Satire that shovels it to the public – just like the real media!
Now that we’ve concluded our 2004 RNC retrospective, we’ll be presenting some highlights from the 2012 Republican National Convention in the sham that is Con-a-thon 2012.
It’s nice to see that Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, had so many …eh hem…journalists to cover the proceedings. Edward R. Murrow would sure be proud at the state of modern journalism wouldn’t he.
Here’s the final installment of our RNC 2004 retrospective…
The future plan for America for the Neocons is the same in 2012 as it was in 2004: there will be tax cuts for the 1%ers and corporate welfare especially for oil, gas, energy, insurance, finance and defense corporations which will make the rich richer and demolish the middle class thus creating a super lower class to work for pittances in corporations or the military. And thanks to imperialistic foreign policy, perpetual wars will become the norm. If Romney is elected, you can bet that war with Iran, Syria or some other perceived belligerent will be a certainty. And we’ll stay indefinitely in Afghanistan, the place where empires go to die. Romney will actually make the Dubya years look good. Yes, the future looks pretty bright for neoconservative America.
Continuing with our RNC 2004 retrospective…
In America, the Republican Party has become the party of God and Jesus. Well, we shouldn’t be surprised because Jesus was all about supporting the rich while despising the poor. We’re sure if Jesus came back today he’d be wearing a well tailored Armani suit, driving a BMW and/or a pickup, be a member of an exclusive country club, eating caviar, drinking the finest wines and carrying a loaded gun in case any poor person would think of threatening him. And as for healthcare, he’d say, “If you can’t afford it, well that’s your fault for being poor. Why should I help you?” That’s life in a christian nation. We’re also sure that it was Jesus who steered Tropical Storm Issac away from a direct hit on Tampa and instead directed it toward other red states like Alabama, Louisiana, and Mississippi, which have many poor people, because, you know…he loves Republicans so much.
Continuing with our RNC 2004 retrospective…
Remember when ol’ Dubya yanked our chain by always saying “We’re turning the corner on…<fill in the blank>”. Whether it was the deficit, the war in Iraq, economic recovery, cleaning up after Hurricane Katrina, coming out of the housing market collapse, etc… We were always turning the corner. America turned the corner so many times we kept going in circles in a downward spiral for the next four years.
Continuing with our RNC 2004 retrospective…
We can honestly say the Bush twins were the highlight of the convention. That speaks volumes.
Continuing with our RNC 2004 retrospective…
Here are some Texas Republican sheeple hanging out at the 2004 convention exchanging ideas on how they can be more obedient to Dubya, their christian shepherds and the corporate establishment.
Spiff Romney made it official Saturday as he selected Wisconsin Representative Paul Ryan to be his vice presidential running mate in the cruel joke that is…Con-a-thon 2012. Media pundits on both side of the aisles are ‘energized’ by the picks, which means that there’s going to be plenty of BS thrown around for the final three months of this election, that just won’t seem to end. The pick pretty much proves that the ol’ Spiffer doesn’t give a rat’s ass about the middle class or moderates and if he and Mr. ‘Starve the Guvment, Feed the Rich’ Ryan get into office, we can look forward to reliving those glorious years of the Middle Ages when feudalism held sway over humans everywhere. Remember… your corporate overlords know way more than you do. So just shut up and let them run the country.
Polls across the nation show that Spiff Romney is behind President Obama in the joke that is … Con-a-thon 2012. Conservative Republicans must be panicking because now businessmen have just about taken to consumer blackmail to ensure that Romney gets elected. Papa John founder and CEO, John Schnatter, came out the other day and said that if Obamacare is passed, the price of their pizza will go up. I don’t think it’s too much of a stretch to predict that some businesses will try use these threats of higher prices to affect the outcome of the November election.
This should be no surprise of course since America has been a corporatist state for quite some time. The Supreme Court rules that corporations are people and they can contribute as much money as they want. So naturally they contribute money to the congressional lackeys who will do their bidding and give them maximum profits and minimum taxes. Or as Papa John puts it, shareholders are more important to corporations than the average American’s well being. Or put another way, if you don’t support the candidate of our liking, we’ll take it out on you. Sounds like corporatism to us folks.
Con-a-thon 2012 drags on and on and on…. Isn’t this election over yet? What’s really shocking about this election is the record amount of money spent on the elections. Thanks to the Citizens United decision by our supposedly enlightened Supreme Court, corporations can contribute the moon to buy the election for their favorite lackey, politician. Republican affiliated Super PACs alone are planning on spending one billion dollars on the election. Democrats are estimated to spend anywhere from 100-400 million dollars. Wow! What’s pathetic is that this money could be spent on something more constructive like building infrastructure, paying off America’s debt or … I don’t know…creating jobs and sorry, we don’t consider election jobs real jobs even though nowadays the election cycles seem perpetual. Is this country broken??? Nahhhhhh. Just donate to your nearest Super PAC and don’t worry your pretty little heads about it. The ‘job creators’ are taking care of everything.
Recently, Facebook co-founder Eduardo Saverin renounced his U.S. citizenship, to reside in Singapore, because he didn’t want to pay income taxes on his billions of dollars. What a patriot! To their credit, two senators decried this and announced that he would still have to pay taxes and could be barred from re-entering the country. However, there were several right-wing conservative Republicans who defended his take-the-money-and-run capitalist pig style. No doubt they’ve got their money in off shore tax havens just like the GOP presidential candidate, ol’ Spiff Romney. Way to support America’s infrastructure, guys!
