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Rewind: WMDs In North Dakota?

January 27, 2023 bb_admin Articles:Political BS, Compassionate CONservatives, Corporate States of America, Dubya's Madcap Misadventures, Grand Old Plutocrats, Neocon Media Circus

2023 marks the 20th anniversary of the BilgeBucket Gazette. Our first issue was on May 19, 2003 and we’ve been shoveling it to the public, just like the corporate media, ever since. We changed our format to a WordPress blog in 2011 so all of our earlier material was archived. We’ve been reposting many of those archived articles, headlines, photo-toons, BilgeBucket Lists and other content over the past twelve years. In honor of our 20th, and because we’re sick of the current state of affairs in the world, we’ll be reposting more items from 2003 through 2009 throughout this year.

Here’s our very first article from our May 19, 2003 issue. Back then the Republicans had just invaded Iraq on the false claim that they had Weapons of Mass Destruction. This gave rise to the imperialistic Bush Doctrine which states that the United States has the right to invade a country if they are suspected of having WMDs or being a threat in any way, which opens up a host of possibilities for abuse of power and violation of civil liberties. But that doesn’t matter to the authoritarian Republicans as Bush Press Secretary Ari Fleischer proved by repeatedly doing his impersonation of a Stasi agent telling people they should watch what they say. So basically, the Republicans haven’t changed since 2003, they’re just exposed thanks to Trump and the attempted Jan. 6th insurrection to overthrow the government.

Bush Says North Dakota Has Weapons of Mass Destruction

President George Bush said today in an emergency press conference that he suspects North Dakota may have weapons of mass destruction and that he will push for complete disarmament or he will invade.

“Our intelligence has detected missile silos in North Dakota,” said Bush. “They have become a menace to the world. Their leader is worst than Hitler! I’ve seen footage of people being fed into wood chippers. If we do not stop them, a nuculyar castastr…catatat…boom-boom could happen. If they do not disarm, we will invade in twenty four hours.”

Jarrod Dayson, an alert reporter from Newsblog then reminded the president that North Dakota was in the United States and that the missile silos housed American nuclear weapons. Press Secretary Ari Fleischer, then interrupted the president, whispered into his ear and rushed him from the stage. He then commandeered the press conference explaining, “I apologize for the president’s latest statements. He awoke early from his nap and was having nightmares after watching the movie Fargo last night. North Dakota is a wonderful state and Governor Hoeven is not worse than Hitler. He was just repeating statements that he heard Bill Clinton say when he was president. Thank you.”

Fleischer then barred Dayson from any further press conferences stating in an irritated tone, “How dare he question the president of the United States! He must be for terrorism!” Forces from Homeland Security appeared and ushered Dayson on a plane to Guantanamo Bay.

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SCOTUS 2022: American Taliban

July 6, 2022 bb_admin Compassionate CONservatives, Corporate States of America, GOP Mission: Sedition, Grand Old Plutocrats, Holy Huckster Hijinx, Let Them Eat Cake, Meme-ries, Neocon Media Circus, RepubliQAnons, Teabagging **it

The actions of the five and a half christian nationalists on the Supreme Court have shocked and disturbed not just democratic minded people in this country, but all over the world. Their recent rulings on abortion, prayer in public schools and restrictions on environmental regulations are regressing American culture back to the 19th century. In the abortion decision, Samuel Alito even cited precedence from a 17th century misogynistic jurist who believed that women were witches and property. The sanctimonious justices have also indicated that they may possibly turn back other things like LGBTQ rights, interracial marriage, birth control and even having fair and democratic elections. These authoritarian zealots want to turn America into a christian theocracy.

We’ve already seen how repressive islamic theocracies are. Take the Taliban in Afghanistan. Women are treated like they were in ancient times; like second class citizens. Basic human rights are pretty much limited to straight islamic men. The clerics run the country with an iron fist. Do we really want to turn our nation into a christian version of Afghanistan? Do we really want the American Taliban on the Supreme Court to dictate every aspect of our private lives? We thought the right wing wanted government out of our lives? Recent polls have indicated that Americans have little confidence in the current Supreme Court after their latest decisions.

Let’s face it, folks – the right wing justices are clowns. The Roberts court is a complete and total joke. Brett Kavanaugh will forever be remembered for his bold proclamation of liking beer, his unhinged rant against Clinton and the Democrats and his tearful, whiney defense of his dubious actions with Christine Blasey-Ford. The handmaiden justice Amy Coney Barrett’s confirmation was jammed through despite it being an election year. Neil Gorsuch’s mother wreaked havoc on the EPA and now it’s his turn. Kavanaugh and Gorsuch committed perjury during their confirmation hearings when they stated that Roe was settled precedent. Clarence Thomas should be dismissed from the bench for his obstruction in the investigation of the Jan. 6th hearings. Why’s that? Because his wife Ginni was involved in trying to overthrow the election. And Samuel Alito should be disbarred for even thinking about quoting a 17th century jurist who believed in witches. And what’s a common thread amongst these jokers beside their holier-than-thou christianity? They’re all anti-science. They’re all skeptical of climate change, green energy, vaccines, gender science and evolution because it counters their close-minded, archaic views of the world.

The Supreme Court should not be political, but if these christian nationalists persist then the constitution much be changed so that the justices should be elected by popular vote. Therefore they should not have life time appointments – maybe just a six year term like Senators. The Democrats need to step up to the plate and check these zealot’s power while they still have some power. Maybe they need to channel their inner FDR and stack the court. The freedom loving American people will not accept an American version of the Taliban ruling over every aspect of their personal lives. We don’t want America to be a Holy Corporate Empire. This is the 21st century. Like we’ve said before many times, Americans need to connect to a 21st century database, not a 1st century database.

With their recent repressive and regressive decisions concerning abortion, guns, prayer and the environment, the justices of the Roberts court have established themselves as the American Taliban and a complete joke.
With their recent repressive and regressive decisions concerning abortion, guns, prayer and the environment, the justices of the Roberts court have established themselves as the American Taliban and a complete joke.
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Sinema: Sassy Fool & Republican Tool

January 22, 2022 bb_admin Compassionate CONservatives, Corporate States of America, Grand Old Plutocrats, Let Them Eat Cake, Neocon Media Circus, RepubliQAnons, Wide World O' Wacky

Once again, an Arizona politician is embarrassing the state on a national level and this time it’s not a Republican. In a valiant bipartisan effort to be just as bad as Arizona’s GOP, Democrat Krysten Sinema has pretty much ended the Voting Rights Bill which Joe Biden and the Democrats have been pushing that will preserve the right to vote for all Americans, not just rich white ones. But Ms. Sinema and West Virginia Senator Joe Manchin have decided that defending the filibuster is more important than protecting democracy, much to the delight of the Republicans, most of whom still think the 2020 election was stolen by Joe Biden.

So, what’s the fricking deal with Ms. Sinema? We were psyched when she got elected in 2018. She had built herself up as a liberal and her credentials were solid. She had protested the Iraq War and had solidly supported Democratic causes. She’s even a member of the LGBTQ community. Basically, she checks all the boxes you want for a Democrat. To be fair, she has voted in favor of most of the bills Biden and the rest of the Democrats have pushed through. But she also supported several pieces of legislation during the TFG’s administration that the pro-Trump Republicans favored. So, again, what’s the deal?

Ms. Sinema seems to be under the delusion that she is some sort of master of bipartisanship. Somehow, only she has the grrrl power ability to reach across the aisle and sing Kumbaya with the likes of Mitch McConnell, Lindsey Graham and Ted Cruz. And predictably, the Republicans like Turtle Boy love her, but only because she is being such a tool. Did Ms. Sinema not see the Capitol riots? The Republicans attempted a coup to overthrow a legitimate election! The 21st century GOP cannot and should not be trusted on anything! The voting rights bill needs to pass urgently – NOW – or the Republicans will absolutely put an end to democracy if they ever get power back. This is obvious! They had no problem obstructing Obama’s Supreme Court nomination in 2016, claiming it was an election year, and then hypocritically pushing their right wing nomination through in 2020, which was an election year.

But Ms. Sinema has some kind of strange attraction to the filibuster which she sees as a means of bipartisanship but in actuality is a ugly method of obstructionism. During the Civil Rights Era, Martin Luther King said this about the filibuster: “I think the tragedy is that we have a Congress with a Senate that has a minority of misguided senators who will use the filibuster to keep the majority of people from even voting.” The filibuster has an awful history, especially in the last forty years, which is right about the time that gridlock seized Congress. Yes, if you want to blame the lack of progress on any meaningful legislation for the last forty years, you can blame the embrace of the filibuster or filibluster or Phil E. Buster or whatever you want to call this piece of rancid piece of obstructionism, by both parties (or corporate ass-kissing syndicates as we call them here at the Bucket). A common excuse by Democrats for not voting in elections is “what’s the point”. They claim that there’s no difference between the two parties and that both worship at the altar of capitalism, which is true. But the Democrats have pushed forth legislation in the past like Social Security Act, the Civil Rights Act and Medicare which has truly helped millions of Americans. Biden’s Build Back Better program and the Voting Rights Act are important pieces of legislation that will help millions. The American people overwhelmingly support these bills, especially the ones for infrastructure. But for some strange reason, Ms. Sinema wants to preserve the vile, obstructionist wrench that is the filibuster. If we get rid of it and pass the bills, Sinema opines that when the next election comes around and Republicans take back the House and Senate, then they will pass all their right wing legislation and do whatever they want – just like they did to put Amy Coney Barrett and Brett Kavanaugh on the Supreme Court with a simple majority vote – with no consequences. But if the Democrats actually PASS THE BILLS AND DO SOMETHING, then maybe they won’t lose the elections. Maybe the electorate will realize the Democrats mean business and won’t roll over and play dead every time the GOP clear their throats like they’ve done for the past twenty years.

Yes folks, Ms. Sinema seems to have pulled the bait-and-switch with all us Arizonans who voted for her thinking she would pursue progressive values. But it appears she’s given in to pressure from corporate interests. Since we’re her constituents, we regularly receive email correspondence from her office proudly touting her work for Veteran’s Rights, which is good. But it’s also not controversial at all. We know of no one who is against giving Veterans aid or assistance. This is like saying that you support breathing. But yet on the vital issues like preserving the right to vote for every American, Ms. Sinema seems to be clueless or bought out by corporate interests or bought out by the GOP or all three. At least the Arizona Democratic Party has announced they are very upset with her support of the filibuster and are looking to other candidates like Ruben Gallego in 2024 when Sinema’s term expires. Her poll numbers are in the toilet and good luck getting the Republicans support if she switches parties. Sinema is just a sassy fool and useful tool right now for the GOP’s fascist agenda. One thing’s for sure: Ms. Cutesy Pie Bait-and-Switcher won’t be a Senator too much longer. Arizonans are already sick of her schtick . Citizens from across the nation are sick of her schtick . But at least she’ll have a job at Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, when she’s handed her walking papers in 2024. Then she can sip her sangria, buy more sassy grrrl clothes, count all her money and swoon at the thought of Phil E. Buster.

Update 1/22/22: The Arizona Democratic Party has censured Ms. Sinema. Will it do any good? Probably not, but it means that it is very likely she will have primary opponents in 2024.

For some strange reason, Arizona Senator Kyrsten Sinema seems to be enamored with the ugliest of Senate procedures, the filibuster (or Phil E. Buster) which prevents progress of any kind for the Democrat's Build Back Better and Voting Rights Act legislation. But at least this cheeky grrrl has sangria, sassy clothes, lots of money from corporate donors and new friends in the GOP.
For some strange reason, Arizona Senator Kyrsten Sinema seems to be enamored with the ugliest of Senate procedures, the filibuster (or Phil E. Buster) which prevents progress of any kind for the Democrat’s Build Back Better and Voting Rights Act legislation. But at least this cheeky grrrl has sangria, sassy clothes, lots of money from corporate donors and new friends in the GOP.
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GOP Baby Factories – a.k.a. Women

December 17, 2021 bb_admin Compassionate CONservatives, Corporate States of America, Grand Old Plutocrats, Holy Huckster Hijinx, Let Them Eat Cake, Neocon Media Circus, Teabagging **it

The right-wing dominated Supreme Court has shown their true intentions about abortion rights by recently letting stand severe abortion bans in Texas and Mississippi. We’ve been screaming about their intentions for years here at the Bucket. States with Republican leadership ranging from bible thumping states like South Dakota and Alabama to our home state of Arizona have been slowly chipping away at abortion rights over the last twenty years. Religious zealots have seized control of state and federal government and forced their horribly archaic, first century viewpoints upon the citizenry of the country because these holy huckster bible thumpers still view the woman as nothing more than a baby factory. If these people were truly pro-life, they’d realize that the woman’s life should come first. But then hypocrisy does seem to be commonplace with these sheeple. They claim to be pro-life but then fervently support gun rights. They claim to be pro-life but then violently protest getting a life saving vaccine against a disease that has claimed over 800,000 people in the US and over 5 million word wide.

We’re re-posting a photo-toon from January 11, 2006 when ol’ Dubya nominated Samuel Alito to the Supreme Court. This was the beginning of the end because since then, Alito, Thomas, Kavanaugh and Coney Barrett (the Handmaiden’s Justice) have formed a staunch conservative religious bloc on the court that not only wants to force women through unwanted pregnancies but also to knock down the wall between church and state, thus forcing all of us to adhere to outdated, biblical philosophy whether we like it or not. Like we’ve stated before, we’re regressing rapidly toward America becoming the Holy Corporate Empire.

Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito displays the only tool (a wire hanger)which will enable a woman to terminate a pregnancy once he's on the bench.
Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito displays the only tool which will enable a woman to terminate a pregnancy once he’s on the bench.
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The Handmaiden Justice

October 21, 2020 bb_admin Compassionate CONservatives, Con-a-thon 2020, Corporate States of America, Grand Old Plutocrats, Holy Huckster Hijinx, Let Them Eat Cake, Neocon Media Circus, Puritan Pence, Teabagging **it

While many Americans need desperate relief from the disastrous effects of the on-going coronavirus pandemic, what do the Senate Republicans do? They hold confirmation hearing for their super religious handmaiden justice candidate, Amy Coney Barrett. In the first week of hearings, Ms. Barrett certainly did nothing to allay Democrats’ fears about her abolishing abortion rights, LGBTQ rights, voting rights, delaying the election, eliminating Obamacare and blocking any kind of legislation for regulating climate change. She repeated didn’t answer Democrats’ questions pertaining to these subjects. Propagandists over at Fox Propaganda Network openly proclaimed that her notebook was blank, meaning she was so sharp she didn’t need notes. Well, when you don’t answer any of the Democratic Senators’ questions, we guess you don’t need any notes. As far as we’re concerned, her brain was as blank as her notebook and her sanctimonious, holier-than-thou stare.

But there is little the Democrats can do. Ms. Barrett’s confirmation is pretty much a done deal and it will probably put her on the bench right before Election Day. Gee, how convenient! And Republicans keep stating over and over that they’re worried about Joe Biden packing the court if he gets elected when that’s exactly what they’ve done for the past twenty years. Al Gore won the popular vote in 2000 and yet George W. Bush got to pick two conservative justices (Roberts and Alito). Hillary Clinton won the popular vote in 2016 and yet Donald Trump got to pick three conservative judges (Gorsuch, Kavanaugh and now Barrett), not to mention Mitch McConnell refusing to hold confirmation hearings for Merrick Garland, who should rightfully be occupying a seat on the Court. So that’s five conservative judges where there should have been five left leaning or moderate judges; all stolen by Republican shenanigans the past twenty years.

We’ve got a lot of problems with Ms. Barrett’s confirmation and the main reason is because she is obviously very religious and will no doubt let her religious brain washing influence her decision making. Confession time: Editor-in-chief Dex Rexter was raised catholic (and is happily far removed from that ‘cult’, as he calls it) and knows very well the holier-than-thou type that Ms. Barrett obviously is. When Ms. Barrett refused to answer questions and gave the world her blank stare, this is a typical reaction of everyone who was raised catholic and is questioned about their beliefs. All christians are taught to have the victim mentality, meaning that whenever they are questioned about their beliefs or faith, they envision themselves as martyrs; St. Sebastian tied up, pierced with arrows or St. Joan of Arc being burned at the stake. The questions don’t matter because in her brain washed mind, she is doing God’s work and everyone who rightfully questions underlying motives are just heathens slinging their arrows and swinging their torches. This God Delusion (see Richard Dawkins), is enormously dangerous for sane, logical, rational people with education based on scientific facts and reasoning. We’ve mentioned this before; the people who wrote the bible knew nothing compared to what we modern day humans know. The biblical 1st century database is minute compared to the colossal 21st century database chock full of scientific facts and data. Why anyone would still let dogma written before the 19th century influence their lives is beyond comprehension. The only behavioral rule people need to follow is the law of reciprocity or the golden rule, which pre-dates the foundations of judasim, chrisitianity and islam. The ten commandments are just the golden rule stated ten times.

So there you have it. The modern day handmaiden Amy Coney Barrett will stomp all over Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s legacy and more than likely mark the return of back alley abortions, make it tougher for people to afford healthcare, ignore and vilify scientific consensus and make it difficult for any person who is different (translation: anyone who isn’t a straight christian) to get a break in America. Of course, if she is confirmed before election day, she may even rule, with her fellow religious, conservative zealots on the bench, that Donald Trump will somehow get to stay President even though he and all his Republican sycophants are getting slammed in the polls and could be in for a blood bath on election day. Like we’ve said before; get ready for the Holy Corporate Empire, folks.

With a blank notebook, stare and brain, Supreme Court nominee and modern day handmaiden Amy Coney Barrett proudly announces her desire to implement outdated, regressive 1st century dogma on a 21st century society as Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence becomes overstimulated.
With a blank notebook, stare and brain, Supreme Court nominee and modern day handmaiden Amy Coney Barrett proudly announces her desire to implement outdated, regressive 1st century dogma on a 21st century society as Vice President and modern day Puritan Mike Pence becomes overstimulated.
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The John Lewis Bridge

July 29, 2020 bb_admin Compassionate CONservatives, From The Editor, Grand Old Plutocrats, Meme-ries

Congressman and Civil Rights icon John Lewis of Georgia recently passed away at the age of 80. Congressman Lewis was an exemplary citizen who selflessly served not only his district but the entire country. Lewis was part of the infamous Bloody Sunday protest back in 1965, when peaceful protesters, led by Lewis and Martin Luther King Jr. attempted to cross the Edmund Pettus Bridge in Selma, Alabama but were brutally beaten by law enforcement officials and racist provocateurs.

There is now a movement to rename the Edmund Pettus Bridge to the John Lewis Bridge. This seems like a no-brainer to us here at the Bucket. Edmund Pettus was a former Confederate Army officer who also was a grand dragon in the Ku Klux Klan. The people of Alabama can continue to embrace their racist, Confederate, KKK past or march into the 21st century and rename the bridge to honor John Lewis, who wanted peace and opportunity for all humans, no matter their race, creed or color.

The citizens of Alabama should build a bridge to the 21st century by renaming the Edmund Pettus Bridge to the John Lewis Bridge in honor of the late congressman and Civil Rights icon.
The citizens of Alabama should build a bridge to the 21st century by renaming the Edmund Pettus Bridge to the John Lewis Bridge in honor of the late congressman and Civil Rights icon.
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MÆGAMORONS: They Need Manicures!

April 25, 2020 bb_admin Compassionate CONservatives, Corporate States of America, Grand Old Plutocrats, Holy Huckster Hijinx, Meme-ries, Neocon Media Circus, Teabagging **it

We’re still shaking our heads at the stupidity of the MÆGAMorons or Teabaggers 2.0 and their insipid open up the country protests, despite the still rising number of cases of COVID-19 across the country and the world. The reason: they miss getting haircuts and manicures. These idiots, who’ve prided themselves that they collected enough rations to survive for years in the coming apocalypse, can’t make it a month on moderate social distancing. This shutdown isn’t to take away our freedoms; it’s for the safety of all Americans so we don’t get this nasty disease which currently has a 7 percent death rate worldwide. Like we stated in our previous post, should we protest when the weather service issues a tornado warning. It’s almost hurricane season; should we just ignore hurricane warnings because they infringe upon our freedoms for a while. This shutdown isn’t permanent, folks. If we can keep a lid on things until June, there’s a good chance the second wave, which will be coming, won’t be quite so bad.

But nooooooooo! States like Georgia and Michigan have already started to open things up. People flocked to beaches in southern California. We just hope that if these people do get sick, they won’t bother to go to the hospital. Just let your local Republican know that you gave your life for the economy and we’ll sure they’ll remember your sacrifice.

MÆGAMorons: Goddamn it! They need manicures!
MÆGAMorons: Goddamn it! They need manicures!
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Trump Supporters: Bat Shit Insane

April 23, 2020 bb_admin Compassionate CONservatives, Corporate States of America, Grand Old Plutocrats, Holy Huckster Hijinx, In Guns We Trust, Let Them Eat Cake, Meme-ries, Neocon Media Circus, Teabagging **it

In our previous post we commented about America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and ‘stable genius’ Donald Trump and his mind boggling, head spinning pivots on authority for opening up the coronavirus during the COVID-19 pandemic. One day he says he has authority, the next day he says the governors have authority and then the day after that he encourages civil war by urging his brain dead troglodyte followers to LIBERATE their respective states.

Yes, lets talk briefly about these bat shit insane boneheads who don’t like being told to follow safety precautions to save their own lives. It’s basically the stupid Teabagger movement redux. The corporate media is doing the same thing they did ten years ago – a small group of idiots, armed to the teeth, band together and protest common sense and the corporate media foams at the mouth and gives them top story coverage. That’s because there are some insidious right wing conservative groups behind the lock down protests with solid connections to the anything-for-profit media. In contrast, tens of thousands of people have peacefully and non-violently protested the vile, oppressive policies of the Trump administration and the Republicans and the corporate media gives them barely a passing mention. Un-f*cking-believable!

But the stupidity of these MÆGAMorons is off the charts on the bat shit insanity meter. These shutdown orders are to save your lives not to inconvenience you. What’s next? These idiots will protest taking shelter during a tornado warning because it violates their constitutional freedom. There were even signs among the protesters that proclaimed “My body, my choice.” But yet these same assholes are perfectly fine with the government telling a woman what to do with her uterus. What colossal dumbass hypocrites! These people are actually choosing to be exposed to a debilitating disease which may kill them or kill their loved ones; all in order to maybe bump the stock market up a few points and keep our plutocratic overlords wealthy. Un-f*cking-believable!

But then Las Vegas mayor Carolyn Goodman topped all the stupid meters by suggesting a Hunger Games type scenario where all the casinos open up and the ones who have the least amount of COVID-19 cases, win. Ahhh! The wonderful, magical free market! We’re getting tired of saying un-f*cking-believable so we’ll just say this: when it comes to the bat shit insane MÆGAMorons versus the coronavirus – we’re rooting for the virus. Natural selection, take them away!

A bat shit insane Trump supporter or MÆGAMorons proudly defies orders to take shelter from a killer tornado to preserve his constitutional freedom.
Trump supporters or MÆGAMorons have made it clear that they will not tolerate any ‘guvment’ orders which may violate their constitutional freedom even if it’s to save their moronic, bat shit insane lives.
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Trump: Bat Shit Insane

April 20, 2020 bb_admin America's CEO/Dictator, Compassionate CONservatives, Corporate States of America, Grand Old Plutocrats, In Guns We Trust, Let Them Eat Cake, Meme-ries, Neocon Media Circus, Teabagging **it

Another day, another bat shit insane action by America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump and his army of mindless sycophants. This time, Trump performed head revolutions worthy of the demon from The Exorcist. At the beginning of last week, Trump proclaimed that the ultimate authority laid with him in the reopening of America’s businesses, in shut down due to the coronavirus pandemic currently ravaging the world’s human population. This predictably produced much backlash from people who like the Constitution, law and order, democracy, science, logic and reason. Like Dr. Fauci had said previously, Trump just can’t tell the virus when it has to stop; we don’t set the timetable. So, on this past Thursday Trumpty Dumpty made an announcement stating the ultimate authority on reopening the economy should lie with the governor of each individual state.

You would think that Trump thumpers, being states rights advocates and all that, would have rejoiced. But nooooooooo! Reminiscent of the teabagger movement from ten years ago, armed idiots took to the streets on Friday in states such as Michigan, Ohio and Kentucky proclaiming loudly to all that they will not follow shutdown orders; that it violates their constitutional rights. To make matters ridiculous, our megalomaniac dear Leader tweeted for these ‘very responsible people’ to LIBERATE their respective states, effectively nullifying his statement of the previous day. These aren’t the actions of a level headed, clear minded, logical leader. These are the actions of a bat shit insane, narcissistic asshole who has no regard for human life.

There has been more than 40,000 lives lost in the last two months due to COVID-19. Our leaders should be taking this seriously. The goal should be reopening the country when we have proper testing available so more people won’t fall victim to the virus. But what does Florida governor Rick DeSantis do? He reopens beaches around Jacksonville while Florida is still getting slammed by the virus. The conservative Republicans values have been exposed for all to see and. . . surprise, surprise. . . the only thing they care about is money, wealth and power.

America's Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump demonstrates the bat shit insanity that has endeared him to his equally bat shit insane followers.
America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump demonstrates the bat shit insanity that has endeared him to his equally bat shit insane followers.
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Those Poor, Poor Millionaires

February 24, 2012 bb_admin Articles:Corporate BS, Corporate States of America, Let Them Eat Cake

Continuing with our Corporate BS retrospective…This article is from our March 13th, 2005 issue, back when then President Bush signed the ‘Tort Reform’ bill. Never forget folks: corporations are the most important ‘people’ in America.

Bush’s Tort Reform Aids Poor, Defenseless Corporations

President Bush came to the rescue of poor American corporations recently when he signed into law the so called ‘Tort Reform’ bill which places limits on class action lawsuits placed against corporations.

“This is a momentous occasion for my corporate benefactors,” said Bush. “From now on, our poor, defenseless American corporations will never be fleeced by greedy, money-grubbing consumers who are out to screw our decent CEOs out of their hard earned millions.”

Sally Whitman, spokesperson of Drugzilla, one of America’s leading pharmaceutical companies, praised the legislation. “This bill is a godsend. I’m so sick of people complaining, ‘Oh, this medicine caused me to break out in a rash’, ‘This medicine made my child vomit’, ‘This medicine killed my husband’. Has anyone heard of the phrase, ‘Buyer Beware’? No one held a gun to your head to take the medicine. A doctor’s prescription doesn’t necessarily have to be followed, people.”

Dr. Ted Cargill said, “This is great for all us doctors who’ve ever had to worry about malpractice suits. Now when I mistakenly amputate a patient’s right leg instead of the left leg, I won’t have to suffer any consequences, like losing my license to practice medicine, my membership at the country club or my Porsche. God, I’d die if I lost my Porsche.”

Lawrence T. Juggers, President and CEO of Juggermart, said, “Now I don’t have to put up with employee complaints of working them over forty hours a week. They’ll work when I want them to work. When I say jump, they’ll say ‘How high, Mr. Juggers?’ I bet I can even get away with paying less than minimum wage now. That means maybe I can get vacation home number ten. I’m thinking a nice little hideaway in Aruba will do nicely.”

Consumer advocate, Clarence Simons, said, “This is disastrous for the average American. While it may be true there are a few tort lawyers who abuse the system, the majority of the cases brought before the state courts are legitimate. Now that the tort cases will be brought before federal courts, the likelihood of a case being dismissed will be greater. The consumer stands the chance of not having any retribution if they purchase a faulty product, have a conflict with an employer or are harmed by defective drugs. They will have no rights.”

Americans seemed ambivalent about the bill. Jenny Miller of Madison, Wisconsin, said, “I welcome corporate slavery. I don’t mind working an extra five, ten or twenty hours a week for my boss. I mean he doesn’t pay me more but there are benefits. He lets me take an extra donut every morning. I’d say that more than makes up for it.”

James S. Quinton, of Atlanta, Georgia, said, “Well I was going to sue Dr. Jamieson’s ass for giving me a sex change operation instead of a vasectomy. But I guess I can get used to wearing pantyhose and heels. I hope my wife doesn’t mind if I use hers.”

Ernest Jefferson, of Houston, Texas, who lost his life savings in the Enron scandal, said, “When I say the word, can you kick the chair I’m standing on out from underneath my legs. Thank you.”

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