Tag Archive for Dr. Oz

Let Them Eat Crudité

We take a brief detour from our coverage on Arizona’s insane GOP politicians to cover the unfortunate Senate campaign of one of Oprah’s creations, Dr. Mehmut Oz, who is running for Senator in Pennsylvania and is approved by TFG. We’ve commented before about this charlatan with a stethoscope when he famously said that children dying from COVID was acceptable during the pandemic in the summer of 2020. He’s already received tons of criticism for living in New Jersey and running in Pennsylvania. He’s also backed some sketchy health care solutions as well using his fame to push said products. But the bad doctor really stepped in some dog doo recently.

Well, Dr. Ooooze has been trying to convince people that he is an ‘everyman’ instead of a rich, spoiled hoidy-toid. First of all, he told people in an interview that he had only two houses to sound like a normal middle class American because doesn’t every American have two houses. LIE! LIE! LIE! LIE! LIE! He has at least ten properties, which certainly places him in an elitist category. One house is 9,000 square feet and another is 7,000 square feet! Who needs that much?! A greedy, materialistic, corporatist quack, that’s who. Next, Dr. Ooooze goes grocery shopping to complain about high prices and starts asking around for the crudité. Now we here at the Bucket didn’t know what the hell crudité was. Fortunately, Dr. Ooooze’s opponent Democrat John Fetterman trolled him royally by presenting a veggie tray. That’s right, folks. Crudité is just a fancy veggie tray. So much for the bad doctor being a regular guy. Like we’ve said before, Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil are Oprah’s two biggest mistakes. Hopefully, Pennsylvanians will realize what a huckster and clown Ooooze is and send him packing back to his real home in New Jersey or one of his other nine properties.

Overrated doctor and clown politician Dr. Mehmet Oz recently tried to show everyone what a regular guy he was by shopping for some crudité at his local grocers, while maybe adding some foie gras, pinot noir and Grey Poupon, of course.
Overrated doctor and clown politician Dr. Mehmet Oz recently tried to show everyone what a regular guy he was by shopping for some crudité at his local grocers, while maybe adding some foie gras, pinot noir and Grey Poupon, of course.

The Return of the Medieval Barber

America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator and ‘stable genius’ Donald Trump provided more evidence of his superior brain last week when he suggested that maybe it would be possible to rid ourselves of the coronavirus scourge by just maybe injecting some disinfectant into our bodies or perhaps shine some light into our bodies so that pesky virus will die already and Trump’s stock market can grow again and his troglodyte followers can get haircuts and attend his stupid rallies to bask in his wisdom.

Of course, Trump has already received tons of flack for his pushing of hydroxychloroquine as a possible cure for COVID-19 despite scientific evidence to the contrary. But then again, facts have never been a hindrance for Trump. In his petulant, warped, authoritarian mind, the truth is what he says it is. What is Trump’s next suggestion going to be? Will he channel the medieval barbers of yore and posit that leeches and a good blood-letting will cure you? Maybe drill some holes in the skull to let the bad humors out? They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but no knowledge, especially in the leader of the free world, is proving to be catastrophic.

We noted in our last post that TV clown doctors, Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz, both came to Trump’s rescue by touting reopening the country despite all evidence pointing to the fact we’re not ready yet. But what is truly amazing is that none of the medical professionals like Dr. Fauci and Dr. Birx will come right out and tell Donald Trump to shut the hell up. Dr. Fauci has spoken out afterward, but never to his face. And Dr. Birx just seems to hide behind her facade of multi-colored scarves, chomping at the bit but saying nothing. But then again, that’s typical for today’s modern, fascist, authoritarian loving Republican party. Just do what dear Leader says and shut the hell up. Enjoy your Clorox cocktails everyone!

The Return of the Medieval Barber: America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator, stable genius and top notch medical professional Donald Trump surmises that a Clorox cocktail, leeches and blood-letting is the best prescription for cleaning out the coronavirus from a patient’s body which pleases his horde of greedy, sycophantic Republican lackeys who desperately want the country to reopen, consequences be damned. Rated R for Regressive.
The Return of the Medieval Barber: America’s Impeached CEO/Dictator, stable genius and top notch medical professional Donald Trump surmises that a Clorox cocktail, leeches and blood-letting is the best prescription for cleaning out the coronavirus from a patient’s body which pleases his horde of greedy, sycophantic Republican lackeys who desperately want the country to reopen, consequences be damned. Rated R for Regressive.

The Derp Doctors

Last week, Fox News, a.k.a. the Republican Propaganda Network, trotted out two famous television doctors, Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz, to spew forth reasons why America should open up the economy despite nationally, being nowhere close to flattening the curve of the coronavirus pandemic. Both doctors, surprisingly enough, got their big break from the queen of all media Oprah Winfrey. Staff member Chester Einstein has always been a huge fan of Ms. Winfrey, but when it comes to Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz, he’s reduced to twiddling his lips. Quoting Chester, “These guys are clowns!” And from what these TV physicians said last week, we’re inclined to agree. As a matter of fact, we think they’re Oprah’s two biggest mistakes.

First, Dr. Phil. We’ve always thought his folksy prescriptions for living a better life were a bit reminiscent of a snake oil salesman. We even created a BilgeBucket list of Dr. Phils folksiest pieces of advice bullshit for improving your life. We’re particularly fond of ” If you can con Oprah into thinking you know something, start pricing solid gold houses .” Remember, she was hoodwinked by author James Frey. Anyway, Dr. Phil started making ill-advised and completely inappropriate comparisons of COVID-19 deaths to swimming pool, auto accident and smoking deaths. He stated basically that people die all the time, why not just open up the country.

Dr. Oz made a similar tone deaf argument stating that we need to open up schools as soon as possible, saying that a 2-3% death rate for children might be considered acceptable. Really!!!??? This quack has already been backpedaling on his comments about hydroxychloroquine. Now this blubbering bonehead, along with Dr. Phil are moonwalking more than Michael Jackson. One thing’s for sure: Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz are now America’s Derp Doctors. Trust them at your own risk, America.

Oprah discoveries Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil have officially become America's Derp Doctors with their tone deaf prescriptions for opening up the economy despite the coronavirus curve not even being close to flattening.
Oprah discoveries Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil have officially become America’s Derp Doctors with their tone deaf prescriptions for opening up the economy despite the coronavirus curve not even being close to flattening.