The last photo-toon in our zany zealot retrospective features Osama Bin Laden from our October 28, 2007 issue. Yes, relive those glorious years of the Bush Administration when you proved how much you loved America by wearing a flag lapel pin at all times, even in the hot tub. Remember, in America: the bigger, the better.
Oh, It’s Bora Bora…
Continuing with our zany zealot retrospective…we finally switch to the biggest pain in the world’s rear, Osama Bin Laden. The mastermind of the 9/11 attacks and other terrorist attacks around the globe, and the leader of the terrorist group Al-Qaeda hid successfully in Pakistan, our supposed ally, for ten years until President Barack Obama ordered the attack that killed him last year. BTW, we think President Barack Obama has a right to tout the attack. If Dubya can don an enhanced flight suit, land on aircraft carrier and use 9/11 repeatedly for political purposes for his re-election in 2004, then we have no problem with Obama doing the same.
Here’s a photo-toon from our December 5, 2004 issue, when Osama Bin Laden was supposedly hiding in the Tora Bora region in eastern Afghanistan.
Cactus Corners Singles Adventure Club – May 2012
The Cactus Corners Singles Adventure Club is a singles club for adventure seeking individuals in the Cactus Corners, Arizona area. The BilgeBucket Gazette’s own Dex Rexter, is a member of this fun loving group and has agreed to post upcoming events in an effort to boost membership. Meetings occur every other Friday at the Pink Gecko Karaoke Lounge in the Cactus Blossoms Strip Mall. Here are the exciting events planned for the coming weeks.
- Thursday, May 17th – Origami Cactus Party at Maggie Bell’s house. Everybody will create their own origami cacti. Maggie will supply the paper, you supply the booze.
- Saturday, May 19th – I Hate Men Night at Mistress Spankarella’s dungeon. Women, get your aggressions out on all men as Mistress Spankarella straps some poor schlep on the Wheel of Pain for some big time retribution. A male volunteer is needed. Hello. Anyone?
- Monday, May 21st - Midnight rollerblading at Cactus Wash Drainage Ditch. Be sure to bring your flashlights, because it’s crazy dark down there. Word has it the concrete is a bit uneven, too. Helmets and pads are optional.
- Thursday, May 24th – Candyland Night at Dale Carlson’s house. Bring your own sweets to enjoy while navigating Gumdrop Pass and Lollipop Woods. The night’s overall winner wins a big, 12 inch, candy cane courtesy of Dale.
- Sunday, May 27th – Thin the Herd Hike planned at Rattler’s Canyon in the Buzzard Mountains southwest of Gila Bend. This remote, isolated area, miles from the nearest hospital, is noted for it’s abundance of poisonous critters like the Western Diamondback rattlesnake, the Gila Monster, the bark scorpion and numerous other exciting, deadly animals. Be sure to wear as little clothing as possible because it will be plenty hot out. Don’t worry about water, either. Our 75 year old map says there’s a small stream in the canyon.
- Wednesday, May 30th – Happy Hour at Café Muy Caro in Cactus Pavilions Strip Mall. Join us for lackluster conversation, somewhat edible food, and tremendously overpriced drinks. Be sure to bring your credit cards, because you’ll get reamed worse here than at the gas pump.
- Friday, June 1st -Casino Night at Cactus Valley Casino. This casino guarantees not only the loosest slots in town, but also the loosest sluts. Spend your paycheck at the blackjack tables; lose your mortgage payment at the craps table; or just get loaded from the free drinks served by the sexiest waitresses this side of Ahwatukee. Plus, relive the glorious music of 1980’s super group Wang Chung with the Wang Chung Experience in the Charlie Callas Room. Like the song sez: Everyone have fun tonight, everyone Wang Chung tonight!
- Sunday, June 3rd – Hike planned at Grommet’s Ravine near Wickenburg. This area used to be an industrial waste dump and has been semi-cleaned up. If we’re lucky, we’ll see a few wild dogs with two tails, five legged cats and three-eyed mice. Wear waterproof shoes since some of the left over toxic sludge tends to eat through shoe leather and skin.
Saddam’s Grim Visitor
Another Saddam photo-toon, this time from our November 13, 2006 issue. A certain Mr. Reaper pays a visit to the pillar of humanism to remind him of his grim prospects.
Saddam’s Lawyer?
Our zany zealot retrospective continues with more Saddam Hussein… This photo-toon is from our July 18th, 2004 issue and features Saddam’s surprise choice of lawyer for his criminal trial in Iraq. We think he may have watched too much American TV.

Saddam Hussein surprised the world when he introduced Ben Matlock to be his defense attorney for his upcoming trial.
Judge Judy Dispenses Justice
More Saddam Hussein…this photo-toon is from our December 21, 2003 issue, not long after Saddam was caught lounging in his spider-hole. Who should administer justice to this rogue dictator? In 2003, the answer was obvious.
The Real WMDs: Wieners of Mass Destruction
Enough Kim Jong Il…onto Saddam Hussein. Yes, the former Iraq dictator was a pain in the world’s ass for many years, but America made this monster back in the 80′s when he was heralded by the Reagan administration for fighting against the Ayatollah in Iran for eight years. And as with all tin horn dictators propped up by an enormous empire, they get too big for their britches and must be removed by the powers who enabled them in the first place (see every empire since the dawn of civilization).
Here’s a photo-toon from our August 14, 2003 issue, when Saddam Hussein was still on the loose after the “slam dunk” invasion of Iraq.
Daffy and Dethpicable
Kim Jong Il reportedly was a huge Daffy Duck fan. He owned the complete collection of episodes and also had a humongous collection of memorabilia. Who knows? Maybe he wanted to be Daffy Duck? Here’s a photo-toon of the dethpicable dictator from our October 28, 2006 issue.
Rewind: Zany Zealots
A couple posts ago, the recent failure of North Korea’s long range missile reminded us of Kim Jong Il’s wilted missile back in 2006. Which got us thinking about all the anti-American zealots in the past decade who have died or gotten themselves captured and killed. We’ve decided to do a brief photo-toon retrospective on these radical, rabble-rousing, pain-in-the-worlds-asses. Plus, we’ve also got nothing new to put up so we decided to recycle for a while.
Kim Jong Il was known for his rather odd hairdos and his enforcement of hair styles on the people of North Korea. Here’s a photo-toon from our February 13, 2005 issue which shows North Koreans and visitors alike falling in line with the decree that all must follow the Great Leader.

North Korean dictator, Kim Jong Il, enforces his new policy where every citizen must wear the same hairdo as the illustrious leader...no matter what.
Shows Tonight On Amish TV
There are tons of obscure television channels available on cable and satellite dishes. Well, here’s a listing for Amish TV. So settle thee in thy rocker chair with a glass of milk and a slice of shoofly pie and enjoy thyself.
Shows Tonight on Amish TV
| 7:00pm | Barnraising 911 |
| 7:30pm | Knit Thee a Quilt! |
| 8:00pm | Bonnet Fashions for Spring |
| 8:30pm | Pimp Thy Carriage! |
| 9:00pm | Seth Gildenstern’s Late Night Prayer and Comedy Hour |






