Democrat – Page 10 – BilgeBucket Gazette

Capitalism? More Like Cannibalism

It’s obvious that our nation is not a functioning representative democracy anymore. Thanks to the recent Supreme Court Citizens United and McCutcheon vs FEC decisions, we can safely say that the United States of America is a corporate oligarchy, where only the wealthiest corporations have a say in what happens to America. So contrary to what the Republican say, big government isn’t the problem; corporate America controlling the government is the problem. After all, Republicans and Democrats nowadays are just corporate lackeys; doing their corporate overlord’s bidding for campaign contributions. It is truly sad to see that America is as corrupt as a banana republic. The whole idea behind the Republican’s ‘government is the problem’ con is to fool the masses into thinking that relaxing government regulations and oversight on corporations is a great thing for freedom when in fact it is the worst thing that can happen. Let’s be honest and frank here; capitalism breeds greed, avarice and selfishness. These traits are counter to everything a supposedly ‘christian’ nation holds dear. Without regulations, humanity’s greed runs rampant and our economy and society truly becomes a rat race. It’s shocking that just living basically and simply today costs an arm and a leg. People everywhere in the past ten years have gone under. The middle class has all but disappeared. In order to survive, people have to raise rates, fees and prices to exorbitant levels just to break even. Just taking a beloved pet to the vet can bankrupt a person. It’s gotten to a point where you have to wonder whether it’s capitalism anymore or cannibalism. Is this really what we want for our society?

Modern capitalism has taken on a more cannibalistic approach. — Capitalism: devouring the humanity from humans since the Middle Ages.

Bibi’s Boner …Or Boner’s Bibi

The big news of the last week is that Israel Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu gave a speech to Congress. It’s not rare that foreign dignitaries address Congress. But what is rare is when leaders of the opposition party, in this case the Republicans, arrange for it without the President’s knowledge. Yes, Speaker of the House and Chief Oompa Loompa, John Boehner (pronounced bo-ner), secretly arranged for Netanyahu to come speak to Congress to push for opposition of President Obama’s upcoming nuclear agreement with Iran. In some circles, the covert negotiation of a foreign leader or government by an unauthorized citizen is known as treason. As Jon Stewart pointed out in his always hilarious analysis, if the Democrats had invited the President of France behind George W. Bush’s back in the lead up to the Iraq War, the Republicans would have been screaming bloody murder. Despite this treasonous act by Boehner and the other Republicans in Congress, President Obama calmly and effectively explained afterward why he thinks Netanyahu, who, like Republicans, has been beating the war drum consistently for a quarter of a century, is wrong. One can only describe this move by the Republicans as colossally dickish, but what else is new.

New United States President, Israeli Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu suggests a war with Iran as successful as the Iraq War as treasonist John Boehner approves. — The Republican’s newly anointed President, Israeli Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu, proclaims his intentions for war with Iran with giddy approval from Treasonist of the House and Chief Oompa Loompa, John Boehner.

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

Hey, how ’bout those elections, huh? Kind of makes you want to move to Canada. Hell, this whole month has been nothing but a stunning display of…how shall we say…stupidity. Former healthcare guru, Jonathon Gruber is being lambasted for his comments on the ACA a.k.a. Obamacare in saying that it passed because of ‘the stupidity of the American voter’. Well, everybody’s mad at him for saying that but the election results back him up on this statement. Congress has an 11 percent approval rating and yet the electorate decided to put 96 percent of these clowns back in office. And only 36 percent of registered voters decided to cast their ballots, the lowest voter turnout since WWII. And furthermore, Democrats, instead of touting the success of Obamacare and the many things he’s accomplished in office, act like they don’t know him. Unfriggingbelievable stupidity all the way around!!! They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. So I guess Americans are both stupid and insane…what a winning combination! Of course, that does explain why we won’t do anything about gun violence, but we have a conniption fit when an illegal immigrant child toddles across our border.

Despite 11 percent approval ratings, 96 percent of Congress was retained. — 2014 election highlights: A majority of the American electorate decided to let a minority of pinheads put 96 pecent of the dumbass corporate lackeys back in office so that they can keep on screwing America. YAY!!!

Mr. Helper

Former Arkansas Governor and perennial GOP presidential candidate, Mike Huckabee, recently made headlines by commenting that Democrats are trying to convince women they need ‘Uncle Sugar’ to control their libidos. Of course, Mr. Huckabee, being a bible thumping conservative christian, prefers old-fashioned, holier methods of birth control to help women such as abstinence, prayer and a good old chastity belt.

Mike proposes that women use abstinence, prayer and a good old chastity belt, controlled by their male spouse, to control their wanton libidos. — Mike Huckabee declares that it is wrong for government to control a women's libido but perfectly A-OK for the church to control it.

Spill? What Spill?

The water in Charleston, West Virginia has finally been declared safe for drinking after a chemical spill into the Elk River from Freedom Industries on January 9th. This happened when an aging containment tank leaked MCHM, which is an agent used in processing coal, into the Elk River above the water intake for the company which provides water service for the area. It appears that this facility hadn’t been inspected by federal or state officials since 1991. It was also just determined that another chemical called PPH was also leaked into the water. Of course, since the government is controlled by the oil, gas and coal industries, it’s not surprising that Washington is using the “there’s nothing to see here” approach to damage control (remember the BP Gulf of Mexico oil spill a few years back). John Boehner said no new regulations are needed and all the other corporate lackeys in Washington are keeping mum as well. But this shouldn’t be surprising since our elected officials, especially Republicans, have been trying to reduce regulations and oversight since the Reagan administration. Dubya even put industry officials in key positions in the EPA. That’s like putting the mouse in charge of the cheese. Next industry officials will be trying to spin that MCHM and PPH are good for you. It’s smells like licorice, how bad can it be, right?

The water in Charleston, West Virginia tastes a lot like Freedom these days thanks to the coal industry. — A coal industry representative performs damage control with the citizens of Charleston, West Virginia after a chemical spill from an aging Freedom Industries tank leaked into the local water supply.

GOP’s Pyrrhic Victory

On Wednesday, Congress finally made a deal to fund the government and increase the debt limit, which was clearly a victory for President Obama and the Democrats. Right? Not so fast, America. Shutdown architect and smuggest Senator alive, Ted Cruz, declared that the shutdown was a great victory…for the Republicans???!!! Ah yes! The delusion continues…

tedcruzwashingtondcdestruction — Teabagger patriot and smuggest Senator alive, Ted Cruz, basks in the glow of his recent accomplishments.

Diplomacy Is So Wimpy

President Obama and Secretary of State John Kerry are making the case for taking limited military action against Syria for allegedly using chemical weapons on it’s own people. We’re not sure more military action in the Middle East is wise at this time but what’s most disturbing is one of the reasons stated by our illustrious Democratic and Republican leaders: that we need to take action because we don’t want to look wimpy. Really? This is an important reason for taking military action in a hotbed of civil unrest? We don’t want to look wimpy???!!! Right, diplomacy is so wimpy. Gee, don’t forget we want to impress the cheerleaders and cool kids, too. We’ve come to expect this grade school reasoning from Republicans, but come on President Obama and John Kerry! Screw using our tax money on jobs, employment, infrastructure and education IN THIS COUNTRY!!! Let’s get into another Middle Eastern quagmire, because we don’t want to look wimpy. Geez, you can almost see the marionette strings on our leaders as they are being manipulated by the military industrial complex.

obamakerryrepublicansyria — President Obama explains the importance of looking tough to avoid the painful wedgies and swirlies which may follow from trying to use wimpy diplomacy.

The Whole System Is Out Of Order

Another one from the “You’ve Got to be Kidding” file. It appears that President Obama’s new idols are the members of the Bush Administration. Recently, it was reported that the Obama Administration’s Department of Justice wants to grant immunity to the Bush Administration for war crimes in Iraq even though the Republicans will no doubt continue to kick the President in the teeth on anything he may want to accomplish. Something is rotten in Washington and in the media (as if we didn’t know already). In the past year, we’ve seen Dubya re-emerge into the public spotlight as an ‘enlightened’ artist, polls that indicate that people are starting to view the Bush presidency favorably, and even that more Republicans in Louisiana are blaming Obama for the sad response to Hurricane Katrina (see previous post), even though it was three and half years before he took office. Not only that, whistleblower Bradley/Chelsea Manning is a criminal for exposing government lies and the Bush Administration is getting a free pass for lying to the public and getting us involved in the clusterf*ck known as the Iraq War. The next thing you know, the Obama Administration will want to go to war with another country in the Middle East because, based on intelligence, they may have weapons of mass destruction. Oh….right….Syria. Didn’t we do this crap already and it ended badly for us? Like a trillion dollars in the hole, bad. Oh well, chalk up another win for the military-industrial complex. War is just good business!

obamadojbushadministration — President Obama shows his unrequited love for the Bush Administration.

The Party of Inclusiveness

RNC Chairman, Reince Priebus, recently made an announcement that Republicans will ban MSNBC and CNN from the Republican primary debates in 2016 if they don’t drop plans to air projects about Hillary Clinton, who will more than likely run for President in 2016. Yep, once again, the crybabies of the GOP are demanding that everybody does what they want or else. They’re certainly doing what it takes, too, to advertise themselves as inclusive and tolerant of the various demographics which makes the United States such a melting pot. Let’s review some of their triumphs: they want to enforce voter ID in order to suppress the black vote; the only kind of immigration reform they support is building a wall across the Mexican-American border; they think the government should stay out of people’s lives unless you’re a woman, which in that case, allows the government to patrol every woman’s uterus; they’re against gay marriage or really any kind of equal rights for gays, lesbians or transgendered people (just stay in the closet folks); they don’t want healthcare for anybody unless you can afford to pay the astronomical expenses associated with today’s medicine; they want to push christianity down everybody’s throats as the only religion to be allowed in this country; they value the rights of the gun shooter over the rights of the gun victims; they portray any scientist who proclaims that climate change is real to be a fraud. Yes, by all means, let’s keep electing these irrepressible zanies to run our country.

gopexclusiveparty — RNC Chairman, Reince Priebus, lays down the new rules that journalists must obey when dealing with Republicans.

Congress Keeps Priorities

In keeping with the Congress sucking theme…

Recently, a bill that would have strengthened background checks for gun purchases failed to pass despite passing 55-45, this despite a majority voting for it and 90% of Americans wanting stronger background checks. Republican Senators who voted against the bill proudly stated their obstructionism. Mitch ‘The Turtle’ McConnell even mocked the legislation on his facebook page after the vote. Then of course there is the dishonorable Senator Jeff ‘Two-Face’ Flake (but what a great smile and wow, the hair!) from our not-so-great-lately state of Arizona. He told constituents that he supported background checks and then promptly voted against the bill. Then his teenage son recently got into hot water when he tweeted homophobic and racist tweets on Twitter. That’s would Jesus would do, right? So much for compassionate christian conservatism.

It’s nice to know that our elected officials are keeping their priorities straight, eh?