Archive for Con-a-thon 2016

TPing The World

The CIA has come out recently with evidence of Russia hacking the recent election in hopes of putting Donald Trump in the White House and the FBI has backed it up. It looks like even some Republicans are upset about the possible meddling of a foreign country in the American electoral process. Are these Republicans, like John McCain and Lindsay Graham, really upset, or are they just making it look good before the upcoming complete seizure of power that the conservative Republicans will inflict on this country one Trump is sworn in? Look at the headlines. This story should be the top story every second of the day and yet it’s already being relegated to the back burner by many main stream outlets. (Go to news.google.com and take a look.) If the situation was reversed and some foreign country had helped Hillary win, you know the conservative Republicans would be crying not stop and there would be non stop coverage.

Yes, American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and his pal, Russian dictator, Vladimir Putin will almost certainly construct a new world order which will  bring unimaginable wealth for the corporate benefactors of both sides (mostly oil and defense industries) and make the rest of the world fear for their very existence. Hey the Cold War was good for business: at least those businesses related to defense and security. One thing will be for sure: citizens of this planet will have to do what Russia and the United States want or face the dire consequences. Let’s face it folks, planet Earth is screwed.

Bend over world, here come Trump and Putin.

With the forthcoming Trump-Putin new world order, the denizens of planet Earth appear to be royally screwed.

 

McConnell’s Treasonous Turtle Act

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell pulled his patented turtle act again for Con-a-thon 2016. It was recently revealed that McConnell knew about the Russians hacking the election but decided to keep quiet about it. Wow! What integrity! A foreign, hostile government hacked the U.S. elections and he wanted to keep it quiet because it benefited his party. A man like that should be shoveling elephant manure in a circus. Wait a second…that’s what he already does.

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, a.k.a 'The Turtle', boldly performs his turtle act and allows a foreign, hostile government to hack the U.S. elections allowing his fellow Republicans to commit treason and take complete control of the government.

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, a.k.a ‘The Turtle’, boldly performs his turtle act and allows a foreign, hostile government to hack the U.S. elections allowing his fellow Republicans to commit treason and take complete control of the government.

The Master Bait And Switcher

One of the most astonishing things about Con-a-thon 2016 that we just can’t believe was that so many old, white Teabagger patriots voted for Donald Trump and voted to keep a Republican majority in Congress. Although he claims that he won’t cut Social Security and Medicare (like we can believe anything he says) conservative Republicans have wanted to cut Social Security and Medicare since their inception and privatize everything. In ‘bidness’ terms, it’s called the old bait and switch. Yes, CONservative Republicans ‘compassionately’ want humans to suffer and die in horrible ways in their old age like in the good old days before the Great Depression when robber barons could work you more than eight hours a day, often for seven days a week and children didn’t waste precious energy playing, they worked for pennies a day. Does anybody honestly think Donald Trump would side with poor people instead of his fellow billionaires? It’s all about greed and making more money, more money, MORE MONEY.  He’s already stocking his cabinet with billionaires and corporatists. Why would so many low income people vote against their own interests and elect someone who will destroy their lives by getting rid of their safety net that enables them to live? Oh yeah…that’s right…Hillary Clinton used a private email server like Colin Powell, Condoleezza Rice and the George W. Bush White House did.

Master bait and switcher and American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump vows to cut Social Security and Medicare to get those lazy mooching freeloading Senior Citizens back to work.

Older Teabagger patriots are experiencing a bit of regret about casting their vote for master bait and switcher and new American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump

Election Truth: 54% Of Americans Don’t Want Trump As President

We’re back from our break from Con-a-thon 2016 and like most other sane Americans, we’re slowly coming to grips with the agonizing truth that Donald Trump will be this nation’s 45th President.

But votes are still rolling in and Hillary Clinton keeps adding to her popular vote lead which makes Trump’s ‘victory’ more illegitimate. As of today, Clinton has 65,224,885 votes to Trump’s 62,679,299 (a difference of 2,545,586.) The truth from this election is if you include the votes for the third party candidates, an overwhelming majority of 54% of Americans don’t want Trump to be President. And this doesn’t even include the voters that were successfully suppressed from voting by changes in the Voters Rights act. Green Party candidate Jill Stein is pushing for recounts in Wisconsin, Michigan and Pennsylvania and the Clinton campaign is joining in in Wisconsin. What’s interesting is that errors have been found in all three states where Trump got votes he shouldn’t have. Did something fishy occur in these three battleground states that should have gone easily to Clinton? Was the fix in? We’re not sure but we recall now that just after James Comey did his bit of election rigging, certain media outlets were commenting that Trump had a path to victory that included those three states that according to polls, were strongly favoring Clinton. Generally we’re not confident at all that anything will come of this effort at getting a recount. But we do find it interesting that despite winning, Trump is claiming election fraud, stating erroneously that millions of illegal voters voted which means in that in his mind, he actually won the popular vote. Maybe he’ll agree to a nation wide recount, especially in swing states, under the watchful eye of a majority of citizenry who don’t want him to be President.  Hey…we can hope can’t we.

Despite winning the election, American CEO/Dictator and massive egotist, Donald Trump, is so steamed that he didn't win the popular vote that he has demanded a recount, much to the delight of Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton.

Despite winning the election, American CEO/Dictator and massive egotist, Donald Trump, is so steamed that he didn’t win the popular vote that he has demanded a recount, much to the delight of Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton.

Con Artists Revealed

We’re still coming to grips with this election but the initial shock is worn off. While it was pretty much a disaster for sanity, science and intelligent people everywhere, there were some minor victories, especially here in Arizona. While grouchy curmudgeon John McCain unfortunately retained his seat, there were some good things happening: Democrats made pickups in the Arizona House and Senate; Democrats maintained their seats in the U.S. House of Representatives; there was an increase in the minimum wage; one of the people responsible for the March primary debacle, Helen Purcell, was voted out of office; and perhaps the biggest news was that Maricopa County Sheriff Joe ‘Just Call Me God’ Arpaio will finally be riding off into the Sunset after being defeated by Paul Penzone.

But several interesting and revealing things are happening in the post-election trauma. We’ll address just one in this post and that is the stock market has taken off with Donald Trump taking office. Initially, stocks plunged worldwide and people around the world started to freak out. But the United States stock market stabilized quickly…almost too quickly. That quick recovery and the fact that it’s taken off since then speaks volumes. The sectors soaring are dirty energy companies (coal, oil, gas), pharmaceuticals and banking and financial services.This pretty much confirms what we’ve known all along; America is no longer a democracy, it’s a corporate oligarchy. As long as the President (even if it was Clinton) is friendly to Corporate America and Wall Street has it’s money, then all is fine. The stock market hangs over America’s head like a Damocles sword: Please Wall Street and its investors or else!

This is where the con comes in. Although Trump claimed to be on the side of the little guy, he is a big time supporter of corporatism. He loves money and other people with money…and that doesn’t mean most of us in the middle and lower classes. In any given conflict between corporate America and individuals, Trump will side with corporate America every time. Trump is a plutocrat! Red state Americans have been royally conned! Unfortunately, Trump voters won’t realize they’ve been screwed until after Social Security and Medicare have been taken away (the Republicans have wanted SS repealed since World War II) or they’re paying higher prices for prescription drugs because protective consumer regulations have been stripped (good times coming for the Pharma bros) or they don’t receive assistance after a natural disaster ripped up their property because the austerity crazed Republican government doesn’t want to spend money to bail them out (remember Hurricane Katrina). But then they’ll probably blame it on the Democrats, who instituted these safety net programs and protective regulations in the first place, because Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network and our new CEO/Dictator Trump tell them it is so.

Fasten your seatbelts America…it’s going to be a bumpy and nauseating ride.

New American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump celebrates his massive job of con artistry on the American people with one of his fellow plutocrats.

New American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump celebrates his massive job of con artistry on the American people with one of his fellow plutocrats.

Rewind: America Chooses Insanity…Again

We’re shocked and in mourning for a sane, intelligent America. Words escape us at the moment so we’re reprinting an article from when America chose a similar path of insanity back in 2004 and re-elected George W. Bush. Yeah…that turned out well didn’t it. One things for sure; conservative Republicans never learn.

This article is from our November 7, 2004 post-election issue.

America Speaks: “51% Of Us Are Fucking Idiots!”

America went to the polls last week and re-elected George W. Bush as president even though he’s started a costly war on false premises with no exit strategy, plunged the nation into tumultuous debt, rolled back numerous environmental regulations in favor of industry, presided over an economy that has lost almost a million jobs, underfunded the ‘No Children Left Behind’ program, misled the nation about the cost of his healthcare bill which does nothing to alleviate high costs and performed anemically in all three televised debates.

Bush supporters spoke out and explained why they voted for him. Dale Gilman of Empty Noggin, Georgia, said, “I voted for him because he’s the one I’d rather drink a beer with. That’s my only criteria for president. I’ll have to invite him over to my trailer for a beer one of these days. It’s not quite the country club he’s used to, but I think my gun collection adds a certain redneck ambiance.”

Betsy Moeller, of Cornshoot, Ohio, said, “I was undecided until the very end, but what made me vote for the President was that he’s just so moral. Even when he lies to us repeatedly, he’s just so moral.”

Kirby Tucker, of Cracked Nut, North Carolina, said, “All I knows is I don’t want no wolves to catch me and eats me.”

Durwood Dunndoody, of Oozing Bed Sore, Texas said, “The big issue of this campaign was gay marriage. No doubt about it. Thank God, the President is going to make a stand agin’ those hell bound fruitcakes. They’re worst than the terrorists you know.”

Dwight Stevenson, of Ostrich Neck, Oklahoma, said, “I know the president has made some mistakes, but he’s a known quantity. I’m comfortable with his ineptitude.”

Rev. Fred Campbell, pastor of the Fifth Evangelical Church of the Backwoods in Dunceville, Tennessee, said, “Praise be to God! The rapture is so close I can smell it!”

Dave and Karen Lydell, of Dullardton, Iowa, said, “We believe in secretive Orwellian government. We completely trust President Bush to do what’s right, because it’s really none of our business to know or question what they’re doing. We don’t mind if our government monitors our every movement. It’s a small price to pay for freedom.”

Kerry supporters expressed extreme shock and disappointment. Mark Barry, of Tempe, Arizona, said while banging his head with a frying pan, “This can’t be happening! This can’t be happening!”

Donna Beacham, of Salem, Oregon, said while booking a flight to Vancouver, Canada, “The choice was so obvious. It’s like we’re speeding for the edge of a cliff in a gas guzzling hummer, and the passengers vote to drive off. Un-fucking-believable!”

College student, Craig Kaster, of Santa Bonita, California, said, “I’m so voting for that Kerry dude. What? The elections were last week. Oh man! I like so spaced that off.”

Al-Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden, said. “This is great! Al-Qaeda will get stronger, America will go bankrupt and I’ll get to live four more years. That chimp Bush is playing right into my hands. Allah Akbar!”

Much Ado About Nothing

As most sane people figured, the FBI’s reopening of the investigation of Hillary Clinton’s emails produced no new results. But at least both Republicans and Democrats seem to agree on one thing: FBI director James Comey will probably be out of a job real soon.

Tuesday is election day America. GO VOTE!!!

Democrat Hillary Clinton and Republican Donald Trump tell FBI director James Comey "You're fired!"

On the eve of the election, Republicans and Democrats have finally found something upon which they can agree.

Rig-or Trump-us

Donald Trump has been claiming the whole summer with his pals from Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, that the election will be rigged. Republicans have claimed that voter fraud is rampant despite statistics showing that it is virtually non-existent. This is of course to obfuscate the voter suppression that is occurring at state level by the Republicans. This should be no surprise because ever since the Reagan years, Republicans have been claiming to be something they’re not. They claim to want government out of your lives, but approve of government controlling a woman’s uterus and warrantless wiretapping. They claim to want small government but government has grown incredibly under Republican regimes. They claim to be ‘compassionate’ conservatives, and yet they don’t want healthcare for everyone and want to eliminate Medicare and Social Security. The list goes on and on. So basically when a Republican claims that Democrats are rigging the election, you can pretty well bet that the Republicans are working on rigging the election.

So what happened this past week: a Trump supporter was arrested in Iowa for voting twice. Yes, Donald Trump predicted voter fraud and his supporters are making damn sure his prediction comes true.

A Trump supporter proudly boasts that his idol's predictions of a rigged election will come true.

A Trump supporter proudly boasts that his idol’s predictions of a rigged election will come true.

Republicans: Making Russia Great Again

Several incredibly disturbing items of information have come to light since FBI director James Comey decided to make this farce of an election called Con-a-thon 2016 more excruciating last Friday.

First of all, this may be all to do about nothing. In clarifying his purpose, Comey stated that he said they may be a connection with Anthony Weiner’s email to Clinton, not that there was. And since there are over 600,000 emails to process, a solid answer won’t be known until after the election.  The DOJ has already filed a complaint against Comey and several former Attorney Generals, including former Bush lackey, Alberto Gonzales,  have stepped forward and accused Comey of wrongdoing. Well, how convenient Mr. James Comey! You don’t know for sure, but you thought you’d give into the Republican pressure and throw some kerosene on the fire.

Second of all, information has leaked about a possible computer connection between Donald Trump and Russia. Much has been made about the bromance between Trump and Russian leader, Vladimir Putin. Trump and many top Republicans have even stated that Putin is a stronger leader than Obama, completely ignoring the fact that Putin is an authoritarian dictator, which speaks volumes about the mindset of the current Teabagger Republicans.

Which brings us back to James Comey. Comey has said that he doesn’t believe there’s a connection between Trump and Russia and didn’t want to pursue the matter before the election. But yet, he was perfectly fine with bringing up the remote possibility of finding a connection between Weiner and Hillary Clinton before the election. We think your partisanship is showing Mr. Comey. We also think maybe unemployment may be an option in your immediate future.

And for all those Republicans who think Vladimir Putin is so great…MOVE TO RUSSIA!!!

Vladimir Putin welcomes Republicans to Russia and initiates them to Putin style freedom of speech and press.

Russian leader, Vladimir Putin, welcomes with pointed AK-47, all Republicans who admire his ‘democratic’ style.

Comey’s October Surprise

Just when you thought the possibility of a Trumpocalypse was over and you could breath safely…

FBI Director and one tall dude(6’8″), James Comey, decided Friday that Americans weren’t stressed out enough about the elections and decided to throw some raw meat to Donald Trump’s drooling thugs. Comey, a lifelong Republican, decided to conveniently re-open the email investigations with a little more than a week left until the election. This investigation doesn’t concern emails on Hillary’s server, but emails pertaining to Anthony Weiner. Comey, claims that he just wants to make sure that there is no wrongdoing here or as one lawyer put it, he’s covering his ass. The DOJ promptly fired back with a complaint against Comey. We find it interesting, that Comey, who claims he isn’t a Republican anymore, has long had ties to them and he even did his thesis in college on everyone’s favorite evangelical theocrat James Falwell. What’s interesting is that back in June, Comey claimed the matter closed and that no reasonable prosecutor would pursue the matter. But here it is, almost election time (and Halloween)…and surprise, surpise – more emails! Maybe Comey had this planned all along like the Democrats are now claiming. Or maybe he is just covering his ass and making absolutely positive that there was no wrongdoing like he did before.  All we know is that this goddamn farce that is Con-a-thon 2016 can’t get over soon enough. Thanks for the added stress Mr. James Comey! Can we send our medical bills for anxiety and mental fatigue to you?

FBI director James Comey says that Hillary Clinton is too far ahead and decided to give Trump's easily pissed off supporters more red meat on which they can gnaw.

FBI director James Comey decided that there wasn’t enough tension in the 2016 Presidential election, so he decided to throw some red meat to Donald Trump’s rabid, easily pissed off supporters to make things interesting.