Tag Archive for gun control

The New Texas Elementary School/Prison

The radical right wing conservative christian Republicans are in full crazy mode and they are showing it all over the place. The heavily christian Supreme Court ruled to take away abortion rights for women last week. This week they said prayer in a public school is a-okay and the football coach at a public high school who led his team in a prayer on the field was wrongfully fired. We wonder if this christian nationalist zealots would feel the same way if the coach was Muslim or Hindu or Jewish.

But the state of Texas is leading the way in crazy. Recently, not only did they support the Big Lie that Joe Biden didn’t win the election but they also passed resolution in their state legislature that paves the way for Texas to secede from the United States. We mentioned before how we would love to see that happen; a Texit if you will. We’d help them pack. Amongst the other crazy things they mentioned in the official Republican platform were: labeling homosexuality as an abnormal lifestyle; make it easier to get a gun; restrict voting rights; ignore and accelerate climate change; ban all abortions from the moment of fertilization (super crazy); preserve confederate monuments and repealing hate crime laws because … you know … the Republican hate everything and everybody, which isn’t very christian.

Texas’ senators John Cornyn and Ted Cruz are also showing their true nature as assholes. Cornyn recently sent a completely uncompassionate tweet about overturning Brown v. Board of Education which paved the way for desegregation. And of course, Ted Cruz, the Senator everybody hates, said after the Uvalde school shooting that what we really need is to have just one entrance and exit to a school. It’s not the guns – it’s the doors! Wow! What an idiot!!! Not only would that be a fire hazard, but it turns our educational system into a prison system. But we’re guessing the heartless GOP would be fine with that. Just send the little urchins to school but be sure to protect the things of real value; their precious guns. Oh and fetuses, too. Once the fetus is born, screw it. All we have to say to Texas is: Please secede! And take Oklahoma, Arkansas and the other ass backward southern states with you. We promise we won’t fight a war to keep you with us, this time. Goodbye and good riddance, you stupid sanctimonious, holier-than-thou assholes!

The future inmates of Texas' educational system will be groomed with all kinds of fun alternative facts while also preserving the precious guns of Texans.
The future inmates of Texas’ educational system will be groomed with all kinds of fun alternative facts while also preserving the precious guns of Texans.

Go Nuts, Women!

The Jan. 6th hearings have begun and the committee members seem to be doing a good job of laying the groundwork that the Capitol riots were indeed an attempted coup (like we all know it was) and not a friendly, little tourist visit like TFG and his gaslighting Republicans sheeple claim it was. Will it lead to the lying, orange-haired megalomaniac and some of his henchman actually paying for their crimes and going to prison? Unfortunately, we’re pretty skeptical on that.

But as if on cue, the Supreme Court decided to take the attention off of Trump’s culpability by finally overturning Roe v. Wade and setting women’s rights back a half century. We’ve commented many times about a woman’s right to have autonomy over her own body. This seems straightforward to us here at the Bucket and we’re guys. Maybe if the situation is presented in a different way, then maybe the authoritarian christian conservatives who want to rule over every aspect of our lives with an iron fist will understand. Here goes! The uterus is a part of a woman’s body. The testes are parts of a man’s body. It stands to reason that if a man can control a woman’s uterus, then a woman should be able to control a man’s testes. Since the ultra conservative Supreme Court has also expanded concealed gun rights and firearms are pretty much free for the taking here in America, maybe women should start blasting some nuts of these sanctimonious assholes to make a point. Then maybe they’d understand that a person should be able to control their own bodies. We say GO NUTS, WOMEN!!!

In light of the Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade and expanding gun rights, it stands to reason that if a man can control a woman's uterus, then a woman can control a man's testes. Go nuts, women!
In light of the Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade and expanding gun rights, it stands to reason that if a man can control a woman’s uterus, then a woman can control a man’s testes. Go nuts, women!

Thoughts And Prayers Aren’t Working

Another day, another mass shooting. Ahhhh, America! Memorial Day weekend was celebrated with eleven mass shootings. We’ve commented about the ineptitude of our lawmakers in relation to common sense gun laws numerous times before here over the years. And the cowardly corporate lackeys who call themselves Senators and Representatives are once again trotting out the empty platitudes of ‘thoughts and prayers’ after the deadly Uvalde school shooting last week and the horrendous massacre at supermarket in Buffalo on May 14th. Will these shootings be the ones that will get some gun control legislation passed? Sorry to be pessimistic, but no. This nation has a colossal problem and that is the love of guns is institutionalized in every aspect of our life; media, movies, culture and economy. Our politicians are nothing more than corporate lackeys for weapons industry and the NRA. The term ‘gun fetish’ is very appropriate. We’ve got people in this country who love guns more than life itself. And many of these people are the same ones who state that they are pro-life. The truth is that there are many people in this country who’ve never owned or shot a firearm and are living very happy, healthy, productive lives.

We’re repeating our photo-toon from our February 14, 2020 post. Once more, we say that if you love your guns more than life itself than do not call yourself pro-life. Guns exist to kill, not give life. So, go home and f*ck your guns, you hypocritic assholes.

Here's a handy dandy gun control solution for all those gun enthusiasts out there who love their guns more than life itself. Guaranteed to be a mind-blowing experience!
Here’s a handy dandy gun control solution for all those gun enthusiasts out there who love their guns more than life itself. Guaranteed to be a mind-blowing experience!

Foolproof Gun Control Solution

The coronavirus has gained the attention of the world recently with more than 65,000 cases reported globally and almost 1,5000 deaths. America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator Donald Trump even took an aggressive stand by issuing travel restrictions with China where the virus originated. But many feel that the travel ban could backfire. While we applaud this act of preparedness, health officials and the CDC say that the flu is much more dangerous and has already claimed 10,000 lives in the U.S. since October.

But there is one deathly scourge that continues to be ignored by the corporate media and the corrupt, conservative Republican corporate lackeys in Congress who continue to look the other way and do nothing. That menace is none other than gun violence. In America, gun violence kills far more people than coronavirus every year (36,000 gun deaths each year with more than 100,000 shot and injured) but yet the corporate media chooses to gaslight us and continue to scare the sheeple with the occasional and over-hyped biological threats. Over-hyped is a strong word but look at the numbers. According to the CDC, 445 people are under investigation in the U.S. for coronavirus. There are about 325 million people in America, so that means that 0.00013692307 percent of Americans have the virus. In China, which has almost 1.4 billion people, there are 60,000 confirmed cases. So, that means that 0.00428571428 percent of the Chinese population have the virus. There are already questions concerning the numbers being reported from Chinese officials.

This is par for the course for the Republicans and their cohorts in the corporate media. Would Trump ever consider signing an executive order banning assault weapons? Are you kidding???!!! The Republicans love using viruses as way to scare the sheeple. Look at the 2014 election, when the GOP announced to everybody that Ebola was coming to get them. Ebola can only be transmitted if you’re in direct contact with bodily fluids of an infected person, but that didn’t bother the Republicans from lying their asses off to get their permanently scared constituents to vote for them to ‘save the day’. We’ve seen how much more corrupt they’ve become since then with their whitewashing of Trump during his impeachment trial and the complete collapse of the now corrupted Department of Justice.

Since Republicans refuse to do anything about our biggest crisis, we here at the Bucket have a foolproof method of gun control. Sure it’s a bit crude but you know what, so are today’s right wing conservative gun nuts. So, just in time for Valentine’s Day, if you love guns more than life itself:

  • go home
  • give your favorite firearm a blow job
  • bring that gun to orgasm

Or in simpler terms: Go F*ck Your Gun! We guarantee it will be a mind-blowing experience and we might finally be able to pass some decent legislation making America safe and sane again before the next round of mass shootings.

Here's a handy dandy gun control solution for all those gun enthusiasts out there who love their guns more than life itself. Guaranteed to be a mind-blowing experience!
Here’s a handy dandy gun control solution for all those gun enthusiasts out there who love their guns more than life itself. Guaranteed to be a mind-blowing experience!

GOP Wants Pistol Packing Teachers

We’ve commented many times about gun control here. We’ve even created a category. This subject seems like a no-brainer to most civilized, intelligent citizens. For starters, reinstate the assault weapon ban and mass school shootings will decline. All logic points to this action.

But American CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, and his Republican pals continue to lick the ass of their masters, the NRA, and push for ludicrous, asinine solutions. Just this past week Trump trotted out the old “let’s arm the teachers” suggestion to widespread and deserved ridicule. Then he backtracked and suggested that the cruel media was putting words in his mouth. Then he suggested that he’d run in and save the children. This from a man who got five deferments from Vietnam, one for bone spurs. He couldn’t even protect his son and wife from rain with his umbrella. And yet, Trump would charge into a school without a weapon to attack a shooter?  Not bloody likely!

Let’s make no mistake: arming teachers is a horrendous idea. Arming students is a horrendous idea. Voting for Republicans is a horrendous idea. Modern day conservative Republicans are broken human beings and need to be removed from any kind of position of power.  And Democrats, who also feed at the NRA trough, need to start stepping up to the plate, grow a spine and start pushing for legislation against assault weapons.

And as if on cue, this just in… there’s news that a teacher in Georgia barricaded himself inside a school and fired a gun. Hey Republicans…still think arming teachers is a great idea?

In conservative Republican schools of the future, no nonsense teachers will teach our children the importance of a good education beginning with how to use a gun.

In conservative Republican schools of the future, no nonsense teachers will teach our children the importance of a good education beginning with how to use a gun.

In Guns We Trust

Another day, another mass shooting. With the Orlando shooting last weekend, we’ve had 182 mass shootings alone in the U.S. this year. Ahhh…life in 21st century America. We’ve commented ad infinitum about the need for gun control in this country, especially for assault weapons (just do a search for gun on this website). But our feckless, craven, Republican congressmen and senators are too beholden to the NRA and the gun lobby to do anything about it. Apparently, this is what our ‘compassionate’ conservative, GOP leaders want for this nation; people loving guns more than they do other people. This is the new norm. We might as well mint a new $1 dollar coin announcing our new national motto, “In Guns We Trust”.

Republican senators and congressmen, in conjunction with the NRA, have authorized the minting of a new $1 coin with the new national motto, 'In Guns We Trust' emblazoned on the obverse side, to show the world that in America, guns are more important than people.

Republican senators and congressmen, in conjunction with the NRA, have authorized the minting of a new $1 coin with the new national motto, ‘In Guns We Trust’ emblazoned on the obverse side, to show the world that in America, guns are more important than people.

Only The Powah of Prayer Can Help

Another day, another shooting…aaaah, life in 21st century America. This time, instead of radical christian terrorists, it was radical islamic terrorists…but still radical religious terrorists. This husband and wife team killed 14 people and injured 21 with assault weapons, which according to every gun enthusiast, is vital to living a happy life in this country. Again the response by Republicans has been pathetic. GOP presidential candidate, Marco Rubio, proclaimed that gun control legislation won’t help and many Republicans, including the smuggest Senator alive and GOP candidate, Ted Cruz, said they’re sending their prayers to the victims. In fact, President Obama caused quite a ruckus when he rightfully said “God isn’t fixing this” and correctly pushed for gun control legislation. The Republican Propaganda Network, a.k.a. Fox News, jumped in and offered the insipid response that if you’re not praying you’re for the terrorists.(That’s sounds a lot like Dubya’s old catchphrase). And of course, the NRA High Priest, Wayne LaPierre, made a video designed to make everyone want to go out, buy a gun and join in the melee, in the name of national security. At least The New York Daily News came out with a full page headline blasting Republicans on their inaction. Maybe this will light a match under the Republicans to grow a pair and stand up to the special interest groups like the NRA and the gun industry, who control them like they’re puppets. Will it work? Let’s just put it this way; we wonder where the next shooting is going to be.

GOP candidates and super clowns, Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz, proclaim that owning an assault weapon is every American's sacred right and that only the power of prayer can save us from more shootings, which gets an amen and hallelujah from NRA high priest Wayne LaPierre.

GOP candidates and super clowns, Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz, proclaim that owning an assault weapon is every American’s sacred right and that only the power of prayer can save us from more shootings, much to the evangelical delight of NRA high priest Wayne LaPierre.

The Republicans’ Toxic Masculinity Problem

The Republicans’ stupid has been coming fast and furious lately…it’s been hard for us to keep up. But we’ve got to comment on Jeb Bush’s statements following the school shootings in Oregon last week. In an interview following the tragedy, ‘compassionate conservative’ Jeb stated that you know ‘Stuff happens’. Can’t you just feel the sympathy oozing from his pores? Just the latest in our corporate lackey politicians licking the gun barrels of the NRA, the weapons industry and the military industrial complex. Because you know you can’t possibly be a man unless you have a gun and of course, as in all things manly, you’ve got to have either a big gun or a lot of them.

There’s a new buzzword that’s been making the rounds lately called ‘toxic masculinity’ and this catch phrase fits today’s gun culture perfectly.  Since December 2012, we’ve had 990 mass shootings. When you care more about a gun than living beings, that’s a sign of a sick society. Our spineless politicians should stand up to the gun lobbyists and say enough is enough. It’s incredible that Republicans are so myopic that they’re still focusing on the 4 lives lost at Benghazi and not the 1249 people lost to gun violence in the past three years. It’s time for Americans to vote these incompetents out of office. If our elected officials won’t take the necessary steps to make this country safer, then maybe it’s time for new elected officials.

GOP Presidential candidate Jeb Bush, compassionately explains that 'stuff happens' while NRA executive vice president, Wayne LaPierre, gives him a big vote of approval.

GOP Presidential candidate Jeb Bush, compassionately explains that ‘stuff happens’ while NRA executive vice president, Wayne LaPierre, gives him a big vote of approval.

Paranoid States of America

The verdict from the George Zimmerman trial is in and unbelievably he was found not guilty. Right wingers and gun nuts have declared victory for justice in America. Really? Well, it is a golden age for gun makers since everybody and their brother will be buying up arms, especially in Florida, so they don’t feel threatened. So just remember folks: if you’re walking down the street all locked and loaded and itching to shoot and you see some young hooligan wearing a hoodie, go ahead and pop him one, because you know anyone wearing a hoodie is sure to be threatening you.

In the wake of the Zimmerman trial, neighbors are reaching out to each other all across America.

Congress Keeps Priorities

In keeping with the Congress sucking theme…

Recently, a bill that would have strengthened background checks for gun purchases failed to pass despite passing 55-45, this despite a majority voting for it and 90% of Americans wanting stronger background checks. Republican Senators who voted against the bill proudly stated their obstructionism. Mitch ‘The Turtle’ McConnell even mocked the legislation on his facebook page after the vote. Then of course there is the dishonorable Senator Jeff ‘Two-Face’ Flake (but what a great smile and wow, the hair!) from our not-so-great-lately state of Arizona. He told constituents that he supported background checks and then promptly voted against the bill. Then his teenage son recently got into hot water when he tweeted homophobic and racist tweets on Twitter.  That’s would Jesus would do, right? So much for compassionate christian conservatism.

It’s nice to know that our elected officials are keeping their priorities straight, eh?

American gun lovers rejoiced after GOP Senators like Mitch ‘The Turtle’ McConnell and Jeff ‘Two Face’ Flake struck down legislation that would have required universal background checks on all gun purchases.