Tag Archive for Maricopa

Arpaio?! Seriously?!

In a stunner that we certainly didn’t see coming, Doug Jones beat bible thumper and teenage girl aficionado, Roy Moore, in a special election and will now be the first Democratic Senator for Alabama in 25 years. This will also hopefully put Moore out of the national spotlight(we’re absolutely sick of him), although he’s still got a lot of ‘splainin’ to do to the women he’s harassed.

So are what are racist, authoritarian, conservative, christian Republicans to do? Have no fear, wingnuts. Fresh from his pardoning by Donald Trump, former Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio announced that “he’s seriously, seriously, seriously considering running for the U.S. Senate” in Arizona. Seriously…that’s right, folks: America’s favorite racist, authoritarian law enforcer says he may run for Jeff Flake’s vacant seat in 2018.

We thought the 85 year old Arpaio was losing it before, but this pretty much makes it official. He got thumped by Paul Penzone for a county level position, and yet he thinks he can seriously win a state wide election given his notoriety. If it wasn’t for his pal Trump, he’d be doing some time. Arizonans are sick of his schtick. We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again. Retire already! Ride off into the sunset like a good former sheriff and leave the good people of Arizona alone. Because you know what…we’re seriously, seriously, seriously NOT voting for you!

Authoritarian, colossal egoist and former Maricopa County Sheriff, Joe Arpaio, announces that he's seriously, seriously, seriously considering a run for the Senate, to which Arizona voters reply that they will seriously, seriously, seriously not vote for him.

Authoritarian, colossal egoist and former Maricopa County Sheriff, Joe Arpaio, announces that he’s seriously, seriously, seriously considering a run for the Senate, to which Arizona voters reply that they will seriously, seriously, seriously not vote for him.

Arpaio To Model Pink Underwear

While John McCain may be staying in Arizona politics for a while longer, another bastion of Arizona conservatism may be riding off into the sunset very soon; Sheriff Joe ‘Just Call Me God’ Arpaio. We’ve commented before about authoritarian, demagogue Sheriff Joe and his crazy support of fellow birther Donald Trump. Now it finally appears that he’s getting his comeuppance for his racial profiling laws. Arpaio has officially been charged with criminal contempt of court and could be spending six months in prison. And of course, all of Sheriff Joe’s shenanigans have cost Arizona taxpayers millions of dollars. On top of this, his Democrat opponent in the Maricopa County sheriff election, Paul Penzone, has a lead on him in the latest polls. What poetic justice: not only will Arpaio finally be retiring from public office, he very well could become a resident of his own infamous creation, Tent City. We hope he enjoys the 100+ degree heat, his pink underwear and green bologna… oh and the undying love and admiration of his fellow inmates.

The inmates of Tent City want a pink underwear fashion show from their new resident, soon to be former Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio.

The inmates of Tent City want a pink underwear fashion show from their new resident, soon to be former Maricopa County Sheriff, Joe Arpaio.

AZ’s Austerity Democracy

The fallout form Arizona’s election fiasco on March 22nd is still unfolding. Maricopa County Recorder, Helen Purcell, was widely and deservedly vilified for her initial response, where she actually blamed the voters.  Purcell backtracked a few days later and took full responsibility, but the damage was done. Purcell, explained that the number of polling places was cut from 200 to 60(almost 70% reduction… let us repeat that…70 FRIGGING PERCENT REDUCTION!!!) in order to save money. But the truth is that conservative Republicans have a stranglehold on this state and since they’ve gerrymandered the state legislature districts so drastically, there is virtually no way to get them out of power. They’ve clearly passed legislation and cut election funding in order to suppress voters. The office of Maricopa County Recorder is supposed to be a non-partisan position but Ms. Purcell is a staunch Republican and she has been in office since 1988. In several years, she’s run unopposed which has led to the same complacency and smug demagoguery that Joe ‘Just Call Me God’ Arpaio possesses. Let’s just say she’s a good soldier for Republican causes.

Now the federal government is investigating the voter suppression and even Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders and the DNC is suing Maricopa County for voting rights violations. Will Maricopa County increase the number of polling places for the elections later on this year? We’re not holding our breath here. Arizona Republicans want to remain in power come Trump or the apocalypse. Given their anti-federal government viewpoint, this will only strengthen their resolve. You see, austerity democracy works great…for corporate America backed conservative Republicans. The game is definitely rigged here in Arizona for Republicans and they’re not going to change anything any time soon.

Getting back to Ms. Purcell…we do think that she should get on the back of Sheriff Joe’s horse and ride off into the sunset. We’d expect this kind of voting rights violation in a banana republic. But this latest debacle is inexcusable in America and especially in our home state of Arizona. Ms. Purcell needs to resign!

Arizona Maricopa County Recorder Helen Purcell proclaims that democracy is expensive and voters need to quit whining much to the delight of plutocrats everywhere.

Arizona Maricopa County Recorder, Helen Purcell, proclaims that democracy is expensive and voters need to quit whining, much to the delight of plutocrats everywhere.

Top AZ Wingnuts Endorse Trump

We’ve commented before about the dismal politicians in our home state of Arizona(here, here, here, and here for starters). And unfortunately, they keep on delivering the crazy much to the embarrassment of reasonable and sane Arizonans.

There’s the primary election fiasco on March 22nd (we’ve got a photo-toon coming on this one.) Then there’s the obstructionism of Arizona’s senators on Obama’s Supreme Court nominee (we’ve got a couple photo-toons coming on this one, too.) But this post deals with the endorsements of Donald Trump by former governor Jan ‘Skeletor’ Brewer and Maricopa County Sheriff Joe ‘Just Call Me God’ Arpaio.

Jan Brewer has never impressed us here at the Bucket. Just take a look at her awful performance in the 2010 gubernatorial debates and you’ll get an idea of her incompetence. She’s like an older, blonder Sarah Palin.

As for Arpaio, he’s been in office so long (since 1992), he thinks he’s not only the law, but that he’s above the law. Now we don’t think Arpaio is all bad. He strongly punishes animal abusers, which is a good thing. And like we’ve said before, the pink underwear and the Tent City thing was a hoot — in the nineties. Arpaio’s schtick has worn thin over the last fifteen years. Now with his support of birtherism, SB 1070 (racial profiling) and being sued for abuse of power and racial profiling by federal prosecutors(which has cost the taxpayers of Maricopa County a whopping $142 million), we think it’s time for Sheriff Joe to ride off into the sunset in true old Western fashion.

We guess it’s no wonder that Arpaio and Brewer endorsed Trump. Look at where the rally for Trump was held prior to the March 22nd primary. Fountain Hills, along with Paradise Valley and North Scottsdale (or Snottsdale as we call it here in these parts), is one of the most exclusive communities in the state and Arpaio lives there. And that pretty much sums up the Republicans motto: exclude everyone except if you’ve got money, you’re christian, you’re white and you accept that because of your fortuitous financial status, you should be able to rule everyone’s life. It’s also not surprising that some protesters got arrested for trying to disrupt the rally. Get used to it America. If Donald Trump becomes President there will be no protesting or free speech. It’s going to be Trump’s way or pink underwear in Sheriff Joe’s Tent City.

Arizona authoritarian demagogues, former Governor Jan 'Skeletor' Brewer and Maricopa County Sheriff Joe 'Just Call Me God' Arpaio announce their support for national, authoritarian demagogue Donald Trump for President, who clarifies who is the bigger God in true Donald Trump fashion.

Arizona authoritarian demagogues, former Governor Jan ‘Skeletor’ Brewer and Maricopa County Sheriff Joe ‘Just Call Me God’ Arpaio announce their support for national, authoritarian demagogue Donald Trump for President, who clarifies who is the bigger God in true Donald Trump fashion.