Dubya – Page 7 – BilgeBucket Gazette

Oh The Irony

Well guess who’s been speaking up now that Russia has invaded Crimea in the Ukraine? Why it’s a couple of our old buddies from the Bush administration, Dick Cheney and Condoleezza Rice. Dick Cheney, says that we should not take this invasion of a sovereign nation lightly and that no country should be allowed to do that to another country. And Condoleezza Rice echoes those sentiments. Haven’t they done enough for the world already? Of course, as we all learned from those eight fantabulicious years of Dubya and his pals, conservative Republicans are somewhat irony impaired. But hey… Dick Cheney just realizes that war is good business. So if there is the possibility of stoking another cold war and making money off of weaponry or oil, by golly, Dick’s going to be there on the front line ready for the profit taking (see Iraq War). What a Dick!

Dick Cheney and Condoleezza Rice see no irony in stating that no country like Russia has the right to invade another sovereign country like the Ukraine. — Former members of the Bush Administration and architects of the fiasco called the Iraq War, Dick Cheney and Condoleezza Rice proudly display their irony impairment for all the world to admire.

Top Holiday Gifts For 2013

The holiday season is in full swing. If you haven’t spent yourself into bankruptcy yet and are still looking for the right gift for that special someone in your life, look no further. Our intrepid staff has conveniently compiled a list of the hot “gotta have it” items for this years holiday season. Take this to the mall and don’t forget your helmet, spiked gloves and shoulder pads. Holiday shopping is dangerous!

An Official Miley Cyrus Foam Finger
A painting by George W. Bush of George W. Bush in the bathtub
‘Moby Dick’ by Rand Paul
The NSA Super Snooper Spy Kit – For Kids
Ted Cruz’s new fragrance: Arrogant Ass
A lump of coal autographed by Dick Cheney
‘The Great Gatsby’ by Rand Paul
Sarah Palin’s Book ‘Good Tidings and Great Joy’ Yule Log
‘Kwanzaa For Dummies’ by Paula Deen
A Carlos Danger Action Figure with Realistic Twerkin’ Motion
Walter White’s Meth Starter Kit – For Kids
‘Atlas Shrugged’ by Rand Paul
A ‘Jesus was a Liberal’ T-Shirt (blatant capitalistic plug)
Guns, guns and more guns
Healthcare

Rewind: Condi’s Hot Tub

Have you ever noticed that you rarely see a conservative, christian Republican male not dressed in a suit and tie. Sure there have been exceptions: St. Ronald Reagan photo-oping himself as the Marlboro Man out on his California ranch; Dubya photo-oping himself riding around in his pick up truck, wearing a t-shirt, jeans and cowboy hat ‘clearing brush’ (because that’s what all manly men like to do on their vacations); and of course Spiff Romney photo-oping, wearing his blue denim button down shirt with the top button opened up just enough so we can see the top of his t-shirt (or it might have been his magic, Mormon undergarment). It’s no secret that many religious conservatives (not only christians) are repressed about sex and about their bodies. Some can’t even say the words penis or vagina without turning fifteen shades of crimson. Some even cover themselves up at all times…even in the hot tub???

Here’s a photo-toon from our April 11, 2004 issue just after Condoleezza Rice bamboozled the 9/11 commission, showing what kind of wanton antics happen when conservatives get their phreak on. Just don’t get your ties too wet guys.

republicanhottub — Condoleezza Rice celebrates her bamboozling of the 9/11 commission by relaxing in the hot tub, conservative style, with other members of the Bush Administration. From left: Rice, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld, Paul Wolfowitz. Front: President Bush.

The Whole System Is Out Of Order

Another one from the “You’ve Got to be Kidding” file. It appears that President Obama’s new idols are the members of the Bush Administration. Recently, it was reported that the Obama Administration’s Department of Justice wants to grant immunity to the Bush Administration for war crimes in Iraq even though the Republicans will no doubt continue to kick the President in the teeth on anything he may want to accomplish. Something is rotten in Washington and in the media (as if we didn’t know already). In the past year, we’ve seen Dubya re-emerge into the public spotlight as an ‘enlightened’ artist, polls that indicate that people are starting to view the Bush presidency favorably, and even that more Republicans in Louisiana are blaming Obama for the sad response to Hurricane Katrina (see previous post), even though it was three and half years before he took office. Not only that, whistleblower Bradley/Chelsea Manning is a criminal for exposing government lies and the Bush Administration is getting a free pass for lying to the public and getting us involved in the clusterf*ck known as the Iraq War. The next thing you know, the Obama Administration will want to go to war with another country in the Middle East because, based on intelligence, they may have weapons of mass destruction. Oh….right….Syria. Didn’t we do this crap already and it ended badly for us? Like a trillion dollars in the hole, bad. Oh well, chalk up another win for the military-industrial complex. War is just good business!

obamadojbushadministration — President Obama shows his unrequited love for the Bush Administration.

Some Elephants Do Forget

From the “You’ve Got to be Kidding” file…According to a recent poll, apparently almost 30% of Louisiana Republicans think that Obama was responsible for the horrendous response by FEMA to Hurricane Katrina in 2005 despite being almost 3 and 1/2 years before Obama even came into office. And almost 45% aren’t sure whose fault it is. Only 28% thought Bush was responsible for the lousy response. It appears that certain members of the GOP species (elephantus redneckius) have a truly serious memory problem. Unfortunately, it also appears that Obama has officially replaced Bill Clinton as the new Republican scapegoat for all the woes in the world.

redneckmemorylapse — A couple of Louisiana Republicans kick back and have an intellectual discussion about American history as they see it.

Big Brother Is In Your House…Literally

We’ve been on vacation kicking around in Europe. What did we miss? Uh-oh!

We knew Democrats were spineless and Republicans were shameless, but this is ridiculous. Apparently all our democratically elected representatives now think it’s a great idea to spy on each other. Right now, every resident of the former East Germany is laughing their ass off at us and rightfully so. We’ve become that country. What’s next, informal informants for our new Stasi-like surveillance state. Seriously folks, read up on the former country called East Germany and see if we’re now starting to resemble it(except of course we’re a corporatist surveillance state and not a socialist surveillance state). We had so much hope for President Obama and, like Clinton and all Democrats before him, is bending over backwards again to the right to appease the paranoid, right-wing crybabies that populate today’s Republican party (remember, the GOP is the party that started all this crap with the Patriot Act during Dubya’s administration). We’ve started looking for a new country to live in. We’re thinking the former East Germany is looking nice. At least they know enough that legalized spying is a bad idea.

President Obama has had a sudden change of heart concerning the surveillance policies of the Bush administration.

The Party of New Ideas

Former Republican Governor of Florida and brother of the bestest President ever, George W. Bush, laid the ground work this past week for a possible run at the White House in 2016 when he said on Fox News, a.k.a. The Republican Propaganda Network, that he believes that there isn’t any Bush baggage at all. Wow! We want to know what color the sky is in Jeb Bush’s wonderful wacky world.

jebbushdubya — Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush comes up with a fresh proposition for America, because the Republicans are the party of new ideas.

And The Whining Begins

You knew that the Republicans wouldn’t take the election results well but this last week has been ridiculous. From Donald Trump’s asinine tweets for ‘Revolution’, to Karl Rove’s refusal to believe that Obama won Ohio and the election, to the petitions being signed by red staters who want to secede from the United States. We hear that Texas has already collected over 80,000 signatures. We here at the Bucket say good riddance to the Lone Star state. They can go create their own country and elect Dubya as their eternal emperor for all we care. Oh yeah! That will be a great country!

GOPcrybabies2012 — Compassionate, conservative, Republican leaders respond to the re-election of President Obama like the true, whiny, sucky, crybabies they are.

Romney’s Biggest Endorsement

There’s only a few more days in Con-a-thon 2012 and according to the mainstream media polls, it’s neck and neck between incumbent President Barack Obama and the GOP challenger, Spiff Romney. Lost in all the drama has been perhaps Romney’s biggest endorsement: former President George W. Bush. Yes folks, ol’ Dubya approves of Spiff Romney because Romney’s economic plan is basically Dubya’s and we all remember what a triumph Bushonomics was for this nation.

romneybush — GOP candidate, Spiff Romney, picks up a key endorsement from the bestest president ever.

Channeling Bad Presidents

We’re baaaack! We’ve been away for awhile. What did we miss?

Oh yeah. A hidden video which presents the true side of Spiff Romney (more on that in upcoming posts) and a lackluster debate featuring a lying used car salesman(Romney), who was channeling deceptive, former actor/president St. Ronald Reagan, and President Obama, who by using that tried and untrue Democratic strategy of taking the high road, ended up having that deer-in-the-headlight look that Dubya sported throughout the 2004 debates with John Kerry. But what was worse was watching the media cream their shorts about how great Romney’s style was (liberal media? we think not), even though he lied his ass off again. We’re hoping President Obama is just using a rope-a-dope strategy to lure Romney into a false sense of security. In the coming month, he needs to slam Romney on his dubious record with Bain, his refusal to release his tax returns and his ‘47%’ video EVERY chance he gets. If there is one thing we’ve learned in the past fifty years, you can’t trust the Republicans to play fairly at anything.

Here’s a photo-toon from our October 10, 2004 issue which depicts ol’ Dubya in all his presidential debate glory.