFW speech where he told the attendees that “what you’re seeing is not what’s happening”. So, don’t trust your eyes and ears or your even your own thoughts. Believe only what Donald Trump tells you. Wow!!! A free press is vital to a functioning democratic society. But the Republicans are so hell bent on maintaining their power forever that they’re not even faking a tolerance for democracy. The GOP is going full on fascist!

We’ve commented before about Sinclair Lewis’s warning about fascism coming to America: “When fascism comes to America, it will wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.” Well, it’s here staring us right in the face. We’re basically a corporate oligarchy, a.k.a. the Holy Corporate Empire, where religion, money and big business converge and run our country with no dissent allowed. The only thing sane, educated, intelligent people are trying to do is prevent the United States from becoming an authoritarian, fascist dictatorship with an orange haired madman at the helm. We think that Republicans should review history to see what people did to fascist dictators in the past, i.e. Benito Mussolini during World War II. Our question to the GOP is this: do you really want to follow that disastrous path?

The modern day Republican party has apparently forgotten history and inexplicably wants to pursue the same disastrous path as Mussolini and his fascists did during World War II.

The modern day Republican party has apparently forgotten history and inexplicably wants to pursue the same disastrous path as Mussolini and his fascists did during World War II.

The Axis Of Vile

Once again, America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has managed to embarrass the United States on the world stage. This time, he’s pretty much admitted to treason against his country and completely submitted to Russia’s president/dictator, Vladimir Putin. In an ‘historic’ meeting with the Russian strongman, Trump called out his own country’s intelligence agencies, all of whom have come to the conclusion that Russia interfered in the 2016 elections, and yet sided with Putin. Can you imagine if conservative patron saint, St. Ronald Reagan had done something like that back in the ’80s with Mikhail Gorbachev? “The CIA says not to trust you Gorby, but I’ll give up all our nuclear weapons and you can keep yours.” Once again, electoral-vote.com provides an excellent analysis on what the hell happened in Helsinki.

Prior to the summit, or shall we say submit, Trump also called America’s European allies in the European Union ‘foes’. Last week at the NATO summit, he managed to practically withdraw the United States from the organization. Like a former Russian envoy said, “Putin has to do nothing to undermine the alliances and international institutions that helped to advance American security and prosperity for the last several decades. Trump is doing all the work for him.” WTF!!!

So what does this all mean? Are we now forming an ‘axis of vile’ against the rest of the world? Are we now in cahoots with authoritarian regimes like North Korea and Russia? Or is Trump just doing what he was supposed to do when Russia hacked the election in 2016; make Russia great again? We don’t know but we’re getting pretty sick of this shit. We think our elected officials should probably start getting off their lazy asses and aggressively pursuing removing this idiot from office before he gives Putin the keys to the White House. Either that or we guess we’d better all start learning Russian.

America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has joined a super cool new club called the Axis of Vile with his authoritarian strongmen pals Kim Jong Un of North Korea and Vlad Putin of Russia.

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has joined a super cool, new club called the Axis of Vile with his authoritarian strongmen pals Kim Jong Un of North Korea and Vlad Putin of Russia.

Trump’s New Supreme Lackey

To no one’s surprise America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, picked a right wing conservative to be his new Supreme Court justice. Super catholic, Brett Kavanaugh, would give the Court a decidedly conservative and catholic lean for the next generation.

Of course, the media pundits and supposed experts are squawking and blathering about what all this means. There’s even news that departing justice, Anthony Kennedy even hand picked his successor. Most people are speculating that Roe v. Wade will likely be overturned, thus forcing women who may want to terminate a pregnancy for health reasons into back alley abortions or to use a coat hanger just like the good old days prior to the 1970s. We guess the life of the mother isn’t important at all to supposedly pro-lifers. Talk about your compassionate christian conservatism.

But we think it’s pretty clear that Trump chose Kavanaugh, because of his supposed enlightened stance on presidential privilege. Kavanaugh was member of Ken Starr’s team that sought impeachment against Bill Clinton and said at that time that no president was above the law. But apparently the young religious zealot had an epiphany while working in the Bush White House and believes that the president is above the law, especially if he’s Republican, which comes in handy with the ongoing Russia probe. So if and when Trump is found guilty of collusion with Russia and treason, he’ll really be innocent because…you know…conservative Republicans are never wrong and should never be punished (see Watergate, Iran-Contra affair, Iraq War, etc…).

Supreme Court justice nominee, Brett Kavanaugh, proudly proclaims that America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, is above the law and cannot possibly be guilty of crimes he may have committed like collusion or treason.

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, guarantees he won’t have to go to jail by choosing right wing authoritarian and religious zealot, Brett Kavanaugh, as the new Supreme Court justice.

Coming Soon: The Aryan Bakery

There is so much crap happening every day with Donald Trump, that it’s impossible to keep up with all that is occurring. We’ve had this photo-toon almost ready to go for two weeks now but something new crap has been coming forth pushing this news to the back burner. Ahhhh! Life during the Trump administration.

The Supreme Court recently decided in favor of a baker who decided against baking a cake for a same sex customer. So this pretty much opens the door for a business to discriminate against the customer if said customer’s life style or beliefs offends the shop owner’s beliefs. Didn’t Jesus teach tolerance? Didn’t he teach against discrimination, you know – what so ever you do to the least of my brothers, that you do unto me? This action and the recent activity of separating migrant children from their parents indefinitely is just another example proving today’s so called christians are nothing but hypocrites.

But this court decision just bit the right wing in the butt because it can go both ways, too. Just last week, Chief White House Lying Liar, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, was refused service by a restaurant in Virginia because she works for Trump and was asked to leave. So what goes around comes around. If the conservative Republicans want discrimination everywhere, guess what: they’ve got it. It looks like soon we’ll have stores for certain clientele only. Unfortunately, that’s not what America is supposed to be about. One thing’s for sure: Donald Trump is most definitely not uniting this country.

In Donald Trump's America, soon straight, white, christian merchants can discriminate against anyone they please, which is a bit hypocritical from the teachings of Jesus.

In Donald Trump’s America, soon straight, white, christian merchants can discriminate against anyone they please, which is a bit hypocritical from the teachings of Jesus.

Bible Babble

The crap keeps coming at a fast and furious pace from the Trump administration, so it’s tough to keep up, folks. Among the myriad of events that occurred this past week is one where Attorney Confederate General, Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III, boldly stepped to the microphone, thumped his bible and used a bible quote to justify separating children from their parents at the border and detaining them indefinitely, just like his Confederate ancestors did with the slaves and the Nazis did with Jews and other aliens they viewed as inferior. This is not new for right wing authoritarian fascists, who are obsessed with immigrants. We did a photo-toon back in 2014 where Capitalist Jesus said ‘Let the Children Suffer’ which covers the hypocrisy of the christian right wing. Electoral-vote.com provided an excellent analysis of the whole disgusting affair that covers all the bases very well, so we won’t rehash it here.

What we’ll focus on is why a United States lawmaker is using bible quotes for justifying law in 21st century America. Like the electoral-vote post says, when people quote the bible for justifying something, inevitably it devolves into just another game of dueling scripture. Why do we still give credence to text written by early Iron Age or even late Bronze Age ‘wisemen’ who, compared with today’s knowledge base, knew absolutely nothing about the world or the universe as it really is. We’ve mentioned before about how a person who accepts science is much more knowledgeable about everything because the science enthusiast accesses a much bigger database of knowledge than a religious person, who is obsessed with connecting to an antiquated and relatively small database. This latest example just shows that if the bible says that we should separate children from their parents for an indefinite period, then maybe the bible isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Maybe we should probably be using some updated source of wisdom to help us make decisions in the 21st century and beyond.

Attorney Confederate General, Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III justifies separating children from parents by thumping his bible.

Attorney Confederate General, Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III, lamely explains why separating children from parents for an indefinite period is right in line with the bible, which for some reason is now being used as the law of the United States.

The G7 Nadir

Once again, America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has embarrassed America on the world stage; this time at the recent G7 summit conference in Quebec, Canada. In one weekend, Trump managed to insult our trusted allies and at the same time strengthen support for his old pal Vlad Putin in Russia. He vilified Canada…that’s right, Canada… and their leader Justin Trudeau for talking back to the U.S. because of Trump’s recent decision to increase tariffs. Seriously, folks; Trump was all kind of crazy with his statements. German chancellor, Angela Merkel, was equally distressed about the experience. The summit made it clear to the world that Trump exists to make Russia great again.

That’s right, folks. Trump was all love when it came to talking up Russia and trying to get them readmitted to the summit meetings, thus making them the G8 again. But the reason Russia was dismissed from the group in the first place was because they invaded the Ukraine and annexed Crimea. But of course, Trump didn’t even mention this is his commentary. Why? Russia must really have something on Trump for him to blow off our old allies like France, Germany, Britain, Japan, Italy and Canada – you know, democracies – and embrace authoritarian countries like Russia and now North Korea. We’re thinking future economic conferences will very soon be called the G6 summit with Trump deciding that the United States is going to take its ball and go home because it has to play nice with other countries.

One thing that we like from the conference was that Trudeau massively trolled Trump by giving him a framed picture of a hotel in Canada that was run by Trump’s grandfather. It turns out the hotel was a brothel. Yes, the lust for vamps is in Trump’s genes.

We also love the viral photo from the conference which shows what a petulant man-child Trump really is. If clearly shows that if he doesn’t get his way, then he acts like a complete crybaby. We’ve decided to speculate that the picture was taken while ordering some vittles.

When confronted with the choice of pepperoni and mushrooms on his pizza, American CEO/Dictator and petulant man-child Donald Trump courageously threatens to leave the G7 summit, if he can't have a cheeseburger.

In true Trumpian fashion, America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man-child, Donald Trump, makes a valiant, cross-armed stand for American values at the recent G7 summit.

The Lying Liar’s Pity Party

The Trump administration’s lackeys continue to annoy the American populace on a daily basis. Take Sarah Huckabee Sanders…please. She keeps complaining about how the press is unfairly spreading ‘fake news’. We’ve already commented about how this bible thumper has been repeatedly bearing false witness in front of the nation despite her religion teaching its followers that lying will lead to eternal damnation.

Now Ms. Sanders is whining about how the press calling her a liar is making her feel bad. Oh really???!!! Poor baby!!! And Ms. Sanders’ daily lies don’t make us feel miserable???!!! It’s truly astonishing that the gaslighting Republicans think that many Americans, including the press, can’t discern the truth that Trump and his entire administration are nothing but pathological liars. We’ve already mentioned the database of Trump’s lies being kept by the Washington Post’s Fact Checker. There’s also overwhelming video evidence of him lying!!! Just check Youtube! Of course, Trump and the Republicans have some help spreading their deceptions with their very own propaganda network, a.k.a. Fox News, which many of the christian sheeple follow without question, like the good little authoritarian automatons they are.

But as for Sarah Huckabee Sanders: we have no sympathy whatsoever for this women. She is nothing but a gargantuan hypocrite. Want to stop feeling bad, Ms. Sanders? Stop lying!!!

Trump administration Press Secretary and pathological prevaricator, Sarah Huckabee Sanders whines about being called a liar, to which a friendly doctor advises her to stop lying.

A kindly doctor provides some friendly advice for whiny Trump administration Press Secretary and pathological prevaricator, Sarah Huckabee Sanders: STOP LYING!!!

The King And Queen Of Pain

Gina Haspel was narrowly approved by the Senate last week to be the new CIA director despite being grilled for being a supposed proponent of torture during the Bush Administration. Lawmakers repeatedly asked her if she would protest if perhaps Trump wanted to restart interrogation techniques such as waterboarding to which she basically did what all conservative Republicans do; avoid answering the question. You know it’s bad when Dick Cheney reemerges from his lair and states with Haspel in charge, the U.S. should restart harsh interrogations.

Of course, the Trump administration denies that Trump wants to resume the torture program, despite stating many times that he would definitely reinstate the method because “it works”. Perhaps Haspel can initiate a new torture method involving spanking with a Forbes magazine. We’re sure our megalomaniac, liar-in-chief would volunteer for that and maybe confess everything about lying on his taxes, his affair with Stormy Daniels, any collusion with Russia and the 3001 other deceptions he’s thrown at the public since his inauguration.

New CIA director and torture aficionado, Gina Haspel, has announced a new method of interrogation that meets with overwhelming approval from American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump.

New CIA director and torture aficionado, Gina Haspel, has announced a new method of interrogation that meets with overwhelming approval from American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump.