Tag Archive for immigration

We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Wall

Trump is closing in on the 100 day mark with very little to show for it. Other than his placement of Neil Gorsuch on the Supreme Court (which has more to do with Turtle Boy Mitch McConnell and his fellow Senate Republicans using the nuclear option), he’s done nothing more than bomb Syria and bomb Afghanistan and those were done mostly to distract people’s attention away from the investigation into his ties with Russia during the 2016 election and give boners to journalists like Brian Williams and Fareed Zakaria.

Well, there’s been a clamoring recently about what Trumpty Dumpty plans to do with his promised wall, which he promised would be a done deal by now. The truth is the wall isn’t needed, most people don’t want it and it would be a massive waste of taxpayers money, much like Trump’s repeated trips to his posh, opulent Florida resort, Mar-a-lago, so he can play golf. During the Obama administration, illegal immigration declined (1 million unauthorized immigrants returned to Mexico) and will continue to go down (illegal crossing down 40% in Trump’s first month) because the United States has the biggest, most dangerous doofus, outside of North Korea, in charge of the country. The only deterrent we need is plastering the Donald’s face on welcome billboards at the border with some of his delightful words of wisdom and nobody in their right mind would want to come into this country. Hell, we don’t even want to stay in this country with the orange rage monster at the helm. So we say, we don’t need no stinkin’ wall.

The United States has decided to implement a much more cost effective way of reducing illegal immigration and increasing emigration featuring Donald Trump welcoming people from Mexico with his words of wisdom.

Instead of building an unnecessary, expensive border wall, the United States has decided to implement a much more cost effective way of reducing illegal immigration and increasing emigration.

The Queen Of Alternative Facts

The Trump administration’s spin doctor, a.k.a resident bullshit artist, a.k.a. Queen of Alternative Facts, Kellyanne Conway, has made quite a splash since Donald Trump has started his reign as CEO/Dictator of America.

Last week, she created the Orwellian term ‘alternative facts’ to defend Press Secretary Sean Spicer’s outright lie about the immensity of the Inauguration crowd despite the visual evidence to the contrary.

This week, she referenced the Bowling Green Massacre to justify Donald Trump’s immigration ban. The only problem with this is that the Bowling Green Massacre never happened. It’s not a lie folks, it’s just another alternative fact from the Queen of Alternative Facts, Kellyanne Conway.

The Trump Administration's Queen of Alternative Facts, Kellyanne Conway, explains how Donald Trump ended the Bowling Green Massacre by killing Iraqis/Aliens with a laser cannon, thus saving America from certain death.

The Trump Administration’s Queen of Alternative Facts, Kellyanne Conway, spins another yarn inflating the legend of America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump.

Liberal Media My Ass!

Back in December we posted about how obnoxious the Republicans were being about President Obama’s immigration executive order. We also posted about their claims of Obama being an imperial president despite having the fewest number of executive orders of any two term president going back one hundred years. One thing we failed to mention is that none of the four major news networks decided to cover the President’s executive order. Let me repeat that; NONE. ZILCH. NADA. NULL. Hmm… we think that’s a fairly odd way for the ‘liberal media’ to behave. We would think a ‘liberal’ media would televise every moment of a supposedly ‘liberal’ president’s important executive order concerning immigration reform; touting it as the greatest event ever. But, not one of the four major news networks, ABC, NBC, CBS or FOX(big surprise), covered the event.

Now the Republican Noise and Fear Machine has its sights set on probable 2016 Democratic Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton. They’ve already been whining about the Benghazi non-scandal. Now they’re crying about Hillary Clinton using a personal server for government email correspondence as Secretary of State. We’re not trying to sugarcoat Clinton’s handling of her email; she blundered.  But it’s no worse than when good ol’ Dubya lost millions of emails in 2007, which the supposedly ‘liberal’ media conveniently glossed over. Or the fact Colin Powell and Karl Rove have used personal email for their own purposes. Or that former Florida governor Jeb Bush, the leading Republican candidate for President in 2016 and Dubya’s brother, had some email problems of his own, using personal email to discuss troop deployments and security issues.

Could it be that the ‘liberal’ media is just a great big con job by the biggest, most well funded, propaganda artists since Joseph Goebbels’ propaganda machine in Nazi Germany? Nah, come on! Just like their stupendously stupid letter to Iran, the Republicans are just joshing with us. Pretty funny, eh?

President Obama takes time to thank the 'liberal' media for their generous coverage of his important immigration executive order back in November 2014.

President Obama takes time to thank the ‘liberal’ media for their generous coverage of his important immigration executive order back in November 2014.

A Fine Red Whine With Your Immigration Reform

President Obama sure got the crybaby Republicans in a hissy fit with his executive order on immigration reform before the Thanksgiving holidays. You’d think he declared himself King of the World, but that’s exactly how many Republicans saw his action. They’ve been crying like the little crybabies they are ever since. Of course, they’ve been doing that ever since Obama became President. It’s really quite baffling considering that all Presidents going back to Eisenhower, have issued executive orders on immigration. Yes, even St. Ronald Reagan gave an executive order on immigration. But today’s GOP members conveniently forget those facts. They’d rather build their case that Obama’s a tyrant and needs to be impeached, despite Obama having the fewest number of executive orders of any two term President in the last one hundred years. It’s funny how one minute, Republicans say that Obama’s a pussy and needs to take off his mommy pants when dealing with Syria, Iran or Russia and then the next minute he’s a blood thirsty monarch forcing his will on the American people or  just giving away the country to any foreign nation. Yes, the Republican Fear and Noise Machine, powered by Fox News, is working just fine; spreading fear and misinformation to all Americans…a fine, red whine just in time for the holidays!

GOP crybaby Senators and Congressman call Obama an Emperor and threaten impeachment because he's doing his job.while Republicans sit around and say no.

GOP congressman are crying and whining over President Obama’s recent executive order on immigration, which was necessary because Republican led House completely failed to their job and pass legislation on an immigration reform this year.

Treat ‘Em Like Polly

As usual, the Republican Fear and Noise Machine is in overdrive since Obama has boldly come out fighting after the election. Obama has pushed for keeping net neutrality, voting against the Keystone pipeline (it didn’t pass the Senate this past week), and the big news in the past week, an executive order for comprehensive immigration reform. The GOP is fit to be tied. Of course it doesn’t matter that a GOP investigative committee found no wrongdoing by the Obama administration in Benghazi. Speaker of the House, John Boehner (pronounced boner), had announced that they’ll pursue another investigation with a committee that he will select. How is a sane person to deal with these Republican shenanigans? We think the pet care world has an appropriate answer for dealing with the fearmongering, conservative Republican in your life. Just use the following tactic at Thanksgiving dinner if your Republican gets going on a rant.

If the fearmongering conservative Republican in your life keeps acting up, just throw a sheet over him, like you do Polly.

The pet care world provides an answer for dealing with the fearmongering, conservative Republican in your life.

 

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

Hey, how ’bout those elections, huh? Kind of makes you want to move to Canada. Hell, this whole month has been nothing but a stunning display of…how shall we say…stupidity. Former healthcare guru, Jonathon Gruber is being lambasted for his comments on the ACA a.k.a. Obamacare in saying that it passed because of ‘the stupidity of the American voter’. Well, everybody’s mad at him for saying that but the election results back him up on this statement. Congress has an 11 percent approval rating and yet the electorate decided to put 96 percent of these clowns back in office. And only 36 percent of registered voters decided to cast their ballots, the lowest voter turnout since WWII. And furthermore, Democrats, instead of touting the success of Obamacare and the many things he’s accomplished in office, act like they don’t know him. Unfriggingbelievable stupidity all the way around!!! They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. So I guess Americans are both stupid and insane…what a winning combination! Of course, that does explain why we won’t do anything about gun violence, but we have a conniption fit when an illegal immigrant child toddles across our border.

Despite 11 percent approval ratings, 96 percent of Congress was retained.

2014 election highlights: A majority of the American electorate decided to let a minority of pinheads put 96 pecent of the dumbass corporate lackeys back in office so that they can keep on screwing America. YAY!!!

GOP Insanity Plea

Just when you thought the Republicans couldn’t get any more irrational… Speaker of the House and Chief Oompa Loompa, John Boehner (pronounced bo-ner), has decided to sue President Obama for doing his job. According to the increasingly mentally unbalanced Republicans who control the House of Representatives, they see President Obama’s perfectly by the book executive orders as overreach of his authority. This despite the fact that President Obama has far fewer executive orders than any of his predecessors. We like that President Obama has finally given up trying to be the Compromiser-in-Chief and that he has said that he is doing his job because Congress is not doing theirs. Booom! There it is!  But the House GOP may have taken the final step for placement into the loony bin when they demanded action from Obama on the influx of immigrants into the southwestern USA after suing him for taking too much action. Talk about wasting taxpayers money! So let’s get this straight: Obama is damned for taking action and he’s damned for not taking action. Yep! Get the straight jackets ready. Boehner and Co. are officially lip-diddling insane.

Chief Oompa Loompa, John Boehner, explains that President Obama is damned if he does and damned if he doesn't.

Speaker of the House and Chief Oompa Loompa, John Boehner, dressed in his stylish new straightjacket, explains why people need to vote the Republicans out of Congress this November.

Let The Children Suffer

Hold onto your hats everyone. Conservative christian Republicans are upset at President Obama! Shocking right? Unaccompanied immigrant children have been crossing the border in record numbers this year and who’s fault is it according to the right wing christians? Obama’s of course, even though the surge is related to law to curb child trafficking passed in 2008 and signed into law by….George W. Bush. What should we do with all these children? Conservative christians have been screaming loudly about the only obvious solution…send the little varmints back. What a great christian attitude! That’s certainly what Jesus would have done…or at least Capitalist Jesus would have done it. Just let holier than thou Bill O’Reilly explain it to you. The new updated Jesus message on little urchins now reads ‘Let the Children Suffer’.

Capitalist Jesus says that the immigrant children should go back to Mexico or rot.

Capitalist Jesus, who is also very Republican, updates his message on little urchins to now say 'Let the children suffer'.

SCOTUS Interruptus

The Supreme Court decided by a 5-3 decision Monday to disallow the majority of Arizona’s unenforceable SB1070 anti-immigration law, written by former Arizona state senator, Russell “I’m not a Nazi” Pearce, and signed into law by Governor Jan “Skeletor” Brewer back into 2010. But what we found disturbing was that the heart of the law, the stopping of ‘suspected’ illegal immigrants, was upheld. This was the most controversial part of the law because it doesn’t define what an illegal immigrant looks like. This doesn’t matter to the proponents of this law because in their mind an illegal immigrant is Hispanic. The enforcement of this law will open up the state to lawsuit after lawsuit with justifiable complaints of racial profiling. We can only guess as to what kind of suggestions the fertile mind of ‘patriot’ Russell Pearce will come up with for further enforcement of this law.

Former Arizona state senator Russell "I'm not a Nazi" Pearce suggests to Arizona Governor Jan "Skeletor" Brewer a possible way to enforce anti-immigration law SB1070, which he authored.