Tag Archive for corrupt

Cannon Misfires

We’re taking another brief interlude from our coverage of whack job Arizona GOP candidates to post about the absolutely unscrupulous and feckless U.S. District Court Judge Aileen Cannon, who was confirmed in the waning days of the Trump administration and nominated by the twice impeached megalomaniac man child himself and is also a member of the right wing conservative Federalist Society.

It appears that Cannon is staying loyal to her master by agreeing that a special master be chosen to review the classified documents retrieved by the FBI at TFG’s palatial estate Mar-a-lago in August which is precisely what Trump wanted. Then she appointed Raymond Dearie as the special master who is also one of the judges Trump wanted. Hmmmmm. See a pattern here? Can you say corrupt? Both Democrats and Republicans say that Dearle is honorable and above reproach so we’ll wait and see what happens in the coming weeks. But given that Trump always seems to get his way, we’re incredibly skeptical that justice will prevail.

Anyway judicial pundits have jumped all over Cannon and her fealty to her special master Trump essentially granting him the delay he wanted. These are ultra classified documents that Trump should not have. Those documents belong to the people of the United States not Donald Trump. Doesn’t the national security of 332 million Americans come before Trump’s reputation or feelings? Apparently not, as Cannon, in her briefing, basically stated that the reputation of TFG is paramount and that she doesn’t believe the FBI and the DOJ when they say the documents were classified. The FBI took pictures of the documents! They were classified! This is not a witch hunt! Trump took classified documents and his appointed lackey judge is trying to cover it up. Judge Cannon is utterly corrupt! She should be removed from office and barred from practicing law in the United States! Maybe she could move to Russia? Putin could use a good sycophant to support his crimes these days.

Corrupt Trump appointee Judge Aileen Cannon has decided that twice impeached former President Donald Trump's feelings are more important than the national security of 332 million Americans.
Corrupt Trump appointee Judge Aileen Cannon has decided that twice impeached former President Donald Trump’s feelings are more important than the national security of 332 million Americans.

Trump In The Toidy

Words can’t express the glee we’ve had this week with the news of the FBI issuing a search warrant at TFG’s palatial residence Mar-a-lago in Florida. With unsealing of the warrant today, we’ve learned that the twice impeached orange haired megalomaniac man child is under investigation for possible violating of the Espionage Act. We’ve been critical of Merrick Garland and the DOJ for seemingly doing nothing to bring the former CEO/Dictator to justice but we stand corrected. Garland has handled everything masterfully this week and we’ve got a huge case of schadenfreude, just like at least 81 million other Americans.

In celebration of TFG finally appearing to face some justice, we’ve decided to repost a photo-toon from December 8, 2019. It depicts what a possible Trump Memorial might look like showing TFG sitting on his favorite throne dictating to his followers on Twitter, explaining COVFEFE and stating that we should all get over the fact that he’s a crook. At least we know now why he was obsessed with toilets flushing – that’s where he tried to put his torn up documents. Let this be the crime that puts him in a jail cell with a guy named Bubba who’s fond of spoonin’.

Plans are being made for the Trump Memorial which will feature America's CEO/Dictator Donald Trump sitting on his throne tweeting words of wisdom (like Covfefe) on his phone with his massive hands. The monument will be located in Washington D.C. in an alley behind a KFC next to a dumpster that frequently catches fire.
Plans are being made for the Trump Memorial which will feature America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump sitting on his throne tweeting words of wisdom (like Covfefe) on his phone with his massive hands. The monument will be located in Washington D.C. in an alley behind a KFC next to a dumpster that frequently catches fire.

Coal Munchin’ Manchin

There’s tons of important events occurring right now in the world: the continuing war in Ukraine, the Jan. 6th hearings, the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic and the record heat waves covering most of the northern hemisphere that are clearly related to climate change. Segue to DINO West Virginia Senator Joe Manchin who has singlehandedly held up Democrat legislation and the Build Back Better program numerous times now during Joe Biden’s presidency. His latest monkey wrench is his opposition to a bill that would help create regulations that might alleviate the drastic effects of climate change that we’re currently seeing. At least federal environmental agency staffers and members of Congress have had enough and urged Biden and Senate Majority Leader Chuck Shumer to strip Manchin of his chairmanship of the Senate Energy and Natural Resources Committee.

The problem is Joe Manchin, like every Republican lawmaker, is bought and paid for by the fossil fuel industry. He serves as nothing more than a self-serving lackey for coal, gas and oil interests. It’s true that West Virginia is a coal mining state, but burning coal is one of the primary reasons for climate change and must be eliminated. Not only that, mountaintop strip mining leaves the environment in a devastated condition. Manchin and Arizona’s own sassy grrrl Senator Kyrsten Sinema, continue to be enamored with the filibuster (or Phil E. Buster as we joked), and their persistence in upholding this ugly, unsightly tradition may not only lead to the fall of democracy but in the complete destruction of this planet which, by the way, is the only place we know of that supports life. There is no planet B, folks! We all need to conserve energy and curb our consumption and consumerism. There is no other option!

Executives in the coal, gas and oil industries are relieved that they've got such a solid lackey like Joe Manchin in Congress who puts profits before the health of the planet and its inhabitants.
Executives in the coal, gas and oil industries are relieved that they’ve got such a solid lackey like Joe Manchin in Congress who puts profits before the health of the planet and its inhabitants.

Bush’s Forever War

Like we mentioned in our previous post, one of the disturbing events which happened this summer was the media’s treatment of the United States’ withdrawal from the Afghanistan quagmire after twenty long frustrating years. The Taliban quickly regained controlled of the country from the sham government propped up by the U.S. and the corporate main stream media was quick to blame everything on Joe Biden despite twenty years of missteps from not only the Bush and TFG administrations but also the Obama White House.

Most Americans seem to be correctly blaming the Bush administration for the failures. But they also blame Biden which is completely wrong. Granted, the withdrawal did not go smoothly. But was that Biden’s fault? We think not. For one thing, the media seemed to gloss over the fact that TFG not only released thousands 5,000 Taliban prisoners while he was in office, he also scheduled the withdrawal immediately in 2021. Biden had only six months to make sure the very weak government of Afghanistan was in order before withdrawal thanks to TFG’s schedule. Don’t forget, TFG wasn’t too smooth with the withdrawal from Syria leaving the Kurds high and dry against not only their adversaries in Syria but also Turkey.

There have been a multitude of failures over the past twenty years in Afghanistan. After killing Osama Bin Laden, Obama had the opportunity to exit the country where empires go to die but failed to do so. The number of snafus committed by the Bush administration are legion. We never should have gotten involved in the first place. We didn’t learn our lessons from Vietnam and thanks to ol’ clueless Dubya, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld and the war mongering, conservative Republicans, we ended up repeating the very same mistakes, all to make money for the military industrial complex. Considering that TFG always bitched about Bush, why didn’t he withdraw from Afghanistan during his administration? Because the Republican’s modus operandi is to boldly go nation building in impossible countries half way around the globe knowing full well that it will be impossible to leave and when Democrats get elected to clean things up, they will receive the blame, just like Biden did.

Like we said in the previous post, the corporate main stream media will throw anybody under the bus if it means money and ratings and right now they are pushing right wing talking points which are false and misleading. Biden made some mistakes, but the blame for the Afghanistan quagmire, just like the Iraq clusterf*ck falls firmly on the George W. Bush administration. Thanks Dubya! At least you’re painting pictures now instead of making more forever wars.

Much to the delight of former President George W. Bush, his buddies in the corporate main stream media have blamed current President Joe Biden for Dubya's failures in the Afghanistan quagmire.
Much to the delight of former President George W. Bush, his buddies in the corporate main stream media have blamed current President Joe Biden for Dubya’s failures in the Afghanistan quagmire.

So Much Vice, GOP Acquits Twice

The second impeachment trial of America’s former CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump has concluded and to no one’s surprise, he was acquitted, despite a 57-43 vote of guilty. Seven GOP Senators voted for rule of law over party joining all fifty Democrats in saying that Trump incited the riots on January 6th because . . . of course he did. We all saw it on tape!

What’s especially galling is the statement from minority leader Moscow Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell made after the vote, which takes the cake for unethical hypocrisy. He basically said that Trump was guilty of provoking the insurrection and should be held accountable. And how do we do that? You impeach the bastard! But no, no, no… Turtle Boy voted to acquit. So, in a nutshell, Trump and the Republicans got away with their malfeasance like they’ve done for the last four years. There was one time Trump told the truth in his whole time as leader of the GOP and that was when he stated he could shoot somebody on 5th Ave and still not lose any supporters. He just incited an insurrection on the Capitol of the United States of America and five people died and several more were injured . . . and he got away with it without losing supporters. And the supposed party of moral responsibility allowed him to do so. If there was any doubt that the GOP is an unethical, immoral, corrupt, crime syndicate of greedy hooligans and grifters before the trial, then all skepticism should be obliterated by this decision. They openly support authoritarian fascist actions to overthrow democracy and install permanent Republican rule.

Speaking of immoral grifters, one of our least favorite humans on the planet passed away, Boss Limhogg himself, Rush Limbaugh. We posted a photo-toon last year that pretty much sums up our feelings about that obnoxious, racist, sexist tub of goo. In short: Rot in hell, El Rushblo!

Oozing with incandescent charisma, Moscow Mitch 'Turtle Boy' McConnell bravely acquits former CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump of responsibility for inciting the Capitol riots despite proclaiming that he was guilty as hell.
Oozing with incandescent charisma, Moscow Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell bravely acquits former CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump of responsibility for inciting the Capitol riots despite proclaiming that he was guilty as hell.

Trumper Tantrum

We’ve been really, really, really enjoying our time off from commentary on current events, but it’s probably time to get back in the swing of things. So . . . anything interesting happen since election day?

Oh, yeah. Trump’s attempted coup. Yikes!!! We just might take a permanent leave of absence. Just when you thought sanity has made a comeback, Trump and his band of detestable enablers in the House and Senate have created yet another constitutional crisis. Despite having absolutely zero evidence of voter fraud and despite numerous lawsuits being thrown out, the GOP crybabies continue to whine that the election was stolen and that the Republicans will never accept Joe Biden as President. How old are these people? Because they’re supposed to be adults but yet, like their leader, the orange-haired man child, they throw tantrums every time they don’t get their way.

But this is nothing new for Republicans. Just take a gander at our category GOP Crybabies. They’ve been whining and crying since . . . forever. If they don’t get their way, there will be hell to pay as evidence by the storming of the Capitol building today by unhinged Trump supporters, a.k.a. right-wing terrorists. We sure noticed the difference in treatment of protesters. When BLM or liberal protest groups protested over the past four years, you’d would have thought that war had broken out the way armed forces were formidably stationed themselves against protesters. Not so today. The Trump-loving troglodytes were practically escorted by ‘law enforcement’ into the building to wreak havoc. What a load of bullshit!!!

So, in short: FUCK YOU, YOU GODDAMN REPUBLICAN CRYBABIES!!!

Whiny, sucky GOP crybabies throw their hissy fits and temper tantrums, all in an effort to overthrow the results of a democratic election to make their crooked dear Leader, America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, President-for-life,
Whiny, sucky GOP crybabies throw their hissy fits and temper tantrums, all in an effort to overthrow the results of a democratic election to make their crooked dear Leader, America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, President-for-life,

So Much Whining

It’s been two weeks since the 2020 presidential election and ten days since Joe Biden was declared the president-elect and still America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump is throwing a hissy fit like a three year old toddler, proclaiming all the while that he didn’t lose the election and that he will never concede. He has launched several unsuccessful attacks trying to overturn the results in states like Michigan , Georgia and Pennsylvania but to no avail. Trump lost the election, by a ‘landslide’ (in 2016 Trumpianese) and he refuses to deal with it and many Republicans, like Lindsey Graham, are supporting his efforts. What’s more, the Trump administration’s refusal to interact with the Biden transition team is further endangering our democratic institutions and emboldening his insane right wing followers like QAnon, the Proud Boys, and evangelical zealots who act more like demons than their hero, Jesus.

Maybe Trump should take a page out of his 2016 election victory and call on his pal Vlad Putin to interfere, which was confirmed by the Mueller report. But it’s probably too late for those kind of shenanigans. We just heard that Putin only likes Presidents who don’t lose. Tough luck, little Donny! We guess it’s back to your incessant whining and diaper pooping.

America's Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump receives a wake-up call from his former BFF Vlad Putin.
America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump receives a wake-up call from his former BFF Vlad Putin.

Louis DeASS

With the revelations by the Republican led Senate Intelligence Committee this last week, it’s been made crystal clear that the Trump campaign colluded with Russia in tampering with the 2016 election. It’s out in the open that America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump cheated his way into the White House. And now four years later, Trump is pulling out all the strings again to cheat his way back for another four years.

This time, Trump’s sabotaging one of the United States’ most venerable institutions, the Post Office. Our megalomaniac-in-chief nominated a full-fledged, flying monkey lackey in big time Republican donor Louis DeJoy to be his new Postmaster General or in Republicanspeak, the hatchet man to destroy the Post Office from the inside. DeJoy has conflicts of interest here; basically he’s invested in competitors to the USPS. So Trump putting DeJoy in charge of the Post Office is like putting an arsonist in charge of the Fire Department. In testimony in front of the House Oversight Committee, DeJoy’s even proclaimed how little he knows about the Post Office. But that hasn’t stopped this obsequious Trump lackey. DeJoy has removed sorting machines and mailboxes in an effort to disrupt mail-in balloting. The Democrats have passed a bill for emergency funding for the USPS and because of the pressure, DeJoy has stated that he won’t continue any more reductions. But he also proclaimed that he won’t restore the removed equipment. Fortunately, some post office workers are getting into ‘good trouble’, as the late John Lewis would call it. Workers in Washington state have defied orders and put sorting machines back into service. We also know that we can’t trust Trump’s new Postmaster General because the Democrats in the House Oversight Committee have uncovered how much the mail has slowed down because of DeJoy’s ineptitude.

Considering the actions taken this summer, a more appropriate moniker for Louis DeJoy would be Louis DeASS. He’s just like every other crook in the Trump crime syndicate; the list of Trump’s criminal associates just keep growing – Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, Roger Stone, Michael Cohen, Steve Bannon, etc… Just one look at that cheezy-ass smile on DeJoy’s face and you realize that this corrupt man is one of those ‘biznuss’ assholes who tells you he’s going to screw you over and that you’ll like it, too. DeJoy and Trump are clearly obstructing the mail, which is clearly against the law. They should be dealt with like the criminals they are.

Considering his actions this summer, a more appropriate moniker for Trump's new Postmaster General would by Louis DeASS.
Considering his actions this summer, a more appropriate moniker for Trump’s new Postmaster General would by Louis DeASS.

Trump: Full O’ Beans

The clusterf*ck presidency of Donald Trump drones onward and with every passing day, absurd events occur leaving normal sane individuals banging their heads against brick walls in disbelief. Take Trump’s recent escapade with Goya Beans, a company which sells products catering to the Latino and Hispanic marketplace. Goya CEO Robert Unanue met with Trump and praised him effusively. One cannot find a more vomit inducing example of obsequiousness, even among GOP sycophants. Just watch the video in the link above. It reminds us of that poll last year when Republicans claimed that Trump’s a better President than Lincoln. Puke, puke and puke!!! Ignorance is alive and well in America, folks!

Not surprisingly, Hispanics, who don’t particularly care for Trump (he called them rapists and murderers), were outraged by the Goya CEO and started a campaign to boycott Goya. Not to be outdone, the Trump family charged into action . . . okay. . . they slithered into action. Ivanka did her best model impersonation with a can of Goya beans and Trump laid out a whole line of Goya products to give his seal of approval., The only problem is that while Trump’s endorsement of Goya may not be illegal, it is definitely unethical. In Ivanka’s case, it’s unethical and she probably broke the law. But why should that matter to the Trump Family Crime Syndicate. Ethics, smethics! The laws don’t apply to them. They’ve been doing whatever they want since Fred Sr. ruled the roost, taking no responsibility and facing no repercussions for their actions.

Who knows? Maybe Trump is planning to roll out a new business in the fine tradition of his other ‘successful’ endeavors like Trump Vodka, Trump Water, Trump Air and Trump University. Yep, we think Trump Beans is on the horizon, because when it comes to beans. . . Trump is full of ’em. Ivanka can even lend her incredible smiling and holding talents to pose with a can of Trump beans cajoling people to “Jump start your farts with my Daddy’s favorite.” Trump can even create an award called the “Ten Toot Salute” to proudly promote that his beans are winners. And pay no attention to the explosive flatulence or chronic diarrhea. That’s all a hoax! Eat the beans! What have you got to lose!

From the fine people who brought you Trump Vodka, Trump Air, Trump Water and Trump University comes their next doomed endeavor, the ultimate in designer beans, Trump Beans. Because when it comes to beans, Trump is full of 'em. Trump Beans is the winner of the coveted Ten Toot Salute award created by Donald Trump for excellence in bean stuff. Like Ivanka sez, jump start your farts with her Daddy's favorite, Trump Beans. Rumors that these beans cause explosive flatulence and chronic diarrhea are a hoax. Go ahead and eat 'em. What have you got to lose.
From the fine people who brought you Trump Vodka, Trump Air, Trump Water and Trump University comes their next doomed endeavor, the ultimate in designer beans, Trump Beans. Because when it comes to beans, Trump is full of ’em. Trump Beans is the winner of the coveted Ten Toot Salute award created by Donald Trump for excellence in bean stuff. Like Ivanka sez, jump start your farts with her Daddy’s favorite, Trump Beans. Rumors that these beans cause explosive flatulence and chronic diarrhea are a hoax. Go ahead and eat ’em. What have you got to lose.

The Derp Doctors

Last week, Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, trotted out two famous television doctors, Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz, to spew forth reasons why America should open up the economy despite nationally, being nowhere close to flattening the curve of the coronavirus pandemic. Both doctors, surprisingly enough, got their big break from the queen of all media Oprah Winfrey. Staff member Chester Einstein has always been a huge fan of Ms. Winfrey, but when it comes to Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz, he’s reduced to twiddling his lips. Quoting Chester, “These guys are clowns!” And from what these TV physicians said last week, we’re inclined to agree. As a matter of fact, we think they’re Oprah’s two biggest mistakes.

First, Dr. Phil. We’ve always thought his folksy prescriptions for living a better life were a bit reminiscent of a snake oil salesman. We even created a BilgeBucket list of Dr. Phils folksiest pieces of advice bullshit for improving your life. We’re particularly fond of ” If you can con Oprah into thinking you know something, start pricing solid gold houses .” Remember, she was hoodwinked by author James Frey. Anyway, Dr. Phil started making ill-advised and completely inappropriate comparisons of COVID-19 deaths to swimming pool, auto accident and smoking deaths. He stated basically that people die all the time, why not just open up the country.

Dr. Oz made a similar tone deaf argument stating that we need to open up schools as soon as possible, saying that a 2-3% death rate for children might be considered acceptable. Really!!!??? This quack has already been backpedaling on his comments about hydroxychloroquine. Now this blubbering bonehead, along with Dr. Phil are moonwalking more than Michael Jackson. One thing’s for sure: Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz are now America’s Derp Doctors. Trust them at your own risk, America.

Oprah discoveries Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil have officially become America's Derp Doctors with their tone deaf prescriptions for opening up the economy despite the coronavirus curve not even being close to flattening.
Oprah discoveries Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil have officially become America’s Derp Doctors with their tone deaf prescriptions for opening up the economy despite the coronavirus curve not even being close to flattening.