Well the South Carolina primaries were this past weekend and there was another expulsion from the Republican clown car in the farce that is Con-a-thon 2016. Despite getting help from his brother Dubya, George W. Bush, (or maybe because of it), Jeb Bush bowed out of the presidential race. His campaign was hemorrhaging money and he needed a spectacular finish to stay in the race. Unfortunately for Jeb and the Bush clan, he didn’t get it.
Thus, that means that the so called ‘establishment Republicans’ will have to get behind Marco Rubio, a.k.a. Marcobot 2016, or Ohio governor, John Kasich, who somehow is still in the race. What’s so funny here is the con that Donald Trump is not an ‘establishment Republican’. He represents everything the Republican stands for: greed, business and industry above all others, authoritarianism, christianity only, white Americans only. He is the epitome of the Holy Corporate Empire or the Corporate States of America that the Republican party would like the United State to become for all eternity. At the beginning of this stupid campaign season, we thought for sure Jeb Bush or another mainstreamer like Scott Walker would prevail and that Donald Trump was nothing more than a red herring; someone so insipid that he made the rest of the candidates look responsible by comparison. Apparently the Teabagger wing has taken over the Republican party totally and completely. The GOP is officially and blatantly bat shit insane.
It appears that Jeb Bush will have time now to help his brother George W. Bush paint pictures in the bathtub.
The big news this past weekend was that Supreme Court justice, Antonin Scalia, died while on vacation in West Texas. We know it’s bad taste to speak ill of the dead, but Scalia was one of the worst justices ever. The Citizens United vs the FEC and the McCutcheon vs the FEC decisions, which pretty much legitimized the United States as a corporate oligarchy, were two of the worst in the past 100 years and it was because of Scalia and his four conservative activist cohorts on the bench. The news of Scalia’s death was barely even announced over the wires and the Republican crybabies were already whining, crying and politicizing the event. Even the clowns at the Republican Con-a-thon 2016 debate made an issue about it Saturday night.
And why were they crying? Because that’s what modern conservative Republicans do? Well…yes… but also because thanks to a little thing called the Constitution, President Obama gets to select the next Supreme Court Justice, who will most likely lean to the left, thus disrupting the conservative’s hold on the Supreme Court ever since good ol’ Dubya appointed Roberts and Alito to the bench during his term as President. This has upset conservative Republicans so much, that some are suggesting foul play in Scalia’s death, even though the cause was listed as a heart attack from natural causes.
There’s also the U.S. Constitution which states quite clearly in Article 2, Section 2, Clause 2:
“He[the President] shall have Power, by and with the Advice and Consent of the Senate, to make Treaties, provided two thirds of the Senators present concur; and he shall nominate, and by and with the Advice and Consent of the Senate, shall appoint Ambassadors, other public Ministers and Consuls, Judges of the supreme Court, and all other Officers of the United States, whose Appointments are not herein otherwise provided for, and which shall be established by Law: but the Congress may by Law vest the Appointment of such inferior Officers, as they think proper, in the President alone, in the Courts of Law, or in the Heads of Departments.”
Since Barack Obama’s second term as President doesn’t end until January 20th 2017, that means he’s still President and he “shall appoint Judges of the Supreme Court”. NOW!!!! Even former justice Sandra Day O’Connor has spoken up and said that the Senate needs to put on their big boy pants and do this. It’s interesting that Republicans like Ted Cruz and Mitch McConnell, who claim to worship the Constitution, conveniently ignore it when it appears they’ll not get what they want…like the goddamn little crybabies they are.
Whiny, sucky GOP crybabies are throwing a temper tantrum because President Obama wants to do his job and appoint a new Supreme Court justice.
The New Hampshire primaries were this past week and Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump were the big winners on the Democratic and Republican sides respectively. Of course, it also meant that the Republican clown car just got roomier in the continuing sham that is Con-a-thon 2016.
Carly ‘Ice Queen’ Fiorina, New Jersey boss Chris Christie and some guy named Jim Gilmore decided to suspend their presidential campaigns this week. It was expected that Fiorina would go soon since she wasn’t even invited to participate in the last Republican debate. Her numbers have dropped since her support of a fraudulent video against Planned Parenthood last year. Chris Christie didn’t receive an expected bounce from his thrashing of Marco Rubio in last week’s debate, so he went back to Jersey. And as far as Jim Gilmore goes, he never really had a chance. He wasn’t even in our original photo-toon of the the Republican clown car (see above link). He’s continually polled at 0% so he finally smelled the coffee and said goodbye.
Well, the Iowa Caucus BS is mercifully over and as predicted, the Republican Clown Car has gotten a lot roomier in the joke that is Con-a-thon 2016.
On the Democratic side, Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton finished in a virtual tie and nice guy, Martin O’Malley, wisely decided to end his campaign and devote his time to playing more guitar and doing ab crunches. We’re wondering if Sanders’ strong performance might mean that the ‘liberal’ media might actually start covering his campaign.
On the GOP side, the smuggest Senator alive, Ted Cruz, pulled a surprise and upset frontrunner Donald Trump, mostly by huckstering the evangelical christian vote. The funny thing about the Republican results is that despite not winning, Donald Trump and third place finisher, Marco Rubio, proudly declared that they were winners, too. Of course, all the egotistical Republicans think they’re winners, even Rand Paul, Mike *uckabee, and Rick Santorum, who all suspended their campaigns due to a complete lack of interest from voters. Then there’s Jeb Bush who finished a distant sixth. But then again, Jeb Bush said several weeks ago, they he prefers being in the back of the pack. Yep, there’s nothing like leading from behind. If he’s not careful he’ll be conducting his campaign from his couch.
It’s interesting to note that *uckabee won Iowa in 2008 and Santorum won in 2012 and of course they went on to…lose badly. Hmmm…we’re hoping that this trend continues in 2016 and Cruz plummets before too long.
Despite losing the Iowa Caucuses, GOP candidates and extraordinary con artists, Donald Trump, Marco Rubio, Mike Huckabee and Jeb Bush all proudly proclaim they’re winners.
Speaking of people supporting Trump, he’s got quite an eclectic list of celebrity endorsements heading into Iowa. Rolling Stone has another list. If you look at the lists, there are a lot of authoritarian, tough guy, manly men like Arizona’s own Joe ‘Just Call Me God’ Arpaio, Hulk Hogan, Mike Tyson and Russian President Vladimir Putin who said of Trump “he’s a bright and talented person”. We guess it takes a tyrant to know a tyrant. We’re sure that Putin and Trump could team up and subjugate the hell out of the rest of the world just like Stalin and Hitler did. Of course, all of these aggressive egotists would rather fight and kill than use something peaceful like diplomacy.
On the female side, there’s Ms. Ubetcha, Sarah Palin, who gave the strangest endorsement speech of all time (we like Stephen Colbert’s mockery of it). Conservative harpie and living skeleton Ann Coulter, anti-feminist Phyllis Schlafly and empty headed reality star Tila Tequila all are Trumpeters on Trump’s solid gold bandwagon.
But probably the strangest endorsement was by John Wayne. Although the Duke has been dead since 1979 , his daughter Aissa said that if John Wayne were alive today, he would endorse the Donald. You see Donald Trump’s 19th century mindset sits perfectly with the cowboy image embodied by the Duke. So to make America great again, we just have to make everything like it was back in the days of the Wild West (everybody’s got a gun; shoot first, ask questions later; tough, tough, tough; kill, kill, kill, etc…). We think Donald Trump’s motto should be, “We’re Going Back To The Future”.
Megalomaniac GOP candidate Donald Trump modestly acknowledges his ‘greatness’ to his adoring fans like Vladimir Putin, Sarah Palin, Ann Coulter and the ghost of John Wayne.
Here’s a photo-toon from our September 17, 2006 issue which shows what ol’ iron fisted Rummy would do with the appeasers.
Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld tells the pliant crowd at the American Legion convention in Salt Lake City, Utah, that critics of the Iraq War are morally and intellectually confused and that they are in fact appeasing the Islamo-fascists much the way Europe appeased Hitler in the 1930s, while conveniently ignoring the fact (or not) that he and the Bush Administration are employing Nazi propaganda tactics to suppress dissent in this country.
Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the peacemakers for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country. – Herman Goering
Poor Al Bundy! The much maligned patriarch of the dysfunctional Bundy family from the classic sitcom Married…with Children, can’t even retain his fame as the stupidest Bundy in America thanks to Y’all Queda leader, Ammon Bundy. Come to think of it, Ammon’s Dad, Cliven dethroned Al last year. Oh well. At least Al’s still the funniest Bundy.
Al Bundy, famous shoe salesman and athlete, who once scored four touchdowns in one high school football game, discovers that he’s no longer the stupidest Bundy in America thanks to Y’all Queda leader Ammon Bundy.
A member of the Y’all Queda armed domestic terrorist group that has taken over Malheur Wildlife Refuge in Oregon, explains his viewpoint to a resident of the Refuge, who is not amused.
