The Joker

Joaquin Phoenix’s new movie Joker has opened to rave reviews and large box office projections for his performance as a mentally defective wanna-be comedian who becomes a psychotic super villain spreading chaos and disorder everywhere he goes.

In eerily parallel reality, American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump continues to be a mentally defective wanna-be world leader who has led America into a world of chaos that threatens the very tenets of democracy and is ripping this country to shreds while simultaneously ruining our country’s standing on the world stage.

Apparently these days, Americans seem to be obsessed with psychotic sociopaths who want to create chaos.

Joker: Not to be outdone by Joaquin Phoenix, American CEO/Dictator and 'stable genius' Donald Trump releases his own Joker movie where he promises law and order but delivers chaos that promotes hatred and violence thus threatening to rip apart the democratic institutions on which the nation was founded. Rated R for Repulsive.
Joker: Not to be outdone by Joaquin Phoenix, American CEO/Dictator and ‘stable genius’ Donald Trump releases his own Joker movie where he promises law and order but delivers chaos that promotes hatred and violence thus threatening to rip apart the democratic institutions on which the nation was founded. Rated R for Repulsive.

Non-CONSERVation CONSERVatives

America’s CEO/Dictator and distraction generator Donald Trump succeeded again last week in weakening environmental regulations which only benefit industry. We’ve commented ad infinitum about the Republican’s war on science and the environment (Browse through our There’s No Planet B category). They’ve made it no secret that they favor the polluting gas, coal and oil industries over alternative green energy. Just look at the rollbacks of EPA regulations in his first two and a half years in office. The system works like this: Trump distracts the public with mind boggling inane, insipid and stupid comments on Twitter. The compliant and unfocused media takes the bait hook, line and sinker. Trump’s Republican cronies dismantle all those ‘pesky regulations’ or laws which protect us and opens the doors for greedy, selfish, materialistic, capitalistic pigs to plunder the public lands at their heart’s content.

Last week, Trump weakened the endangered species laws considerably. The fact that humans have killed off a whopping 60% of animal species on the planet since 1970 doesn’t matter to modern conservative Republicans, many of whom are religious nutbags and believe that God made the world for us to plunder and that science is nothing but a hoax. According the Union of Concerned Scientists, the Trump has launched over 100 assaults on science so far, the same number Dubya accumulated in eight years. But the only thing that matters to these selfish capitalist pigs is profit in their bank account and stock portfolios. Mike Pompeo has even stated that the ice melting in the Arctic is a good thing because it opens more shipping lanes. That’s right, folks – screw the polar bear, there’s money to be made.

Part of the problem is that capitalism has taken over the globe. In order for capitalism to succeed, it needs rampant consumption by consumers. Of course, these leads to a rampant increase in junk, garbage and debris. With lax environmental laws, people can just dump their stuff anywhere. Our planet is being inundated with plastics, electronic waste and garbage of all types. So in other words, unregulated capitalism is killing our planet.

Like we’ve commented before, what makes this so aggravating is that so many conservatives are somehow against conservation. How can that be? They didn’t use to be. Republicans like Teddy Roosevelt passed some of our most powerful environmental laws. Richard Nixon established the EPA and signed the Endangered Species Act into law. By the very definition of the word, they should be all for conserving resources, wildlife and nature. Modern day conservative Republicans, led by the Trump administration, are nothing but hypocrites when it comes to the environment.

There are many good environmental sites out there. The Kiwireport has a pictorial of shocking pictures of environmental destruction covering the globe. Warning: some pictures are extremely disturbing, especially if you love wildlife and nature. We’ve used a few in our photo-toon below. We urge people to wake up and support fully conservation efforts in your region. Like the environmentalists say: think globally, act locally. The health and welfare of Earth, the only planet we know of that supports life, depends on it.

Somehow American conservatives are against conservation which makes them colossal hypocrites of the highest magnitude.
Somehow, American conservatives are against conservation which makes them colossal hypocrites of the highest magnitude.

The Last Responder

The Trump presidency continues on its catastrophic way while America’s CEO/Dictator, pathological prevaricator and man with a perpetual case of liarrhea, Donald Trump, keeps spinning more lies, delusions and deceptions to the American people. The Washington Post lie counter is well over 12,000 and the petulant man child shows no sign of letting up. He really has a penchant for alternative facts and alternative history as well like his Battle of Yorktown Airport speech just last month. As we’ve noted before, his cronies also serve up a heaping helping of distracting flak as well.

In keeping with his history of distraction, Donald Trump recently regaled the media and a group of first responders with tales of how he was actually at Ground Zero after 9/11 helping out the firefighters despite there being no actual evidence that he did anything. He also claimed to have predicted 9/11, saw thousands of Muslims celebrating and saw people jumping from the Twin Towers from his penthouse. All false statements. Of course, facts don’t matter to Trump or to his supporters. Anytime someone accuses him of stretching the truth he projects, like his conservative Republican cohorts, and calls the real news ‘Fake News’, while everything that spews forth from his gaping maw is ‘the truth’. This is red meat to his troll like followers. If Trump said 2+2=4 is fake, his followers would blindly follow. And as we’ve seen, when he speaks hateful rhetoric like ‘go back to where they came from’, his followers load up their guns and take aim.

So, let’s delve into that warped mind that is Donald Trump. Let’s imagine what it was like on that fateful day back on September 11, 2001, when Golden Man of Truth, Donald Trump, the muscles of his sculptured body rippling, stepped to the forefront upon a piece of wreckage and proclaimed to the weary firefighters, “Follow me, boys”; and then proceeded to save the soul of not only New Yorkers but all Americans. It’s all there folks, in Donald Trump’s imagination.

America’s CEO/Dictator, pathological prevaricator and man with a perpetual case of liarrhea, Donald Trump, recently regaled the masses with the story of how on 9/11, he stepped to the forefront and bravely led the first responders in rescuing many New Yorkers and saving the soul of America.
America’s CEO/Dictator, pathological prevaricator and man with a perpetual case of liarrhea, Donald Trump, recently regaled the masses with the story of how on 9/11, he stepped to the forefront and bravely led the first responders in rescuing many New Yorkers and saving the soul of America.

Moscow Mitch; Or Moscow’s Bitch

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, a.k.a. Turtle Boy, has been in the headlines a lot lately. Apparently poor little Mitchy doesn’t like his new nickname, ‘Moscow Mitch’, given to him for his refusal to pass election security bills that would ensure Russia doesn’t interfere with the 2020 elections like they did in 2016. Why would anyone, especially a United States Senator, want a hostile foreign nation to interfere with our democratic elections?

Well, Turtle Boy knows that without Russian help, Republicans have no hope of winning. Ever since 1988, Republicans have only won the popular vote in the presidential elections once – that’s right folks – one time(2004). The only reason they’re even competitive in the House of Representatives is because districts are so gerrymandered by GOP controlled states that Republicans have a distinct advantage over Democratic candidates. Even Robert Mueller warned of Russian interference in his recent testimony before the House Judiciary Committee. The Russians hacked elections in all fifty states in 2016. Furthermore, Moscow Mitch knew about it and still did nothing to stop it in 2016 and he will continue to nothing about it because Moscow Mitch places the Republican party above country.

Moscow Mitch also has dubious ties to Russia in that Kentucky has gotten some pretty sweet deals from Russian oligarchs. Yes, Moscow Mitch has sold out his country for fun and profit and yet he has the audacity to accuse Democrats and media outlets of ‘modern day McCarthyism’. How is this dipshit still getting elected despite an approval rating in the thirties in his home state of Kentucky? Maybe its because voting machine companies donate heavily to his coffers. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen; Corporate America has fixed it so Moscow Mitch gets elected time and time again because . . . you know. . . corporations are people, too. Thanks Supreme Court!

So, poor wittle Turtle Boy better get used to being called Moscow Mitch because he will be called Moscow Mitch up until he loses his seat next November. But fear not; after he loses, at least Moscow Mitch can move to Russia to stay with Vladimir Putin and his Russian oligarch pals.

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, a.k.a ‘Turtle Boy’, whines about his new nickname 'Moscow Mitch' while his boss Russian President Vladimir Putin suggests a more appropriate moniker.
Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, a.k.a ‘Turtle Boy’, whines about his new nickname ‘Moscow Mitch’ while his boss Russian President Vladimir Putin suggests a more appropriate moniker.

The British Trump

The United States isn’t the only country being overrun by right wing conservatives seizing control of the power structures. Many countries throughout the world have seen hard line conservative parties gain power and predictably are establishing authoritarian measures to make sure they stay in power. This past week, conservative Boris Johnson became the new Prime Minister in the United Kingdom. Johnson has been described as the British Donald Trump . . .you know . . . narcissistic womanizer with not a bit of intelligence. We thought that the U.K. went off the deep end when they voted for Brexit. With Boris Johnson taking the helm, we’re pretty sure the sun has set on the British Empire.

So, what is behind the rise of all these right wing, authoritarian conservative gaining power throughout the western world? Could Russian President Vladimir Putin have something to do with the rise of authoritarianism and the decline of western democracies? We’re thinking, yes. Modern day Russia is basically a corrupt oligarchy, where only the rich and powerful have a say so in how the country is run. Since the fall of communism and the Soviet Union in the early ’90s, Russia has gone through some pretty rough years which has given rise to the oligarchs. Putin was pretty peeved that his country lost the Cold War. But the former KGB operative is intelligent and very clever. Over the past twenty years, he and the deep pocketed Russian oligarchs have systematically used capitalism as a weapon against the western capitalist democracies and, as we’re seeing now, to devastating effect. They know that one common trait among all capitalistic countries is greed; the life’s blood of capitalism. There are any number of egotistical, power hungry people in western democracies who’d sell out their own mother for money, wealth and power. Trump’s connections to Russia are well known despite his protests and denials. Boris Johnson also has conflicts. Other countries have also shown a susceptibility to make corrupt deals with Russia.

In his testimony to Congress this past week, Robert Mueller explicitly warned that Russia interfered in the 2016 election and is on it’s way to mucking up our elections in 2020. And the Mueller report also states that Trump openly welcomed Russian interference (there are videos of Trump openly asking Russia to hack Hillary Clinton’s emails). Russian oligarchs have used corrupt, crony capitalism to amass their considerable fortunes and they will spare no expense supporting the best hackers available in undermining our democratic institutions. And yet Mitch McConnell blocked legislation that would provide protection against hacking in the upcoming election. We guess Turtle Boy knows that the Republicans can’t win again without Russia’s help.

So Britain now has it’s own Donald Trump. We here at the Bucket see Putin as a James Bond Super Villain who dispenses helpful hints for those wanting to remake western democracies into Putin-style oligarchies. All you have to do is buy off wacky haired, egotistical, narcissistic, populist, capitalist megalomaniacs like Boris Johnson and Trump, who love money, fame and power. Oh, and don’t forget those wacky haired communist leaders like Kim Jong Un.

Russian President and James Bond Super Villain, Vladimir Putin, recently dispensed a helpful hint for those wishing to control the world: buy off men who are narcissistic megalomaniacs with wacky hairdos.
Russian President and James Bond Super Villain, Vladimir Putin, recently dispensed a helpful hint for those wishing to control the world: buy off men who are narcissistic megalomaniacs with wacky hairdos.

The Swamp Keeper

One of Donald Trump’s biggest promises during the 2016 election was that he would drain the swamp. The fact of the matter is that he hasn’t drained the swamp at all but, to the contrary, has restocked it with industry insiders, lobbyists and Wall Street plutocrats who have every intention of bringing down the government while filling up their own coffers. One of these swamp creatures is Wilbur Ross, who we’ve commented on before on his willing ignorance of Saudi customs and the plight of the modern day middle class.

Well, it turns out that Wilbuuuuurrr is being held in contempt of court, along with Attorney General Bill Barr, for his role in trying to get an illegal citizenship question on the census. America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man child, Donald Trump, has been none too happy with this filthy rich plutocrat and rumors are swirling that Ross’s days in the cabinet may be through.

But fear not Wilbuuuuurrr fans. We’ve noticed that this filthy rich plutocrat bear a striking resemblance to the Cryptkeeper from the classic anthology series Tales from the Crypt. We have no doubt that if Hollywood decides to reboot this series, Ross would be a natural. He’s already shown adeptness at keeping the swamp in Washington D.C.; we’re sure he’ll be able to entertain all the boils and ghouls with his rapid fire wit and ghastly puns.

Commerce Secretary, plutocrat and swamp creature, Wilbur Ross, bears a striking resemblance to the Cryptkeeper and has even developed his own punny quips to nauseate all the boils and ghouls.
Commerce Secretary, plutocrat and swamp creature, Wilbur Ross, bears a striking resemblance to the Cryptkeeper and has even developed his own punny quips to nauseate all the boils and ghouls.

The Battle of Yorktown Airport

One of the most amusing things that’s happened since we’ve been on break is the Independence Day celebration in Washington D.C. with special guest ‘speaker’, America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man child, Donald Trump. To his credit, the speech wasn’t partisan and the expected military parade complete with tanks rolling down the parade route didn’t materialize. But Trump’s speech was pure. . .Trumpian.

In it, he rambled on about the Revolutionary War and managed to mangle the history of this country beyond recognition, juxtaposing events of the War of 1812 with the Battle of Yorktown from the Revolutionary War and inexplicably linking both with the taking of airports. Watch a video of this mess. Of course, Trump blamed it all on his teleprompter.

The nightmarish thing about this travesty is that Donald Trump is still President of the United States. Yes folks; the embarrassment continues unabated thanks to our feckless members of congress who refuse to remove this clown from office.

In the meantime, let’s revel in Trump’s alternative facts history, when George Washington and his band of patriots bravely saved a Starbucks at Terminal 2 of Yorktown Airport from certain destruction and celebrated with victory caffè lattes for all.

America's CEO/Dictator Donald Trump recently regaled the masses with the story of the Battle of Yorktown Airport when George Washington and his band of patriots bravely saved a Starbucks at Terminal 2 from certain destruction and celebrated with victory caffè lattes for all.
America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump recently regaled the masses with the story of the Battle of Yorktown Airport when George Washington and his band of patriots bravely saved a Starbucks at Terminal 2 from certain destruction and celebrated with victory caffè lattes for all.

Chillaxing For A Spell

America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump continues his relentless assault on democratic principles and as usual during the debacle that is the Trump presidency, we’re having a hard time keeping up with all the crap. Just in the past week there’s been reports of more migrant deaths in the concentration camps set up by Republicans, Trump almost started a war with Iran over suspicious claims of a tanker attack and a new press secretary has been named to replace Sarah *uckabee Sanders and for some strange reason, it’s not Sergeant Schultz. We thought he’d be a natural.

It’s been a while since we’ve taken a break, so we’re taking a little time to chillax and recharge our batteries from this non-stop bombardment on truth, honesty, logic, reason and democracy by the orange haired man-child and his feckless, flying monkey Republican goon squad. We’ll be back next month.

Gone Fishin' - Be Back Soon!
We’re taking a break America. We’ll be back real soon.

Religion: Humanity’s Security Blanket

If you’ve read any post or articles on this site, you know that we’re atheists. Our world view is solidly connected to a 21st century database of logic, reason and scientific knowledge obtained by thorough scientific methods and inquiry. Adherents to religion on the other hand, seem solidly connected to 1st century, 6th century or x century databases that may have made sense in those antiquated times, but given our advanced knowledge of the universe surrounding us, are now woefully obsolete.

Proponents of religion also claim that only they have the answers to life’s questions. Inevitably it boils to certain individuals in the upper echelons of the religious organizations who want to completely control their adherents or sheeple. History has many examples of bloody wars between adherents of one ‘faith’ disagreeing with followers of another leaving nothing but death and scorched earth behind. Many religions state that God made man in his image and that God created the Earth with man as ruler over all other animals. This directly conflicts with scientific evidence uncovered in the last three hundred years which concludes that man created God (or Odin or Zeus or Iron Man. . .pick you favorite fictitious deity) in his image and has used God and capitalism to commandeer and take control of the planet for fun and profit. Even the authoritarian dictator Napoleon commented that “Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet. Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich.” That’s why there are so many wolves in sheep’s clothing out there making a killing off of the gullible sheeple. There’s also a link between religion and vaccine refusal. So people are dying unnecessarily because the religious leaders are telling their flock to trust prayer (basically thinking good thoughts) over science.

We would think that modern day humans would see religion for what it is: a bloody, soiled security blanket to give us a warm fuzzy about capitalistic, materialistic life on this planet. All you really need to live an ethical and moral life is adherence to the golden rule or the law of reciprocity, which predates christianity or any other modern religions. Treat other people the way you want to be treated. You don’t need to tithe or give money to evangelical preachers so they can buy private jets to spread the gospel or ‘talk to God’. Just be kind and respect your fellow human beings and like Jesus (who was a human being, not a god) taught, share with others and help them when you can. Most major religions have this in their dogma. We’ll even go a step further and say respect animals and nature. The fact that so many evangelical rapture enthusiasts are salivating for complete destruction of the Earth, should be proof that they are insane. Why would anyone who loved God want to ruin his ‘ultimate creation’? And how can conservatives be against conservation? Given the knowledge we’ve obtained about the universe in the last three hundred years, the most important thing a human can do is maintain and preserve life on Earth. There is no planet B, folks. Since we’ve taken over the planet, it is up to us to preserve the life on it.

We’ve talked before that the best spaceship is our own planet. We need to stop being greedy materialists and live within our means. In the words of Henry David Thoreau, “Simplify, Simplify”. We need to listen to modern day scientists. They know what they’re talking about. We need to attenuate our consumption and more importantly reduce the human population using the ethical means of birth control and contraception. By doing this, we can lessen our carbon footprint, decrease our pollution and in general, return the planet to a healthy equilibrium. Ridding ourselves of the antiquated dogmas of religion and embracing environmental science will also go a long way to preserving all life on planet Earth.

Denizens of Earth continue to wrap themselves in the bloody, soiled security blanket of religion putting the health and welfare of the planet in jeopardy.
Denizens of Earth continue to wrap themselves in the bloody, soiled security blanket of religion putting the health and welfare of the planet in jeopardy.

London Bawling

America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump just returned from a trip across the pond and to hear our man-baby-in-chief talk about it, it was a smashing success. Of course, the truth is somewhat different. As usual, Trump made many gaffes and ridiculous claims. He even had time to trash Bette Midler on Twitter, the platform of twits. The orange haired megalomaniac looked like Al Bundy in his tuxedo at a formal dinner. But probably the most egregious is the utter delusion he had of his own popularity. There were thousands who came out and protested Trump, complete with the Trump baby balloon, which accurately depicts our petulant toddler in all his diapered glory. But Trump said that they weren’t protesters; they were ‘fake news’.

We also have no doubt that with Trump’s colossal ego, he somehow thought D-day meant Donald’s Day and that everyone in the world was there to celebrate all the glory and wonder that is Donald Trump. As we’ve noted before, to think that in the span of fifty years, the Republican party has gone from a true hero in Dwight D. Eisenhower, to a world leader pretend like Donald Trump is nauseating, excruciating and revolting.

America's CEO/Dictator and petulant man-baby, Donald Trump, whines that the protesters that greeted him in London were actually fans there to celebrate D-Day, which of course means Donald's Day.
America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man-baby, Donald Trump, whines that the protesters that greeted him in London were actually fans there to celebrate D-Day, which of course means Donald’s Day.