Tag Archive for primary

Iowa Caucus: There’s Not An App For That

The election primary season is kicking off and the Democratic needed a solid beginning to send a strong message to America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator Donald Trump that his days as ‘dear Leader’ of this country are numbered. But instead of serving up a caucus the Iowa Democrats served up a caucusf*ck. Apparently, an app the administrators had a “reporting issue” and wasn’t functioning properly and brought the integrity of the results into question. It’s the weekend but the precise results are still in doubt with Pete Buttigieg and Bernie Sanders both claiming victories. Talk about serving up red meat to Trump. You just know that the orange haired megalomaniac and his flying monkey sycophants at Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, will continually point to the incompetence displayed during the caucus as proof that Democrats will do anything to ‘rig an election’ and cannot be trusted. And all this after a superb performance by House Democrats, led by Adam Schiff and Jerry Nadler, in proving the guilt of Trump in his impeachment trial.

At least the Iowa fiasco is pushing forth a movement that just might get rid of the troublesome caucus forever and install a primary system in its stead just like almost every other state. There are several annoying anomalies on the Democratic primary side (superdelegates, anyone), and if the Dems finally decide to move into the 21st century and kill off the caucus and superdelegates, then that would probably increase their chances in future elections. Plus, there’s no way Iowa should be the first voting event of the presidential elections season since its demographics are so homogeneous. Here’s hoping at least that the Democrats learn something from this debacle.

America's CEO/Dictator and geography genius Donald Trump offers the administrators of the Iowa caucus app that clusterf*cked spectacularly a special reward for helping him in his re-election effort; annexation to Kansas City.
America’s CEO/Dictator and geography genius Donald Trump offers the administrators of the Iowa caucus app that clusterf*cked spectacularly a special reward for helping him in his re-election effort; annexation to Kansas City.

We’re Not Living On Tulsi Time

With all the drama of the impeachment unfolding on a day to day basis, the Democratic presidential primaries have been pushed to the back burner.
Bernie Sanders, Joe Biden and Elizabeth Warren continue to be the front runners, with Mayor Pete Buttigieg, Michael Bloomberg, Andrew Yang and Amy Klobuchar still hanging on with the Iowa caucuses just a week away.

One name that is amazingly still in the race despite anemic poll numbers is the curious case of Tulsi Gabbard. It has been suggested by Hillary Clinton that she’s a Russian agent, which has caused Gabbard to sue Clinton for defamation. Former candidate Kamala Harris scolded her for her criticism of Obama and her fellow Democrats. Is she a Russian plant? We don’t know, but her vote of ‘Present’ during the historic impeachment vote certainly didn’t quash the rumors and she announced she won’t seek re-election for her congressional seat in heavily Democratic Hawaii. As a matter of fact, Ms. Gabbard is now the most disliked Democrat. Why would any sane, rational person who has been conscious the past three years vote against impeachment, especially when the evidence is so overwhelming that the President abused his power and obstructed Congress (not to mention obstructed justice as the Mueller report volume 2 concluded)? Trump certainly approved of her vote.

So, what’s Tulsi’s game then? Is she a contrarian who just likes to criticize others in her party to bring attention to herself? She does support Bernie Sanders, who is a social democrat. She has strongly advocated most of the progressive Democrat’s issues in the past. But then again lately, she does seem to talk a lot like a Republican. She has also been sympathetic to Syrian dictator Bashar Assad. Ms. Gabbard appeared regularly on Fox News during the Obama administration and cozied up to Trump and Steve Bannon.


So, really . . . what is Ms. Gabbard’s deal? What’s her motivation? What the hell is she up to? We here at the Bucket think it’s something more egotistical. We think that the enigma that is Ms. Gabbard sees that the stairwell to the Democratic nomination is blocked and will be for many years to come with every Democrat currently still running polling well ahead of her. Like Reagan and Trump, (both former Democrats), the possibility exists that she could get the Republican nomination if she switches parties. Her vote against Trump’s impeachment certainly endeared her to Trump’s nutbag supporters and her approval is very strong from conservative males (gee, go figure that! . . . see the saga of Sarah Palin). Plus, she’s from a heavily Democratic state. Look at all the fawning Democrats do over moderate Republicans from heavily Republican states who side (or appear to side) with Dems (the late John McCain, Susan Collins, Spiff Romney) and you’ll get it. You have to have a gynormous ego to run for president, and Ms. Gabbard certainly is developing a colossal one. Since she has absolutely no chance to win the Democratic nomination in 2020, here’s our bold and fearless, purely comedic conjecture prediction for Ms. Gabbard: she runs for President as a Republican in 2024. Remember: we predicted a Ralph Nader landslide in the 2004 election so . . . yeah . . . we’re . . . probably . . . wrong.

Could it be that Tulsi Gabbard's presidential ambitions may be so great that she'd switch parties in 2024, and because of her impeachment vote, she'd get the blessings of America's current CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and his following of nutcase supporters? Stay tuned, folks!
Could it be that Tulsi Gabbard’s presidential ambitions may be so great that she’d switch parties in 2024, and because of her impeachment vote, she’d get the blessings of America’s current CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and his following of nutcase supporters? Stay tuned, folks!

AZ’s Austerity Democracy


The fallout form Arizona’s election fiasco on March 22nd is still unfolding. Maricopa County Recorder, Helen Purcell, was widely and deservedly vilified for her initial response, where she actually blamed the voters.  Purcell backtracked a few days later and took full responsibility, but the damage was done. Purcell, explained that the number of polling places was cut from 200 to 60(almost 70% reduction… let us repeat that…70 FRIGGING PERCENT REDUCTION!!!) in order to save money. But the truth is that conservative Republicans have a stranglehold on this state and since they’ve gerrymandered the state legislature districts so drastically, there is virtually no way to get them out of power. They’ve clearly passed legislation and cut election funding in order to suppress voters. The office of Maricopa County Recorder is supposed to be a non-partisan position but Ms. Purcell is a staunch Republican and she has been in office since 1988. In several years, she’s run unopposed which has led to the same complacency and smug demagoguery that Joe ‘Just Call Me God’ Arpaio possesses. Let’s just say she’s a good soldier for Republican causes.

Now the federal government is investigating the voter suppression and even Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders and the DNC is suing Maricopa County for voting rights violations. Will Maricopa County increase the number of polling places for the elections later on this year? We’re not holding our breath here. Arizona Republicans want to remain in power come Trump or the apocalypse. Given their anti-federal government viewpoint, this will only strengthen their resolve. You see, austerity democracy works great…for corporate America backed conservative Republicans. The game is definitely rigged here in Arizona for Republicans and they’re not going to change anything any time soon.

Getting back to Ms. Purcell…we do think that she should get on the back of Sheriff Joe’s horse and ride off into the sunset. We’d expect this kind of voting rights violation in a banana republic. But this latest debacle is inexcusable in America and especially in our home state of Arizona. Ms. Purcell needs to resign!

Arizona Maricopa County Recorder Helen Purcell proclaims that democracy is expensive and voters need to quit whining much to the delight of plutocrats everywhere.

Arizona Maricopa County Recorder, Helen Purcell, proclaims that democracy is expensive and voters need to quit whining, much to the delight of plutocrats everywhere.

Speako Englisho

GOP presidential candidate and neo-Neanderthal , Rick “Google Me” Santorum, showed off his diplomatic skills Wednesday while campaigning in Puerto Rico, when he said that for Puerto Rico to become a state, they would have to embrace English as the primary language. Puerto Rico currently is a bilingual U.S. commonwealth and is voting in November on whether or not to pursue statehood. Spanish is also the primary language in the country because of it’s strong Spanish heritage and history. Of course, Santorum’s view is consistent with conservative Republican’s world view that everyone should speak English and Americans should only have to speak English everywhere they go, despite the fact that the majority of people in the Western Hemisphere speak Spanish.  His viewpoint reminds us of when Archie Bunker tried to speak Spanish on an episode of that classic 70’s sitcom, All in the Family. Pues, creemos que Santorum es un pendejo grande!

GOP candidate Rick 'Google Me' Santorum impresses the bilingual crowds in Puerto Rico with his command of the Spanish language.

The White Knight

It’s pretty obvious by the anemic turnout for the primaries and caucuses in the farce that is Con-a-thon 2012, that there are many Republicans who aren’t too thrilled with the four candidates that have survived thus far: Spiff Romney, Rick “Google Me” Santorum, Uncle Newtie Gingrich and that gruff ol’ Prospector Ron “I’m agin’ everything” Paul. Polls also indicate that President Obama would have an easy time beating any of these candidates. There are many articles on the mainstream media sites speaking of a brokered convention and a new ‘white knight’ candidate to ride in and rescue the party from ignominious defeat in November. Well we’ve discovered that a new candidate, who reflects the values of the most extreme conservative Republicans (who just so happen to have a stranglehold on the party), has stepped forward to change the fortunes of the GOP. Finally the ‘white knight’ has arrived!

A ‘White Knight’ candidate has emerged for the Republicans who embodies everything that the extreme right wing conservatives hold dear.

 

Shocking Development: Rich White Guy Wins

The shocking results from New Hampshire are in: a rich, white guy won the GOP primary. In this particular case, it was former Massachusetts governor, Spiff “I’m for everything” Romney winning and crusty ol’ prospector Ron “I’m agin’ everything” Paul coming in second. John “I’ve got three hot daughters” Huntsman finished a surprising third.

It’ll be interesting to see if Huntsman will become the next flavor of the month in this joke that is…drum roll please… Con-a-thon 2012. But for right now, Spiff Romney and his magic underwear are riding high. Will his momentum continue onto the next primary in South Carolina or will Uncle Newtie Gingrich’s ‘Anti-Romney’ campaign bring the Spiffster down? The suspense is just riveting isn’t it folks. How many more months of this crap do we have left?

GOP candidate and corporate hatchetman, Spiff Romney, won the New Hampshire primary handily with chameleon like tactics that will surely please everyone, especially corporate 'people' with deep pockets.