So Much Vice, GOP Acquits Twice

The second impeachment trial of America’s former CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump has concluded and to no one’s surprise, he was acquitted, despite a 57-43 vote of guilty. Seven GOP Senators voted for rule of law over party joining all fifty Democrats in saying that Trump incited the riots on January 6th because . . . of course he did. We all saw it on tape!

What’s especially galling is the statement from minority leader Moscow Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell made after the vote, which takes the cake for unethical hypocrisy. He basically said that Trump was guilty of provoking the insurrection and should be held accountable. And how do we do that? You impeach the bastard! But no, no, no… Turtle Boy voted to acquit. So, in a nutshell, Trump and the Republicans got away with their malfeasance like they’ve done for the last four years. There was one time Trump told the truth in his whole time as leader of the GOP and that was when he stated he could shoot somebody on 5th Ave and still not lose any supporters. He just incited an insurrection on the Capitol of the United States of America and five people died and several more were injured . . . and he got away with it without losing supporters. And the supposed party of moral responsibility allowed him to do so. If there was any doubt that the GOP is an unethical, immoral, corrupt, crime syndicate of greedy hooligans and grifters before the trial, then all skepticism should be obliterated by this decision. They openly support authoritarian fascist actions to overthrow democracy and install permanent Republican rule.

Speaking of immoral grifters, one of our least favorite humans on the planet passed away, Boss Limhogg himself, Rush Limbaugh. We posted a photo-toon last year that pretty much sums up our feelings about that obnoxious, racist, sexist tub of goo. In short: Rot in hell, El Rushblo!

Oozing with incandescent charisma, Moscow Mitch 'Turtle Boy' McConnell bravely acquits former CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump of responsibility for inciting the Capitol riots despite proclaiming that he was guilty as hell.
Oozing with incandescent charisma, Moscow Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell bravely acquits former CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump of responsibility for inciting the Capitol riots despite proclaiming that he was guilty as hell.

StonkMarketStop

One of the more intriguing recent developments has been the whole GameStop story and how a bunch of neophyte traders on Reddit spanked the greedy hedge fund pirate plutocrats of Wall Street and beat them at their own game.

We won’t go into depth on explaining what happened. We’ll let this article explain the proceedings. Or you can let Tom Tomorrow at This Modern World explain it in cartoon format. But in a nutshell, a group of investors on Reddit, a group called WallStreetBets or WSB, decided they were going to teach the greedy hedge fund managers a lesson. One tactic hedge fund managers use is to short sell stocks. They look for stocks that are failing and basically bet that they’ll continue to die. So they borrow shares to sell and buy all the stock at a lower price before paying off their lender and usually make a fortune. GameStop is a brick-and-mortar video game retailer whose days are numbered because of online video gaming and the pandemic, so they were on the hedge funders lists of future profits. But WSB stepped in and bought stock so that the stock price rose precipitously, which means that the hedge fund managers, who were betting that the stock prices would fall, lost money, BIG TIME. We’re talking billions of dollars. The trend continued for other failing businesses like AMC, Bed Bath and Beyond, and Blockbuster, whose stock price rose 3,990% in a week.

If you say this sounds like rigging the system like that of a casino, you are absolutely right. The WSB people showed that the hedge fund managers have been using Wall Street as a casino for years to get filthy rich with absolutely no repercussions. Of course, now that WSB did the same thing, plutocrats are crying foul and proclaiming that there needs to be regulations in place. You see, only plutocrats are supposed to win money on the stock market, while the rest of us working stiffs just work our asses off making these avaricious assholes richer. So, the greedy corporatists are fine with no regulations until they’re beaten at their own game and then they cry like babies.

We’re looking forward to see what kind of regulations Senators like Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders have in store for the greedy fat cat capitalists in the next couple years. It could get interesting, folks.

A well heeled member of the plutocracy expresses his utter disdain that common peons are making money at the Wall Street casino.
A well heeled member of the plutocracy expresses his utter disdain that common peons are making money at the Wall Street casino.

The Force Is Strong In This One

One of the best things about twice Impeached former CEO/Dictator Donald Trump being out of office is not waking up every morning in a cold sweat fearing what asinine thing the petulant man child tweeted at three o’clock in the morning. Now that the social media giants have pulled their collective heads out of their asses and suspended the orange-haired doofus’ accounts, sanity can slowly return to America.

One of the things we used to do here, (back before Trump) was post photo-toons and other items which weren’t really political in nature. Now that some normalcy seems to be returning, at least on a temporary basis, we hope to return to those halcyon days when we could post funny items.

We’re big Bernie Sanders fans here at the Bucket and we loved the picture of Bernie at the inauguration that has become an Internet sensation. We’re kind of late to the party, but here’s our take on that meme as he aims to do battle with the new crazies of the alt-right like Marjorie Taylor Greene, a.k.a. MTG, a.k.a. MT Head. Yes, this new wing nut is strong with the Q but then Bernie is strong with the force and the space lasers.

The force is strong with Bernie Sanders as he prepares to do battle with new right wing nut jobs like Marjorie Taylor Greene, a.k.a. MTG, a.k.a. MT Head.
The force is strong with Bernie Sanders as he prepares to do battle with new right wing nut jobs like Marjorie Taylor Greene, a.k.a. MTG, a.k.a. MT Head.

Portrait Of Failure: The Trump Revolution

Inauguration Day has finally come and once again America has a President again instead of an orange-haired, megalomaniac, ranting, raving, man child CEO/Dictator. Donald Trump has flown off to his lair in Florida and competency has returned to the White House. Sane, intelligent, democracy loving Americans are breathing freely again as well as people in countries around the world, as Joe Biden prepares to , once again, clean up another fricking mess made by Republicans.

We don’t usually toot our own horn here at the Bucket, but we predicted what the coming conservative revolution led by Trump might look like back in our post of November 17, 2012. After the 2012 election, Donald Trump started whining about how Mitt Romney was robbed, thus laying the groundwork for Republican claims of election fraud in the future. Trump, who was a Tea Party/Teabagger darling at that time, also threatened to run for President which prompted our photo-toon (which we’ve reposted below) showing the complete ridiculousness of the prospect of a Trump presidency as he incites his Teabagger/future MAGA warriors onward to a glorious conservative revolution while he sits in his luxurious CEO chair stroking his hair and his massive . . . ego.

Unfortunately for the world, Trump unbelievably became President in 2016 and his presidency turned out to be every bit as catastrophic as people thought it would be, culminating in a despicable, treasonous assault on the Capitol on January 6th. In true Trump fashion (and like we predicted), he egged his sycophantic supporters on to commit treason while he took a cushy seat in the White House watching the mayhem. It should be noted that no pardons were issued for any of the people who stormed the Capitol at Trump’s request. But Steve Bannon, the man who ran a scam collecting money from the sheeple for the non-existent border wall, was pardoned. The MÆGAMoron, QAnon, evangelical, rubes finally found out the hard way that Trump was nothing but a con artist who conned them nine million ways to Sunday.

In photo-toon summary, this is how Trump’s ‘revolution’ turned out.

Here’s our photo-toon from November 17. 2012 – the Inception

Megalomaniac Donald Trump vows to do his part in the coming conservative revolution.
Megalomaniac Donald Trump vows to do his part in the coming conservative revolution.

Here’s our latest photo-toon – the Insurrection. It sucks to be a Trump supporter.

A couple of ardent, redneck Trump supporters find out the hard way that they were duped nine million ways to Sunday by megalomaniac man child Donald Trump.
A couple of ardent, redneck Trump supporters find out the hard way that they were duped nine million ways to Sunday by megalomaniac man child Donald Trump.

Trumper Tantrum

We’ve been really, really, really enjoying our time off from commentary on current events, but it’s probably time to get back in the swing of things. So . . . anything interesting happen since election day?

Oh, yeah. Trump’s attempted coup. Yikes!!! We just might take a permanent leave of absence. Just when you thought sanity has made a comeback, Trump and his band of detestable enablers in the House and Senate have created yet another constitutional crisis. Despite having absolutely zero evidence of voter fraud and despite numerous lawsuits being thrown out, the GOP crybabies continue to whine that the election was stolen and that the Republicans will never accept Joe Biden as President. How old are these people? Because they’re supposed to be adults but yet, like their leader, the orange-haired man child, they throw tantrums every time they don’t get their way.

But this is nothing new for Republicans. Just take a gander at our category GOP Crybabies. They’ve been whining and crying since . . . forever. If they don’t get their way, there will be hell to pay as evidence by the storming of the Capitol building today by unhinged Trump supporters, a.k.a. right-wing terrorists. We sure noticed the difference in treatment of protesters. When BLM or liberal protest groups protested over the past four years, you’d would have thought that war had broken out the way armed forces were formidably stationed themselves against protesters. Not so today. The Trump-loving troglodytes were practically escorted by ‘law enforcement’ into the building to wreak havoc. What a load of bullshit!!!

So, in short: FUCK YOU, YOU GODDAMN REPUBLICAN CRYBABIES!!!

Whiny, sucky GOP crybabies throw their hissy fits and temper tantrums, all in an effort to overthrow the results of a democratic election to make their crooked dear Leader, America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, President-for-life,
Whiny, sucky GOP crybabies throw their hissy fits and temper tantrums, all in an effort to overthrow the results of a democratic election to make their crooked dear Leader, America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, President-for-life,

It’s A Festivus Miracle

We’ve been enjoying our break from commentary about current events so much that we’ve decided to extend our vacation until after New Year’s Day 2021. We’ve also thoroughly enjoyed the spectacle of the Trump machine failing and sputtering monumentally at overturning the election. But like we’ve pointed out after the election, it’s incredibly disturbing that 126 GOP lawmakers and 19 state’s Attorneys General actually signed on to overthrow the election results to keep their authoritarian leader in power. Fortunately, the Supreme Court rejected it thus preserving democracy in America at least temporarily . . . until the next lame ass Republican effort. Was it a Festivus miracle? Er . . . no . . . but democracy is not well in this country. We’ll use a coronavirus analogy to illustrate the unfortunate and inconvenient truth: American democracy is still alive, but it’s on a ventilator.

With that dismal grievance filed, we’d still like to wish everyone a Happy Festivus! And to the Trump family and all the enablers, sycophants and zombie supporters of the orange-skinned petulant man child, we think you know where you can stick the Festivus pole.

Happy Festivus aluminum pole

Turkey Day Time Out

While America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump continues his post-election temper tantrum and President-elect Joe Biden constructs his cabinet with little help from the Trump administration, we’ve decided to take some time off to catch our breath and regain some sanity and perspective on what the future holds for our country.

Let’s face it, folks: 2020 has sucked. Yes, Joe Biden won the presidency, but coronavirus continues to run amok amongst the human population on planet Earth and the Trump cult is still out there spreading ignorance, hatred and misinformation that is as bad or worse than the virulent pathogen. Let’s all just take a little time off, reset our compasses and maybe take a trip to sci-news.com and appreciate all the wonderful, amazing, spectacular things our universe has to offer, all made understandable by scientific inquiry. We’ll be back real soon.

Gone Fishin' - Be Back Soon!
We’re taking a break America. We’ll be back real soon.

So Much Whining

It’s been two weeks since the 2020 presidential election and ten days since Joe Biden was declared the president-elect and still America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump is throwing a hissy fit like a three year old toddler, proclaiming all the while that he didn’t lose the election and that he will never concede. He has launched several unsuccessful attacks trying to overturn the results in states like Michigan , Georgia and Pennsylvania but to no avail. Trump lost the election, by a ‘landslide’ (in 2016 Trumpianese) and he refuses to deal with it and many Republicans, like Lindsey Graham, are supporting his efforts. What’s more, the Trump administration’s refusal to interact with the Biden transition team is further endangering our democratic institutions and emboldening his insane right wing followers like QAnon, the Proud Boys, and evangelical zealots who act more like demons than their hero, Jesus.

Maybe Trump should take a page out of his 2016 election victory and call on his pal Vlad Putin to interfere, which was confirmed by the Mueller report. But it’s probably too late for those kind of shenanigans. We just heard that Putin only likes Presidents who don’t lose. Tough luck, little Donny! We guess it’s back to your incessant whining and diaper pooping.

America's Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump receives a wake-up call from his former BFF Vlad Putin.
America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and rejected, petulant man child Donald Trump receives a wake-up call from his former BFF Vlad Putin.

A Man For Four Seasons

While America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and petulant man child Donald Trump whines, cries and swims in the river of denial, his administration and the propaganda flying monkeys at Fox continue to enable the emotional toddler’s fantasy that he actually won the election through non-existent fraud, despite Biden earning more than 5 million more votes and more than likely winning the electoral vote by the same total the orange-haired megalomaniac defeated Hillary Clinton in 2016, 306-232; or as Trump called it in 2016, “a landslide”.

But an event occurred this past week which perfectly encapsulates the incompetence of the Trump administration. Somehow, instead of booking a press conference at Four Seasons Hotel in Philadelphia, the lame brains booked a gig at Four Seasons Total Landscaping. So, instead of just admitting a mistake and rescheduling – in typical conservative fashion, the Trumpies doubled down on their mistake and held the conference at the landscaping store which is conveniently located in an industrial-commercial area between a crematorium and an adult book store/theater. You can’t write comedy better than this and in fact all the late night comics had a blast mocking the whole insipid affair. And wouldn’t you know, Trump sends head goombah Rudy ‘Captain Colludiani’ Giuliani to give the presser as the rotten cherry on top of the shit sundae. Wow! The ineptitude is breathtakingly stunning! And yet there are seventy million people in America who voted for this kind of stupidity for four more years. Double Wow!

In a move which perfectly demonstrates the incompetence of the Trump administration, chief goombah Rudy Giuliani holds a press conference at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, conveniently located between a crematorium and an adult bookstore/theater, which brought about much perturbation from the clientele of the whack shack.
In a move which perfectly demonstrates the incompetence of the Trump administration, chief goombah Rudy Giuliani holds a press conference at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, conveniently located between a crematorium and an adult bookstore/theater, which brought about much perturbation from the clientele of the whack shack.