Adventures In Flag Coloring

Most of the news this weekend dealt with the death of one of our senators here in Arizona, John McCain. A casual search on our site will show that we were not fans of his politics at all. But, he does deserve to be remembered for his many years of service to this country and this state. Plus, his farewell letter to the nation is first class. Condolences to the McCain family. Rest in Peace, Senator McCain.

Which brings us to America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, who threw an absolute hissy fit about acknowledging McCain’s passing and even ordered the flags to be flown at full staff on Monday, which was soon after reversed. You know that he is fuming about McCain’s final request that Dubya and Obama give eulogies at his funeral and not the orange haired man child.

Speaking of children…Trump completely botched a photo-op this past weekend when he sat down with children to color the flag and started to color one of the stripes blue. Can you just picture Trumpty Dumpty  sitting in a little chair at a little table, his tongue sticking out of his mouth as he draws, peeking over at the other kids to see how they colored things in. In a rare journalistic coup for the Bucket, we obtained a copy of the flag that little Donald colored all by himself. Makes you proud to be an American, don’t it.

America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, recently showed off his artistic skill at a photo-op with children by coloring in the American flag the way he sees it.

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, recently showed off his artistic skill at a photo-op with children by coloring in the American flag the way he sees it.

Trumpland Motto: Truth Isn’t Truth

Things are getting mighty strange and confusing in the enormous conservative Republican bubble called Trumpland, a.k.a. the Republican party, these days. Paul Manafort has been found guilty on eight counts of financial crimes. Trump’s old lawyer, Michael Cohen pleaded guilty to campaign finance violations . And Trump’s current lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, keeps making a colossal ass out of himself. The most recent time occurred this past weekend when Giuliani told Meet the Press host, Chuck Prod…er…we mean Todd, that “Truth isn’t Truth”. We answer that statement in the voice of Dana Carvey’s the Church Lady, “Well, well, well. Isn’t that Orwellian!”

So what exactly is the truth to Giuliani or any cowardly, feckless Republican these days. Since the GOP has gone into full fascist mode, we’re guessing that the truth is anything America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump, a.k.a. Dear Leader, says it is.

America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump's lawyer, Rudy Giuliani states boldly and clearly that the truth isn't the truth or that the truth is what Donald Trump says it is.

To cowardly, feckless Republicans, the truth is what America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, a.k.a. Dear Leader, says it is.

Putin’s Puppet’s Puppet

Former Trump advisor, lackey and puppet, Omarosa Manigault Newman has captured the attention of the nation this past week with the release of her new book and tapes of the many lies told by the many liars who reside in the Trump administration. While we’re enjoying the barrage of leaks about this disastrous presidency, we’re also incredibly skeptical of Omarosa’s statements. Let’s be clear here – she’s a self-aggrandizing, obnoxious, mendacious, attention whore just like everyone else in the Trump White House including the orange haired man child. When she claims that Trump was eating paper like a spy out of espionage thriller… well… we have our doubts. Especially when she was such a colossal sycophant to Trump while she worked in the White House and praised him on the 2016 campaign trail.

Of course, now that Omarosa has switched teams, Trump, who once praised her, now vilifies her and has sicked his minions to attack her. Which brings us to Kellyanne Conway, Trump’s Queen of Alternative Facts, who recently emerged from her liars lair to spin lies and deception to protect Trump. Last week Conway denied that Trump was racist but yet had a hard time naming any staff members who were African-American. Omarosa’s leaked tapes seemed to have nullified this  particular claim. This week, Conway’s domestic troubles with her husband, who is strongly anti-Trump, have surfaced. Every time Conway opens her mouth, lies spew forth like a geyser of misinformation.

We’ve noticed that Trump’s puppet of alternative facts bears a striking resemblance to another puppet: from the 1970s, Wayland Flowers’ Madame.  Slap a turban on Conway’s head and load up the blue eye shadow and … Voila! We just wish Conway was as enjoyable as Madame was.

The Queen of Alternative Facts, Donald Trump's principal prevaricator puppet, Kellyanne Conway, bears a striking resemblance to Wayland Flower's beloved puppet from the 1970s, Madame.

The Queen of Alternative Facts, Donald Trump’s principal prevaricator puppet, Kellyanne Conway, bears a striking resemblance to Wayland Flower’s beloved puppet from the 1970s, Madame.

Wake Up America!

We’re still astonished that forty percent of Americans are still supporting America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, even after he’s admitted to collusion with Russia and practically knelt down and licked Vladimir Putin’s shoes during their summit in Helsinki. Of course, over the course of the last three years there have been many moments when Trump did or said something so incredibly insipid, stupid or ridiculous that any sane person would have thought surely people would abandon him. But not only are his base supporters applauding him, (Trump supporters are even wearing “I’d rather be a Russian than a Democrat” t-shirts) but the Republicans are doing nothing to reprimand him or reign him in thus indicating they are fine with Russia intervening in our elections, especially if it keeps Republicans in power.

Can you imagine the outrage if decent Republican presidents of the past like Eisenhower or Reagan had done what Trump has done? What if Eisenhower had said he didn’t trust the CIA and invited Krushchev to put missiles anywhere he wanted? What if Reagan (who called the Soviet Union the evil empire) fawned over Gorbachev, calling him ‘strong and powerful’? Can you imagine the outrage if Obama had asked Putin to help him win his elections? We’re living in a time where the supposedly ‘moral and righteous’ Republican party is anything but. The Republicans are nothing but feckless, mendacious hypocrites who revel at putting party above country, truth and justice. At least it seems with recent primary elections that some Americans are finally waking up to the GOP’s treachery.  Just this week, the Ohio congressional seat special election in district 12 is still too close to call and this district is about as red as you can get. We have one thing to say to Trump supporters or people on the fence about our orange haired, man child president: Wake Up!

Can you imagine the outrage if Eisenhower said he trusted the KGB more than the CIA or if Reagan fawned over a 'strong and powerful' Gorbachev or if Obama received help wining his elections from Putin.

Modern day Republicans conveniently look away from Trump’s outrageous actions that would have gotten previous presidents universal condemnation.

Putin’s Bitch

We’re still flabbergasted by Donald Trump’s performance at his summit with Vladimir Putin in Helsinki a few weeks ago. We’ve never seen such a shameful display by a United States president. Many others, including Republicans agree with us. Dubya came close when he got all romantic about looking into Putin’s eyes and seeing into his soul, ”I looked the man in the eye. I found him to be very straightforward and trustworthy. We had a very good dialogue. I was able to get a sense of his soul.”  But Trump’s actions boggle the mind.

To make matters worse, Trump insists on gaslighting Americans by stating that Russia is really sorry that Trump is President …er… CEO/Dictator and that they might influence the upcoming election… for Democrats.  But all indications are that because Trump and the Republicans are in power, Russia and Putin are relevant on the world stage again and they couldn’t be happier. Or like Trump said in Helsinki, “Putin is strong and powerful.”

And all pictures and videos seem to back this up.  There are very few pictures from the Helsinki summit where the normally glum Putin, isn’t smiling, like this pic from after Trump’s secret meeting with Putin. Oh yeah… Trump really looks like he’s laying down the law to Putin. Russia must really have something good on Trump… just sayin’.

America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, boldly lays down the law with Russian president, Vladimir Putin.

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, boldly lays down the law with Russian president, Vladimir Putin.

Full On Fascism

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has been busy this past week doing more outrageous, inane acts and his Republican cohorts in Congress keep shaking their heads, castigating him about the acts and then sitting on their ass doing nothing like the feckless cowards they are. This kind of complicit behavior is indicative that the GOP not only doesn’t have a problem with Trump, they approve strongly of his actions. Republicans have been wanting to establish permanent dominance over this nation for some time and now they’ve got their authoritarian bully in the White House to make it happen.

Trump and his sycophants at Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, have blabbered that a coup is coming by the Democrats using any means possible, like immigration protests. But as usual, Trump lies and deceives. No, the real coup arrived with the 2016 election when the Russians helped Trump and the radical, conservative christian Republicans win so they could stack the courts and jam their narrow minded agenda down not just this nation’s throat but the world’s throat. The Republicans are actively touting the truth as ‘fake news’ and vilifying the press or anyone for pointing out the GOP’s lies and deceptions. Take Trump’s recent Orwellian VFW speech where he told the attendees that “what you’re seeing is not what’s happening”. So, don’t trust your eyes and ears or your even your own thoughts. Believe only what Donald Trump tells you. Wow!!! A free press is vital to a functioning democratic society. But the Republicans are so hell bent on maintaining their power forever that they’re not even faking a tolerance for democracy. The GOP is going full on fascist!

We’ve commented before about Sinclair Lewis’s warning about fascism coming to America: “When fascism comes to America, it will wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.” Well, it’s here staring us right in the face. We’re basically a corporate oligarchy, a.k.a. the Holy Corporate Empire, where religion, money and big business converge and run our country with no dissent allowed. The only thing sane, educated, intelligent people are trying to do is prevent the United States from becoming an authoritarian, fascist dictatorship with an orange haired madman at the helm. We think that Republicans should review history to see what people did to fascist dictators in the past, i.e. Benito Mussolini during World War II. Our question to the GOP is this: do you really want to follow that disastrous path?

The modern day Republican party has apparently forgotten history and inexplicably wants to pursue the same disastrous path as Mussolini and his fascists did during World War II.

The modern day Republican party has apparently forgotten history and inexplicably wants to pursue the same disastrous path as Mussolini and his fascists did during World War II.

The Axis Of Vile

Once again, America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has managed to embarrass the United States on the world stage. This time, he’s pretty much admitted to treason against his country and completely submitted to Russia’s president/dictator, Vladimir Putin. In an ‘historic’ meeting with the Russian strongman, Trump called out his own country’s intelligence agencies, all of whom have come to the conclusion that Russia interfered in the 2016 elections, and yet sided with Putin. Can you imagine if conservative patron saint, St. Ronald Reagan had done something like that back in the ’80s with Mikhail Gorbachev? “The CIA says not to trust you Gorby, but I’ll give up all our nuclear weapons and you can keep yours.” Once again, electoral-vote.com provides an excellent analysis on what the hell happened in Helsinki.

Prior to the summit, or shall we say submit, Trump also called America’s European allies in the European Union ‘foes’. Last week at the NATO summit, he managed to practically withdraw the United States from the organization. Like a former Russian envoy said, “Putin has to do nothing to undermine the alliances and international institutions that helped to advance American security and prosperity for the last several decades. Trump is doing all the work for him.” WTF!!!

So what does this all mean? Are we now forming an ‘axis of vile’ against the rest of the world? Are we now in cahoots with authoritarian regimes like North Korea and Russia? Or is Trump just doing what he was supposed to do when Russia hacked the election in 2016; make Russia great again? We don’t know but we’re getting pretty sick of this shit. We think our elected officials should probably start getting off their lazy asses and aggressively pursuing removing this idiot from office before he gives Putin the keys to the White House. Either that or we guess we’d better all start learning Russian.

America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has joined a super cool new club called the Axis of Vile with his authoritarian strongmen pals Kim Jong Un of North Korea and Vlad Putin of Russia.

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, has joined a super cool, new club called the Axis of Vile with his authoritarian strongmen pals Kim Jong Un of North Korea and Vlad Putin of Russia.

Trump’s New Supreme Lackey

To no one’s surprise America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, picked a right wing conservative to be his new Supreme Court justice. Super catholic, Brett Kavanaugh, would give the Court a decidedly conservative and catholic lean for the next generation.

Of course, the media pundits and supposed experts are squawking and blathering about what all this means. There’s even news that departing justice, Anthony Kennedy even hand picked his successor. Most people are speculating that Roe v. Wade will likely be overturned, thus forcing women who may want to terminate a pregnancy for health reasons into back alley abortions or to use a coat hanger just like the good old days prior to the 1970s. We guess the life of the mother isn’t important at all to supposedly pro-lifers. Talk about your compassionate christian conservatism.

But we think it’s pretty clear that Trump chose Kavanaugh, because of his supposed enlightened stance on presidential privilege. Kavanaugh was member of Ken Starr’s team that sought impeachment against Bill Clinton and said at that time that no president was above the law. But apparently the young religious zealot had an epiphany while working in the Bush White House and believes that the president is above the law, especially if he’s Republican, which comes in handy with the ongoing Russia probe. So if and when Trump is found guilty of collusion with Russia and treason, he’ll really be innocent because…you know…conservative Republicans are never wrong and should never be punished (see Watergate, Iran-Contra affair, Iraq War, etc…).

Supreme Court justice nominee, Brett Kavanaugh, proudly proclaims that America's CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, is above the law and cannot possibly be guilty of crimes he may have committed like collusion or treason.

America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, guarantees he won’t have to go to jail by choosing right wing authoritarian and religious zealot, Brett Kavanaugh, as the new Supreme Court justice.

Space Cadet Trump Of The Space Force

One of the more curious things Trump has done lately is to promote a future branch of military in outer space called the Space Force. We say curious because Trump doesn’t give a rat’s ass about science or space. The only reason he’s doing this is obvious: more distractions so that the Republican wrecking machine can keep on destroying our government. The GOP currently has their sites set on Social Security and Medicare cuts.

We’ve commented before about about space exploration. Sure, maintaining satellite safety and cleaning the ever growing field of space debris is important.  Space.com has an excellent article about whether or not a Space Force and the militarization of space is a good idea or not. We believe the exploration of space is perfect for robots, drones and other mechanical and electronic machines. But we also think that humans are not equipped to live in space and these proposals for any country to build space stations in orbit around the moon, or colonies on the moon or Mars are a colossal waste of money and a disaster waiting to happen for any nation which chooses to pursue this endeavor. Like we’ve said before in the link referenced above, the best spaceship possible is planet Earth.

We also think that in Trump’s obtuse, non-scientific mind, the idea of a Space Force is more like Star Wars, Star Trek, The Jetsons and a dash of The Simpsons all mashed together. So, we’re looking forward to more incredible space adventures from America’s ace Space Cadet, Donald Trump of the Space Force.

American CEO/Dictator and ace Space Cadet of the Space Force, Donald Trump, boldly proves that scientists are wrong and the vacuum of space is just fake news and is really full of space air.

American CEO/Dictator and ace Space Cadet, Donald Trump, promises his sheep-like followers plenty o’ space adventures in the future if they join the Space Force.

Melania: We Don’t Care About You Anymore

Believe it or not, we’ve got standards here at the Bucket. We usually don’t poke fun at the family of a politician unless they themselves are politicians. We did have fun with the Bush twins(they were adults) and Laura Bush during Dubya’s regime and likewise with Michelle Obama. But Sasha and Malia were off limits as is Barron Trump. We did do one photo-toon with Trump’s children Eric, Donald Jr. and Ivanka, but again, they are adults. We also aren’t going to waste our time mocking them because…quite frankly…they aren’t worth it.

We’ve refrained from poking fun at First Lady Melania Trump because she seems to be truly miserable in her current position. Of all the Trumps, she seemed to be the one person who maybe, just maybe had a heart. We thought that until last week proved otherwise…hugely.

As she took off to visit the immigration camps last week, she chose to wear a jacket which had emblazoned on its back “I don’t really care, do u?” Now, Ms. Trump is really rich. She’s got tons of jackets from which to choose. This should’ve been a no-brainer. But apparently she’s as cold and ruthless as her husband. She could have chosen a less offensive item of clothing. But no. She chose to be a troll. Do you think Eleanor Roosevelt would’ve warn a jacket like that? Do you think the recently deceased Barbara Bush would’ve worn a jacket like that? No – of course not. They were human beings. Well, we’ve decided to take Melania off our personal do-not-disturb list and reward her for her truly ugly display of intolerance. We think, because of her action, she resembles a horse’s ass. But honestly, the horse’s ass wears that jacket much better.

Dear Melania Trump: We don't care about you anymore. P.S. The horse's ass wears the jacket much better than you.

Dear Melania Trump: We don’t care about you anymore. P.S. The horse’s ass wears the jacket much better than you.