Archive for America’s CEO/Dictator

Wagging The Rapture Dog

The news is out that the Democrats are pushing for Robert Mueller to testify before Congress and the Trump administration and Republicans are not happy about that. Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell tried using Jedi mind tricks in the Senate by repeatedly uttering “Case closed….Case closed.” And of course, America’s CEO/Dictator and delusional man child, Donald Trump, continued his pathological prevaricating on Twitter and on his right wing echo chamber Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network. But there were some other disturbing developments on the international front that show that the Republicans might take an insane, catastrophic step in order to protect Trump from the fallout of Mueller testifying.

The United States has sent warships to the Gulf of Hormuz in response to ‘troubling’ actions by Iranians. National Security Advisor, war hawk and failed walrus impersonator John Bolton, has been beating the drums for war with Iran since the days of the Iraq War clusterf*ck, which Bolton still thinks was the right call. Now the delusional Bolton thinks starting another war in the Middle East would be another smashing idea and we’re sure the defense corporations are champing at the bit for a new avenue for profit. Therefore, Bolton and Trump are trying to create a Gulf of Tonkin incident so they can start a war with Iran.

Secretary of State Mike Pompeo also seems to be supporting the idea of war with Iran but for a different reason. Pompeo is one of those looniest of loony evangelical christians called a rapturist. In the warped mind of these nutbags, the end times are a-coming which means that all good christians will be slurped up to heaven while the rest of us ‘heathens’ will be left to toil on Earth. One of the pre-cursors for the end times, according to ‘biblical scripture’, is that Jerusalem is recognized as the capital of Israel, which Donald Trump did last year. Now, according to the end times mythology, a great war will occur and Jesus Christ will come again which will facilitate the ‘rapture’. Many prominent Republicans are rapturists including Pompeo, VP Puritan Mike Pence, former Teabagger darling Sarah ‘Ubetcha’ Palin, former Attorney Confederate General Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III, housing secretary Ben ‘Mr. Sandman’ Carson and energy secretary and brain fart expert Rick Perry. So, with a normal, logical, reasonable Secretary of State, war is usually and wisely avoided. But with this evangelical loon, conditions are being forced that would result in a catastrophic conflict in the Middle East. This would mean that biblical prophecy would be ‘proven’ correct and all the ‘good people’ (christians) will get their just desserts in heaven and all the bad people (the rest of us) will suffer in lakes of fire here on Earth.

Of course, these wack jobs fail to consider that the people who wrote the bible lived two thousand years ago and didn’t know jack about the Earth or the universe. We’ve mentioned before that religious people connect to a tiny bronze age database while scientific people connect to a colossal, 21st century database chock full of knowledge. We’ve gained so much knowledge about everything in the last four hundred years. To ignore science, scientific inquiry and scientific methods is sheer lunacy and any person advocating radical ideology based on two thousand year old babble shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near the corridors of power in this country. We guarantee to all those rapture loonies that unless you’re vaporized by a nuclear blast you’ll still be here left to toil on the Earth with the rest of us.

To distract from the possible testifying of Robet Mueller before Congress, American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump has decided to 'wag the dog' with multiple wars much to the delight of National Security Advisor and war monger extraordinaire John Bolton and Secretary of State and Rapture aficionado Mike Pompeo.
To distract from the possible testifying of Robet Mueller before Congress, American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump has decided to ‘wag the dog’ with multiple wars much to the delight of National Security Advisor and war monger extraordinaire John Bolton and Secretary of State and Rapture aficionado Mike Pompeo.

Sinking The Middle Class

The news is out on the Trump’s tax cuts and…surprise, surprise – refunds for the middle class are down and it appears the tax cuts only benefited the top 1% percent of Americans. But how can this be? American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump promised that every one would benefit. Could it be that Trump lied? Given that he’s gone over the 10, 000 lie mark just over two years into his presidency, YES, OF COURSE HE LIED!!!

We’ve commented before about how poor people view themselves as temporarily embarrasses millionaires and are cajoled into voting against their own self-interests by right wing propagandists, like Fox News, blaming everyone else but the real culprits (plutocratic capitalists) for their conditions. The scapegoats are always the same: minorities, people of color and people of different religions other than christianity – you know, people who are ‘different’. So these right wing, racist, conservative christians, although they are in the same boat financially as blacks, hispanics, other non-whites, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists and atheists, will support politicians who create laws and policies that decimate the middle class and make their own lives even tougher. For example, the Trump administration has destroyed consumer protection regulations which make it harder for Americans to stand up for their rights and easier for corporations to do whatever the hell they want with no repercussions. With higher insurance premiums and no voice to change them, we’re all getting screwed. But it doesn’t matter to the racist Trump supporters, because at least non-whites are not becoming better off than them. So much winning. . . for corporations and plutocrats!

Trump supporters, despite being in the same boat financially as non-whites, amazingly vote against their own self interest for Republican lackeys who adopt laws and policies which reward plutocrats handsomely while simultaneously sinking the middle class.
Trump supporters, despite being in the same boat financially as non-whites, amazingly vote against their own self interest for Republican lackeys who adopt laws and policies which reward plutocrats handsomely while simultaneously sinking the middle class.

Don Quixote Trump

America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and the Republicans have had an absolute conniption fit recently over the Green New Deal and it’s main proponent, freshman congressperson from New York Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC). Last week Don Quixote Trump attacked windmills because…you know…noise from the evil windmills causes cancer and kills birds and stuff. He even did some windmill impersonations at one of his authoritarian ‘Nuremberg’ rallies last week. But let’s face it folks; the only birdies Trump cares about are the ones he’d wish he could get on the golf course because according to sources, he cheats a lot.

So why are the Republicans throwing hissy fits and temper tantrums over AOC and her bold environmental plan? Because the Republicans are lackeys for the fossil fuel industries: coal, oil, gas and mining. These corporations, who don’t give a rat’s patoot about the environment only want to continue their profitable ride on the gravy train. Their industries have been undisputed kings of the world since the late 19th century. They’ve got money and power and they’ll be damned if they’re going to lose their empire to clean renewable energy. That’s why the appointment of former fossil fuel industry lobbyist Andrew Wheeler as head of the EPA has been greeted so favorably by the smokestack and tailpipe suckers; he’s one of them. It’s like putting the fox in charge of the hen house. In short; the chickens(us) are doomed. Hence, all the attacks on AOC and the Green New Deal.

We have no doubt that the kingpins of pollution and environmental destruction will promote Trump as a noble capitalist on a quixotic quest to rid the world of these horrible, energy efficient, evil, killer windmills and their dastardly queen, AOC. It fits right in with the insane, right wing narrative that Trump is somehow making America great again. Perhaps a movie is forthcoming? We present below what that blockbuster may look like.

Don Quixote Trump: The fossil fuel companies send noble capitalist and stable genius Donald Trump on a quest to save their dying, inefficient industries. Trump, together with his EPA stooge Sancho Scienza (played by Andew Wheeler) and God (played by Mike Pence) battle the Evil Windmill Queen (played by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez) and try to destroy her vast, horrible, energy efficient windmill army. Rated R for Regressive.

Don Quixote Trump: The fossil fuel companies send noble capitalist and stable genius Donald Trump on a quest to save their dying, inefficient industries. Trump, together with his EPA stooge Sancho Scienza (played by Andew Wheeler) and God (played by Mike Pence) battle the Evil Windmill Queen (played by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez) and try to destroy her vast, horrible, energy efficient windmill army. Rated R for Regressive.

The Indictment Score: Benghazi 0, Mueller 37

The fallout from the release of the Mueller report (or should we say, Bill Barr’s Cliff’s notes of the Mueller report) continues and more and more questions have arisen. The majority of Americans want the entire report released, not the redacted ‘yada, yada, yada’ version offered by Attorney General and Republican obfuscator Bill Barr. The ‘journalists’ at Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, have been screaming their heads off about how other ‘fake news’ media should be apologizing for their treatment of the president. And of course, America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump has been his usual obnoxious self, proclaiming that everyone who said that there was collusion, especially the MSM or the ‘enemy of the people’, be fired or worse. Furthermore, the fine, right wing propagandists at Fox are clamoring for retaliatory investigations directed at Trump’s enemies.

As usual, conservative Republicans have a very short memory. Did they forget already about the Benghazi hearings which lasted two years and produced zero indictments; the very definition of a witch hunt. And conservative Republicans never apologized once for their treatment of Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama for that matter. Like we said on our previous post, the Mueller investigation was hardly a ‘witch hunt’ as it produced 37 indictments.  Because Barr has been so secretive about the report, of course the public is wondering what it really says, especially when even in Barr’s summary ‘fer idjits’  – “While this report does not conclude that the President committed a crime, it also does not exonerate him.” – , Trump clearly wasn’t exonerated on the charge of obstruction of justice, which was the most likely offense that would have resulted from the investigation anyway.

So, in a nutshell: Benghazi, 2 years – 0 indictments; Mueller investigation, 2 years – 37 indictments.

Republicans can STFU!!! 

The indictment scoreboard: Benghazi investigation - 0; Mueller 'witch hunt' investigation - 37.

The indictment scoreboard: Benghazi investigation – 0; Mueller ‘witch hunt’ investigation – 37.

America. Got. Played.

Well, the big news this past weekend was the release of the Mueller report. And the news was…disappointing to say the least. We here at the Bucket, like the rest of America, bought into the narrative pushed by the corporate main stream media that Robert Mueller was this grand bastion of unimpeachable integrity. He did produce 37 indictments(34 people, 3 companies) including six former Trump advisers. This and the evidence provided by the media painted a pretty convincing picture that showed Trump and his associates did something wrong. Why did he and his subordinates lie constantly about their Russian connections if they were so innocent? Why has Trump never criticized Putin and has just about glorified him every chance he gets? Trump threatened Comey repeatedly in his tweets and claimed in videos that he fired James Comey because he didn’t want to be investigated about Russia. How many countless times did Trump threaten to end the Mueller investigation?  But after two years, Mueller claims he didn’t have enough evidence of obstruction of justice but couldn’t exonerate him either. America witnessed the obstruction of justice first hand! What a bunch of bullshit!

Now Bill Barr claims that “there’s nothing to see here, folks” despite two years of investigation and 37 indictments and that we should just trust his biased opinion. Let’s face it folks, Bill Barr is nothing but a Republican hatchet man and crime obfuscator. He was brought in to kill the investigation like he did with Iran/Contra and that’s what he’s trying to do right now.  America is for the people, by the people. If the FBI spent two years of the tax payers money running an investigation, then the American people have a right to see ALL of that report. Remember, how the Republicans pulled a Benghazi witch hunt on Hillary Clinton for two years and the result was zero indictments, no evidence of wrongdoing. And Republicans cried and used Benghazi to slander Clinton and Obama to win the 2014 midterms and 2016 elections. But the Mueller investigation wasn’t a witch hunt, because there has been – let us repeat – 37 indictments including several people closely associated with Donald Trump. Stephen Colbert did a brilliant assessment Monday night. Trump is still under investigation for a boatload of other things and despite Trump’s gloating, he is far from the innocent victim he proclaims himself to be.

Now, because the corporate main stream media has given constant coverage of Donald Trump and the Mueller report and all things Republican for the last three years (hell… the last twenty years), the orange haired man child just may win re-election in 2020. It’s now plainly obvious the fix has been in for the last three years. America got played! And now with Trump supposedly ‘cleared of any wrongdoing’, his knuckle dragging, racist, right wing authoritarian loving supporters will become even more emboldened. We’ve been waiting for Trump militias to form and now maybe they will with the help of Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network. Trump certainly indicated that recently with his mention that his supporters may have to get tough with Democrats. We’ve learned many things about Trump since his rise to national prominence the last twenty years and especially since he’s become president and one of the most glaring is that if you give him an inch, he will take a hundred miles.

This whole affair stinks to high heaven. We’ve lost a little respect for Mr. Mueller and have completely lost faith in the American justice system. One thing is for sure: the leadership in this country is jam packed with wealthy, white, entitled good ol’ boys who want to stay in power no matter what and they’ll do anything to preserve their hegemony. It’s all bullshit. The media, the plutocrats, the Republicans and even some of the Democrats are playing the American people for fun and profit. They don’t give a shit about real Americans, the people of the 99%.

So what should we do? Keep on fighting. It’s springtime so that means there will be good weather ahead. Maybe groups of Americans can march peacefully on Washington repeatedly over the next six months and remind these blowhards what by the people, for the people really means.

America's CEO/Dictator and 'completely exonerated' Donald Trump proudly proclaims his godliness to the masses while Attorney General and Republican crime obfuscator Bill Barr and former defender of democracy Robert Mueller passively look on.

America’s CEO/Dictator and ‘completely exonerated’ Donald Trump proudly proclaims his godliness to the masses while Attorney General and Republican crime obfuscator Bill Barr and former defender of democracy Robert Mueller passively look on.

And Now, For Our Next Fake Emergency…

American CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, upset that he didn’t get all the money he wanted for his precious, unnecessary border wall, pulled a trick out his authoritarian dictator hat and declared a national emergency for a border crisis that doesn’t exist and which most sane Americans agree is bogus. According the 1975 National Emergencies Act, the president can declare a national emergency, but the specific emergency powers must be outlined and declared first. Some examples of national emergencies declared by other presidents include the 9/11 attacks (under Dubya), the Iran hostage crisis (Carter) or the 2009 H1N1 flu pandemic (Obama). All these seem to be legitimate declarations. But legitimacy doesn’t matter to our orange-haired, megalomaniac man child who pretends to be the President of the United States. He’s drunk with power and he wants to flaunt it like any other dictator in the world. And true to form, feckless Republicans like Lindsey Graham lined up to support Trump.

Fortunately for democracy, a bipartisan group of 58 former national security officials have decided to stand up to Trump and declare that “there is no factual basis” for his emergency. Hopefully, the slew of lawsuits being filed will also stop this nonsense.  If Trump gets away with this, then he will no doubt declare other fake national emergencies as well in the future. We wonder what the next ‘crisis’ declaration will be by Trumpty Dumpty in order to get what he wants.

American CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, declares a national emergency so that the McRib becomes permanent, to which sycophant Lindsey Graham wholeheartedly approves and Mitch 'Turtle Boy' McConnell cowers in his shell.

Spineless sycophant Lindsey Graham fecklessly supports any crisis, real or imagined, that American CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, comes up with, while Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell cowers in his shell.

Hamberder Heaven

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, recently make a big deal that the Clemson national championship football team was making a visit to the White House. So did billionaire Trump break out the bucks to entertain these athletic lads with a fine dining experience? In true Trumpian fashion, he treated them to piles and piles of hamburgers and other junk foods from fast food chains. We guess he just assumed that since he loves this crap, everybody else must do it as well.

Trump also glaringly lied about the numbers served saying one time 300 hamburgers were served. Then he tweeted hilariously that a 1000 ‘hamberders’ were served.  So if Trump isn’t lying, he’s misspelling…hugely. There’s that old adage that says “You are what you eat.” Well apparently, Trump is a pile of junk food.

America's CEO/Dictator and junk food and 'hamberder' aficionado, Donald Trump, proves that you are what you eat.

America’s CEO/Dictator and junk food and ‘hamberder’ aficionado, Donald Trump, proves that you are what you eat.

Trump’s New Babysitter

Chief of Staff John Kelly has announced that he is leaving the clusterf*ck that is the Trump administration by January 2nd, 2019. This has brought about another crisis for America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, who hasn’t been able to find anyone who wants the job. Nick Ayers, Mike Pence’s chief of staff, was considered first but he declined. Other names floated around were Trump’s Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin, Trump’s son-in-law Jared Kushner and his own daughter Ivanka. Not even colossal sycophant Chris ‘Suckinupagus’ Christie wants this lousy job.

Enter OMB director, carnival barker and corporate lackey, Mick Mulvaney, who has been named interim chief by Trump. The Mickster has shown shameless shilling skills for the moneyed elite in the past, so he’s comfortable dealing with spoiled rich plutocrats who want to have their way at any and all costs. Mulvaney is such a hypocrite he called Trump a ‘terrible human being’ just days before the 2016 election, but yet he’s decided now to take the position. But the honeymoon is over before it started for Mulvaney as Trump has already voiced complaints about him because of the video. Yes, we’re thinking that Mulvaney could be gone before 2019 even gets started.

OMB director, carnival barker and corporate lackey, Mick Mulvaney, shows what a hypocritical twit he is by becoming America's CEO/Dicator Donald Trump's new Chief of Staff/babysitter.

OMB director, carnival barker and corporate lackey, Mick Mulvaney, has been named the new Chief of Staff/babysitter for America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant child, Donald Trump.

Oval Office Follies

The big story this week was the Oval Office budget meeting between America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence and Democratic House and Senate leaders Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer. We’ve had our doubts about both Pelosi and Schumer because they’re both corporatists who do their fair share of cozying up to moneyed interests and they’ve shown in the past a willingness to cave in a little too quickly to Republican demands (like many other Democrats have done in the past twenty years, i.e. the Iraq War, Patriot Act, etc…).

But we’ve got to admit that we like what we saw from Pelosi and Schumer. They made Trump look like a buffoon by getting him to take ownership of any looming government shutdown on video for the whole country to see. Meanwhile, Mike Pence sat like a bump on a log in his chair, doing absolutely zilch, zippo, nada, bupkis, diddly-squat. We love all the Pence memes that are making the rounds this past week. We like that comment that he looked like he was at a strip club. Yes, America… if Trump is impeached, then we’ll be in the stoic, ultra-conservative hands of Puritan Pence, which gives no sane person in America a warm fuzzy.

In a recent Oval Office budget meeting with Democratic House leader Nancy Pelosi, Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence tries to keep his thoughts pure while America's CEO/Dictator Donald Trump tries to keep his thoughts empty.

America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence use impressive conservative skills to outmaneuver Democratic House leader Nancy Pelosi in a recent Oval Office budget meeting.

Blood Red Xmas Trees

While America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, continues to receive bad news about the Mueller investigation, he’s basically swept the murder of journalist Jamal Khashoggi under the carpet instead of confronting his new best friend, authoritarian Saudi Crown Prince, Mohammed bin Salman. The Senate is currently trying to put together a bipartisan bill to force sanctions on Saudi Arabia. Will they be able to do it? Pardon our skepticism but considering their past performance these past two years, probably not.

Meanwhile, Melania Trump has received some ‘attention’ concerning her unusual red xmas trees decorating the White House. We think that maybe its an homage to the Donald’s new friendship with the Saudis…you know…blood red xmas trees with bone saw ornaments. Like Melania says, “Be best, darlink.”

The Trumps reveal their artistic blood red christmas trees with innovative bone saw ornaments in honor of their authoritarian friends in Saudi Arabia.

The Trumps reveal their artistic blood red christmas trees with innovative bone saw ornaments in honor of their authoritarian friends in Saudi Arabia.