Tag Archive for Wilbur Ross

Hurricane Commander

The Trump administration recently added another level to its already towering pile of preposterous bullshit it has spewed upon the American electorate in the last three years. Apparently, now meteorologists have to check with our dear leader before making any weather forecasts. Yes, America’s CEO/Dictator Donald Trump’s ego is so weak and fragile that telling him he’s wrong on weather forecasts could get you fired.

It all started when Hurricane Dorian approached the Bahamas and was threatening Florida and the southeastern United States. Trump tweeted that people in Florida, Georgia and the Carolinas should be aware but he also included Alabama. Now when Dorian was passing by Puerto Rico, spaghetti plots suggested that maybe Alabama would get hit. But as the cyclone approached the Bahamas days later, it became evident from the updated forecast models that Alabama was in little to no danger. The models had changed. This is when Trump sent out his infamous tweet. The National Weather Service in Alabama tweeted a correction to Trump’s tweet stating that Alabamans need not worry because they were not threatened.

Now a normal, sane human being would just say, “Oops. My bad.” and get on with life. Not Trump. No, the orange haired, megalomaniac man child in the White House who in his warped conservative mind is never wrong and claims to be the ‘chosen one’ doubled down and presented a weather chart a few day later that had obviously been altered by a sharpie to include Alabama in the forecast’s cone of uncertainty. This touched off Sharpiegate which unfortunately has taken center stage over the death and destruction that occurred in the Bahamas due to Hurricane Dorian.

To make matters worse, an unsigned notice from admin people in NOAA(National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration) popped up last week saying they were wrong to contradict the President. Apparently, Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross threatened that heads would roll if the meteorologists didn’t apologize to dear leader. Of course, meteorologists, scientists and thinking intelligent humans are not accepting this at all and calls for Ross’s resignation have been inundating the White House like storm surge from a hurricane.

And then, just because he’s the biggest asshole on the planet, Trump forbade a ship full of storm survivors from the Bahamas to dock in Florida because. . . you know . . . there might be ‘very bad people’ trying to sneak in with the refugees. What a dick!

The point is that Donald Trump is so unstable that he shouldn’t be counted on for anything, even compassion for his fellow human beings. Think about it. Meteorologists have to make sure their forecasts don’t offend or contradict the President? Hurricane victims who just lost everything can’t even seek refuge within the United States? Are you kidding???!!! His incompetence isn’t funny anymore, it’s frightening. He’s a danger to this country and the planet. He is subverting democracy right under our noses. World events, like the recent Saudi Arabia attacks, are happening now that need a calm cool head, not an idiot who thinks he’s the ‘chosen one’, denies climate change yet somehow can control the weather and will never admit he’s wrong even when you shove the facts in his face. Democrats, grow a spine and do your job! IMPEACH THIS JOKER – NOW!!!

American CEO/Dictator, stable genius, bestest weatherman ever, hurricane commander and the self proclaimed 'chosen one', Donald Trump, gets tough with a menacing tropical cyclone when it changes course and doesn't follow his commands.
American CEO/Dictator, stable genius, bestest weatherman ever, hurricane commander and the self proclaimed ‘chosen one’, Donald Trump, gets tough with a menacing tropical cyclone when it changes course and doesn’t follow his commands.

The Swamp Keeper

One of Donald Trump’s biggest promises during the 2016 election was that he would drain the swamp. The fact of the matter is that he hasn’t drained the swamp at all but, to the contrary, has restocked it with industry insiders, lobbyists and Wall Street plutocrats who have every intention of bringing down the government while filling up their own coffers. One of these swamp creatures is Wilbur Ross, who we’ve commented on before on his willing ignorance of Saudi customs and the plight of the modern day middle class.

Well, it turns out that Wilbuuuuurrr is being held in contempt of court, along with Attorney General Bill Barr, for his role in trying to get an illegal citizenship question on the census. America’s CEO/Dictator and petulant man child, Donald Trump, has been none too happy with this filthy rich plutocrat and rumors are swirling that Ross’s days in the cabinet may be through.

But fear not Wilbuuuuurrr fans. We’ve noticed that this filthy rich plutocrat bear a striking resemblance to the Cryptkeeper from the classic anthology series Tales from the Crypt. We have no doubt that if Hollywood decides to reboot this series, Ross would be a natural. He’s already shown adeptness at keeping the swamp in Washington D.C.; we’re sure he’ll be able to entertain all the boils and ghouls with his rapid fire wit and ghastly puns.

Commerce Secretary, plutocrat and swamp creature, Wilbur Ross, bears a striking resemblance to the Cryptkeeper and has even developed his own punny quips to nauseate all the boils and ghouls.
Commerce Secretary, plutocrat and swamp creature, Wilbur Ross, bears a striking resemblance to the Cryptkeeper and has even developed his own punny quips to nauseate all the boils and ghouls.

Let Them Get A Loan

Wow! Is Wilbur Ross clueless or what?! We’ve commented before about the Secretary of Commerce’s absolute lack of knowledge about foreign countries like Saudi Arabia. But this inane plutocrat showed off a stunning lack of empathy or insight into the plight of the average American, many who are living paycheck to paycheck. As the Trump government shutdown has dragged on for over a month, many federal employees were working for free! Some were having difficulties paying their mortgages, bills or even feeding their families.

Enter Wilbur Ross, spoiled plutocrat. Last week during the Trump government shutdown, Wilbuuuuurrr noted that instead of standing in line for food, federal workers ought to suck it up and go get a nice low interest loan while their not getting their paychecks. What sound financial advice! That’s right, poor person. Go try and get a loan that you probably can’t get because you’re already in debt up to your eyeballs. While you’re at it, maybe¬† get a loan for a yacht or maybe even by that dream cottage in the Hamptons. What a compassionate conservative!

This was Wilbuuuuurrr’s ‘Let Them Eat Cake’ moment and we think good ol’ Mr. Ed would probably be able to explain it best to this insipid, uncaring, out of touch bonehead of a plutocrat.

Talking horse and connoisseur of the name Wilbuuuuurrr, Mr. Ed, explains to Secretary of Commerce and 'compassionate' conservative plutocrat, Wilbuuuuurrrr Ross, that his suggestion to federal workers, who are barely squeaking by during Trump's government shutdown, that they should just suck it up and get a loan was colossally clueless.

Talking horse and connoisseur of the name Wilbuuuuurrr, Mr. Ed, explains to Secretary of Commerce and ‘compassionate’ conservative plutocrat, Wilbuuuuurrrr Ross, that his suggestion to federal workers, who are barely squeaking by during Trump’s government shutdown, that they should just suck it up and get a loan was colossally clueless.

Wilbuuuuurrr’s Deception

American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump is on his first world tour and lo and behold his first stop isn’t traditional allied countries like France, Germany or Great Britain, it’s authoritarian paradise Saudi Arabia. Secretary of Commerce and plutocrat, Wilbur Ross, went with him and when he wasn’t sleeping, he noted that there was not one instance of protest against Trump. Fortunately, the journalist conducting the interview corrected Ross, stating protests aren’t allowed in Saudi Arabia, to which Ross fumbled around like the old, fussbudget billionaire he is, embarrassing himself and his country.

We think that even good ol’ Mr. Ed would probably be able to explain it best to Wilbuuuuurrr about the stupidity of his inane remarks .

Talking horse and connoisseur of the name Wilbur, Mr. Ed, corrects Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross's insipid comment about nobody protesting in Saudi Arabia.

Talking horse and connoisseur of the name Wilbuuuuurrr, Mr. Ed, explains to Secretary of Commerce Wilbuuuuurrrr Ross how utterly asinine his insipid comments were about nobody protesting in Saudi Arabia.