Tag Archive for invasion

TPing The World: 2022 Edition

We’ve been enjoying the wonderfully mild weather here in Arizona (hence, fewer posts), doing things outdoors to try and boost our morale a bit with all the insanity going on right now, not just in this country, but in the world. We thought we were getting better but then Russia’s dicktator (misspelling intended) Vladimir Putin had to go and invade Ukraine. We would have thought that Russia had enough land but apparently not. The rest of Europe learned its lessons well from World War II and the Cold War, but apparently Russia wants to relive those glory days of old. Fortunately, most of the world has condemned Putin’s brazen attack, even his allies in Czech Republic and Hungary. But the Ukrainians are fighting hard because they absolutely want democracy, not to be a puppet state of Putin.

Predictably, the only person who seems to be supporting Putin is his fan boy, TFG. The twice impeached, megalomaniac man child couldn’t stop praising his man crush about the invasion at CPAC. Up until the actual invasion, most right wing conservative Republicans were supporting Putin more than Biden, serving as useful idiots for Putin’s authoritarian propaganda. How’s that for being a patriotic American. They almost universally praise Putin as being stronger than Biden. Apparently, being an authoritarian asshole who bullies everyone else is the GOP’s definition of strong. Of course, the Republicans are blatantly pursuing a course of anti-democratic, authoritarian rule with their mostly unapologetic support of Trump and the January 6th attempted fascist coup. No wonder they’re in love with Putin. Maybe TFG could move to Russia and become a citizen like tough guy actor Steven Seagall.

We’re reposting a photo-toon from December 21, 2016 because T**** and Putin are still TPing the world; Putin in Europe and Asia and TFG with his insipid rallies and stupid speeches here in America. Sorry, folks — the planet is still royally screwed until we figure out a way to rid ourselves of these authoritarian, right wing, fascist assholes. Maybe we can interest T & P to take a ship to Mars with other greedy, corporatist jackasses Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk and Richard Branson. Then each of these manly men could all praise each other with their hot air until they run out of oxygen.

Support Ukraine!!! Support Democracy!!!

Bend over world, here come Trump and Putin.
With the new Trump-Putin new world order, the denizens of planet Earth look to be royally screwed.
Support Ukraine!!! Support Democracy!!!
Support Ukraine!!! Support Democracy!!!

Imperial Force


More retrospective articles from those dark days of debacle called the Bush administration… This article is from our April 11, 2004 issue. The Iraq War had begun to look like a quagmire, but Dubya was staunchly defended his new tenet of American imperialism, the Bush Doctrine. Now, if you look at United States history, American has had imperialistic tendencies ever since the Spanish American War and under both Republican and Democratic administrations. But the Bush Doctrine, which essentially states the U.S. can pre-emptively invade a country if it thinks that country poses a threat, opened up a humongous can of worms, and all possible kinds of unpleasant possibilities of abuse of power and violation of civil liberties. By the way, in case you didn’t know, WMD’s were never found.

Local Man Invokes Bush Doctrine To Invade Neighbors Garage

Jared Dillman, who lives in the Cactus Vista Subdivision, invaded the garage of his neighbor, Tony Kurzbach last Saturday, claiming that he had weapons of mass destruction. Dillman cited the precedence set down by the Bush doctrine, which states that it’s okay to pre-emptively invade a place if there is a concern weapons of mass destruction might be present.

Dillman defended his actions. “Kurzbach came home last Saturday carrying this big box. I didn’t know what was in that box. It could have been a grenade launcher. It could have been anthrax. It could have been a dirty bomb. I didn’t know. But I’ve had my suspicions about Kurzbach. I mean he looks all swarthy and he’s got that unibrow thing going. He could very easily be one of…them.”

Dillman continued. “So he leaves for the night, probably to meet with some terrorists. That was my chance. I picked his lock and rummaged around his garage. I scoured the place, but unfortunately I didn’t find any WMDs. I did find some Heavy Metal CDs, though. That’s audio terrorism! So I took them. Kurzbach sometimes plays his music a little loud on the weekend and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let the neighborhood be exposed to Yngwie Malmsteen.”

Kurzbach was livid at the invasion. “First of all, I’m part Italian, part Hungarian, so I’m sorry I’m a little dark and hairy. Second of all, I’m a third generation American who loves this country. I have no intention whatsoever of doing anybody any harm. That ‘box’ was a DVD player I was getting as a gift for my grandmother. That asshole busts into my garage and rips through everything. I think I’m missing my Rob Zombie CDs.”

The police say their hands are tied. “We’d really like to help,” said Officer Ted McGriff as he munched on a Krispy Kreme. “But we’re talking the Bush Doctrine. If it’s good enough for our president, who are we to argue. Besides, who really wants to listen to Whitesnake anymore? They’re so 80’s.”

Neighbors had mixed reactions. Gladys Stephans said, “I don’t think Jared was right, but then again Tony could have had a nuclear bomb. It all turned out for the best because he destroyed those damn CDs. I’ve heard just about enough of Motörhead. That’s definitely a weapon of mass destruction as far as I’m concerned.”

Mildred Dressler said, “I appreciate that I don’t have to put up with any more Ratt while I’m watching Dr. Phil, but Jared probably should apologize for trashing Tony’s garage.”

Dillman scoffed at the notion of apologizing for the intrusion and destruction. “Are you kidding me? We live in the Age of Dubya. I can be arrogant, belligerent, and do anything I want and not apologize for squat. You know. Come to think of it. I saw Mrs. Dressler carry some pretty suspicious grocery bags in from her car the other day. Time to do my patriotic duty!”