Tag Archive for logging

Rewind: Dubya’s Healthy Forests

2023 marks the 20th anniversary of the BilgeBucket Gazette. Our first issue was on May 19, 2003 and we’ve been shoveling it to the public, just like the corporate media, ever since. We changed our format to a WordPress blog in 2011 so all of our earlier material was archived. We’ve been reposting many of those archived articles, headlines, photo-toons, BilgeBucket Lists and other content over the past twelve years. In honor of our 20th, and because we’re sick of the current state of affairs in the world, we’ll be reposting more items from 2003 through 2009 throughout this year.

The Republicans have long been anti-science and pro-corporation and it shows in their voting record, the fact that they put industry insiders in key posts in government agencies like the EPA and their incredibly stupid efforts at promoting conservation; Donald Trump’s recommendation at raking forests during the California wildfires a few years ago comes to mind. Which reminds us of Dubya’s promotion of his Healthy Forest Initiative which promotes the logging industry logging the hell out of forests. Hey, if there are no trees left, you can’t have wildfires, right? This article comes from our July 17, 2003 issue.

Bush Proposes New Healthy Forest Initiative

In response to the devastating wildfires in the western United States, President Bush has come up with a new Healthy Forest Initiative designed to reduce future forest fires.

“The idea behind this plan is that we thin the forests so that there are maybe ten or twelve trees per square mile. Maybe even less. That way, if a fire does start, no trees will burn. Forests can’t burn if there are no trees around. See, it’s a healthy forest. It’s a win-win for everyone. It’s a win for the economy. The logging industry will need more lumer . . . lumerber . . . log guys to cut down the trees. More workers will be needed to build the roads for the log guys. This will open up new areas of housing development and enable people to build houses safely in the forest without having to worry about losing their house in case of a fire.”

Mike Scoggins from the Sierra Club then asked, “What about all the wildlife that will be displaced by the thinned forest, new roads and new housing? Where are they going to go?”

President Bush shook his head and said, “People! That’s what zoos are for. All the animals can stay in zoos where we can manage them better. I’m tight with God and it’s his plan that all plants and animals obey their masters! Us!”

Bush then added, “Supporting this initiative is the American thing to do! You Sierra Club lima beans obviously must be for the terrorists!”

Homeland Security agents then rushed Scoggins and lead him away to a detention area for questioning and a good pummeling.

Trump and Pruitt’s EPA: Nothing To See Here Folks


Trump’s EPA, with Scott Pruitt at the helm is the planet’s worst nightmare. We’ve commented before about this climate change denier and complete jackass here and here. This corporate lackey has been single-handedly destroying all the mechanisms in place to keep the coal, gas, oil, mining, logging and polluting industries from running amok and destroying what’s left of our environment. We claim to be a nation of laws. Regulations are laws that corporations have to abide by, just like citizens have to obey civil law. Regulations are an essential check and balance to guarantee that corporations don’t go too far like they did in the twentieth century before the creation of the EPA.

Among the things Pruitt has done recently:

Pruitt and his EPA attacked an AP reporter for reporting about flooded Superfund sites in the Houston area. But apparently journalists are supposed to turn a blind eye, like Republicans do, if there’s any environmental problems. Nothing to see here folks!

Pruitt has gutted water regulations that will allow fracking waste dumping in the Gulf of Mexico. The Gulf is still recovering from the 2010 Deepwater Horizon spill and is now dealing with a new 600,000+ gallon oil spill that the national press doesn’t seem interested in covering because…you know…stock prices might go down. Nothing to see here folks!

Pruitt has issued a directive to curb settlements with outside groups, otherwise known as sue and settle. Showing that he’s a true corporate lackey, this is another attempt by corporations to limit the harm the public can do. On the finance front, look at this week’s vote by Republicans to make it harder for class actions suits against banks and credit card companies. This is because the Republicans care only about their corporate benefactors. They could give a rat’s ass about the consumer protection. Nothing to see here folks!

Pruitt pulls climate change scientists out of a climate change conference because…you know…they might actually show that Pruitt is full of shit. Nothing to see here folks!

Pruitt announces that the EPA will repeal the Clean Power Plan enacted by President Obama. Like other conservative Republicans, they just can’t accept the fact coal is a dying industry and like oil and gas,a thing of the past. It would be much better to invest in clean, renewable energy solutions like wind, solar, hydrogen and biofuels. But again, nothing to see here folks!

Let’s get one thing straight: Scott Pruitt is a lawyer. He knows squat about science. How is it that a lawyer is telling scientists what science is good and what science is bad? He’s got about as much business being head of the EPA as a wolf should be in charge of the hen house. Maybe that’s why he’s increased the security detail around him. He knows he’s being an asshole and he thinks some environmentalist may actually get sick of his shit enough to do something drastic about it. We’ve got a solution Mr. Pruitt: quit being a goddamn dick!!!

Trump administration EPA chief, non-scientist and friend to polluters everywhere, Scott Pruitt is now attacking the press for reporting potentially dangerous leaks and spills to the general public because the precious energy companies may lose their stock value, which in this country is more important than human lives.

Trump administration EPA chief, non-scientist and friend to polluters everywhere, Scott Pruitt is now attacking the press for reporting potentially dangerous leaks and spills to the general public because the precious energy companies may lose their stock value, which in this country is more important than human lives.

Rewind: Delightful Dubya Deceptions


We recently commented about the unbelievable poll that stated that more people viewed George W. Bush favorably now than President Obama, despite the fact that Obama has cleaned up the colossal mess that good ol’ Dubya made here and abroad. Here’s an article from our April 25, 2004 edition which may explain this phenomenon. It seems that people were actually comforted by the Bush Administration’s lies and deceptions.

Many Americans Comforted By Bush Administration Deceptions

According to recent polls, George W. Bush’s approval ratings have improved, despite revelations of deceptions and misinformation from the White House concerning the war in Iraq by Paul O’Neill, Richard Clarke, John Dean and Bob Woodward. The polls indicate that having a lying, deceitful president leading the country comforts many Americans.

Dwight Rodman of Festerville, Oklahoma, said, “That’s what Presidents do. Nixon lied about Watergate. Clinton lied about having sex with all those women. Now Bush has lied about WMDs in Iraq. It’s just the American way. Now if someone told the truth, then I’d worry.”

Mabel Ellis of Port Drudgery, New Jersey, said, “At least President Bush doesn’t have sex with nubile young interns. I can live with a multi-billion dollar war from which we have no clear cut way of exiting and will put us in excruciating debt for years to come. But having sex is something I will not tolerate.”

Theodore M. Farnsworth IV of Crudopolis, Texas, said, “I’m the CEO of a major energy corporation. The President’s lies are keeping the attention off me and all the environmental damage I’m doing by fracking. Four more years!”

Byron G. Caldwell of Big Spud, Idaho, said, “I’m the CEO of a major logging corporation. The President’s lies are keeping the attention off me and all the regulations that are being relaxed so I can plunder America’s forests. Four more years!”

Mildred Dunwiddy of Backwater, South Carolina, said, “Oh, its just a little white lie. Besides, I think the biggest problem this nation is facing is that slut Janet Jackson and her malfunctioning wardrobe.”

Phil Smoots of Gator Crossing, Florida, said, “How can America be worrying about a quagmire in Iraq, when people of the same sex are getting married? I just don’t get this country.”

Jerry Scheissner of Fuddsworth, Missouri, said, “If things are going so bad in Iraq, how come we don’t see any pictures of coffins? How ’bout that, smart guy!”

Rev. Aloysius T. Terry of Piggettstown, Mississippi, said, “I’m an evangelical minister and I say President Bush is leading us one step closer to Armageddon and the Rapture. Halleluiah!”

GOP Sez ‘Science Evil’

The Senate just voted 98-1 that global warming is happening, as if nature needed human consensus that it was real. Of course, the anti-science Republicans aren’t admitting that humans are causing it. Here’s an article from our August 29, 2004 issue, where good ol’ Dubya explains why scientists are ‘evil’ and shouldn’t be trusted, but the saintly oil, mining, timber and energy companies deserve our complete trust.

Bush Dismisses ‘Evil’ Scientists

The Bush Administration deflected recent criticism from numerous preeminent scientists that the White House is distorting and manipulating scientific findings and giving handouts to industries, which have given massive monetary support to the President, like oil, mining, timber and energy companies.

Dr. Jared Reed, environmental biologist and member of the non-profit group, Union Of Concerned Scientists, said, “This administration is far worse than even the Reagan administration. They have rolled back over 300 regulations since Bush has taken over the Presidency. He has loaded the EPA with lobbyists from the mining, logging, and energy industries as payback for their support during the election. He is systematically blacklisting legitimate scientists in favor of consultants who manipulate and massage data to fit his radical ideological agenda. This blatant disregard for the environment and for the health of the general public needs to be stopped before it is too late.”

Bush defended his environmental policies. “People, I mean we all know that this so called ‘global warming’ is caused by cows farting and volcanoes. And this mumbo jumbo that our rivers and streams are polluted; didn’t you see John Stossel jump in the Hudson River. If it’s so polluted, how come he’s still alive? Stem cell research is evil, too. Scientists want to grow babies and then kill ’em folks. That’s just plain evil. Besides, I think I know a little bit more about the world than these smartsy fartsy liberal ‘scientists’. I mean I am the president and I talk to God on a daily basis. We don’t need any more ‘scientific’ studies. If I were doing something wrong here, don’t you think God would say something.”

Vice President Dick Cheney backed Bush’s views. “Our public land is vast and it’s there for Americans to use and exploit. Those damn animals aren’t using it. Why should they have it? Like the great James Watt said, God wants us to subdue nature. I’ll be damned if some fish or butterfly is going to prevent me from making my millions.”

Many citizens have expressed support for Bush’s environmental policies. Lionel Starker of Pusbucket, Arkansas, said, “Me more smart than animal. Me more smart than plant. Me think Bush smart. Me vote Bush.”

Reverend Delbert Dillman of the Third Evangelical Church of The Apocalypse said, “Thanks to President Bush, the Apocalypse is now closer then ever. We need to hurry up and use all of God’s resources before the end of the world. Can I get an amen?”