Archive for January 25, 2014

The End Of The World As We Know It

An earth shaking event occurred this past week that affected everyone all over the world and very well could signal the apocalypse. Every news outlet covered it as one of it’s top stories and people and pundits alike are debating the significance and consequences of it. Did another nuclear reactor start leaking radiation? Was there another oil or chemical spill? Did North Korea launch a nuclear missile? Did war break out in the Middle East? No folks, I’m afraid it’s much worse than that.

Which celebrity do we worship now that Justin Bieber has been arrested. Is it the end of the world.

The arrest of teen pop artist, Justin Bieber, on suspicion of a DUI just may bring on the apocalypse.


Spill? What Spill?

The water in Charleston, West Virginia has finally been declared safe for drinking after a chemical spill into the Elk River from Freedom Industries on January 9th. This happened when an aging containment tank leaked MCHM, which is an agent used in processing coal, into the Elk River above the water intake for the company which provides water service for the area. It appears that this facility hadn’t been inspected by federal or state officials since 1991. It was also just determined that another chemical called PPH was also leaked into the water. Of course, since the government is controlled by the oil, gas and coal industries, it’s not surprising that Washington is using the  “there’s nothing to see here” approach to damage control (remember the BP Gulf of Mexico oil spill a few years back). John Boehner said no new regulations are needed and all the other corporate lackeys in Washington are keeping mum as well. But this shouldn’t be surprising since our elected officials, especially Republicans, have been trying to reduce regulations and oversight since the Reagan administration. Dubya even put industry officials in key positions in the EPA. That’s like putting the mouse in charge of the cheese. Next industry officials will be trying to spin that MCHM and PPH are good for you. It’s smells like licorice, how bad can it be, right?

The water in Charleston, West Virginia tastes a lot like Freedom these days thanks to the coal industry.

A coal industry representative performs damage control with the citizens of Charleston, West Virginia after a chemical spill from an aging Freedom Industries tank leaked into the local water supply.

Mr. Science

When you think of top modern day scientists, who do you think of…Stephen Hawking, Jane Goodall, Richard Dawkins? Well, apparently El Rushblo, aka Boss Limhogg, aka Rush Limbaugh knows more about science than anyone on the planet. He’s already known for his statements knocking stem cell research, birth control and climate change. Well he was after climate scientists again last week during the invasion of the polar vortex, saying that the polar vortex was nothing but a liberal invention to “lie” to the public about the “hoax” of climate change. And Rush should know since he never graduated college. But he does sit around in his radio studio bloviating hot air all day long and he does make $70 million a year so I guess that makes him an expert. Remember, in America, if you have money, you’re an expert at everything. We thought it was funny that Al Roker called El Rushblo on his BS. Here’s a thorough explanation from White House Science and Technology Advisor, Dr. John Holdren, too. Maybe Limbaugh should actually take a refresher course in science before he opens up his mouth again. Naaaaaaah! There’s money to be made in stoking the fires of ignorance.

Rush Limbaugh, recently stated that according to his thorough research, all scientists are idiots except the ones who created Viagra and Oxycontin.

Conservative talk show host, 'El Rushblo' Rush Limbaugh, is working around the clock at Republican Science Labs to debunk the 'theories' of evolution, gravity and a round earth.

A Bridge Too Jammed

New Jersey Governor and 2016 GOP presidential candidate, Chris Christie, is embroiled currently in a huge political scandal where his staffers ordered a massive traffic jam on the George Washington bridge entering Fort Lee, New Jersey as a payback for the Fort Lee mayor endorsing the Democratic candidate for Governor last year. This kind of puts a damper on his presidential aspirations but then again it is only 2014. We’ve got two years left to go before the presidential election. Given how forgetful Americans are, by 2016 they’ll probably say, “What bridge scandal?”

ChrisChristie says if you want to cross the George Washington bridge, a vote for Christie is in order

New Jersey GOP governor and dapper dresser, Chris Christie, lays down the law for people who may want to cross the George Washington bridge.