Teabaggers Spew Forth…Wisdom?

The Occupy Wall Street movement has entered it’s fourth week and appears to be gaining strength. Demonstrations against Wall Street greed have broken out in many major cities. Even major media outlets have taken notice(albeit reluctantly). But of course, these demonstrators can’t compare to those darlings of patriotic protesters, the Teabaggers (we here at the Bucket choose to use their original moniker instead of their Foxified name, the Tea Party movement).

The Teabaggers have been quite a media sensation the last couple of years. This group of supposedly cheezed off ‘patriots’, supported by business interests and media outlets such as Fox News a.k.a The Republican Propaganda Network, have stated that they are against anyone paying more taxes(even the rich) and against socialized medicine (except Medicare) and against entitlement programs (except Social Security and corporate entitlements) and against socialism and for more christianity (forget that Jesus was a socialist). To anyone who doubts that this group is full of **it, it’s interesting that during the Bush administration, which increased the size of government, increased the deficit, increased military spending, and increased the national debt, these bastions of conservatism didn’t protest one bit. But the second, President Obama took the oath of office, these ‘patriots’ are all up in arms about fiscal responsibility. To top it off, their ideal person to solve all our problems is none other than … Ms. Ubetcha herself, Sarah Palin. Which also brings to mind, if the media is so ‘liberal’ like El Rushblo claims, then why was there a joint CNN/Teabagger debate for Republican candidates recently? We would think a ‘liberal’ media would be doing exactly to the Teabaggers what they’ve been doing to the Occupy Wall Street protesters and that would be ignoring them. Things that make you go hmmmmmmm.

The text in the word balloons in this photo-toon is actual verbiage from Teabagger protest signs. To see more examples of these insightful, intelligent, witty signs, click here. The Teabaggers write their own jokes by just being themselves.

Cactus Corner residents and Teabagger Patriots Harold and Martha Kowalski spew forth pearls of wisdom to their fellow patriots.

 

Holy Huckster Pat Man!

Pat Robertson recently made the news by making yet another controversial statement. Big surprise, right? This time Mr. 700 stated that he thought it might be okay for a man or woman to get a divorce if their spouse had Alzheimers, which kind of goes against the phrase “’til death do you part” in christian wedding ceremonies. Compassionate conservatism in action, folks! Well, who are we to question Power Pat. After all he talks to God on a daily basis just like Dubya and the Palinator and Michelle Bachmann and Rick Perry and… we’re sensing a trend here. For more comments from the hilarious Pat Robertson, click here.

Here’s a photo-toon from our June 19, 2006 issue, which came out not long after the then 76 year old claimed he could leg press 2000 lbs. The power of christ (and excessive bullshitting) compels ye!

Televangelist Pat Robertson, who recently claimed to leg press 2,000 pounds, hefts a ton of weights over his head. Robertson earlier in the day had defeated the Miami Heat and the Carolina Hurricanes singlehandedly.

Dick and Dubya’s Act

This will be the last installment of our Dick Cheney retrospective because quite frankly we’re sick of him and we want him to go far away, like maybe Iraq. He’d be greeted with flowers there and he’d be downright giddy being around all that precious oil. So here is a photo-toon from our May 9, 2004 issue right after Dick and Dubya testified in a secret, off the record testimony before the 9/11 commission (you know the manure was flying in that meeting). We think this photo-toon succinctly captures the essence of the Bush presidency.

President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney performed their patented bamboozling act before the 9/11 Commission last week.

Greeted With Flowers

Continuing with our Dick Cheney retrospective…

Here’s a photo-toon from our March 11, 2007 issue. At that time, Afghanistan had set a record in opium production and that it had increased ever since the U.S. occupation started in 2001. Production has dropped since the all time high in 2007, but it is still higher than in was before the occupation. Here’s a link to a Wikipedia article about the subject. Well at least the occupation has been good for one business besides the defense industry.

Vice President Dick Cheney recently visited with Afghanistan President Hamid Karzai and together they walked the Afghan poppy fields where opium production was up from 4100 tons in 2005 to a record 6100 tons in 2006.

Dick’s New Hunting Partner

Our Dick Cheney retrospective continues…

Here’s another photo-toon from the March 1, 2006 issue. Remember, about the same time that Uncle Dick shot Harry Whittington, that pillar of honesty, Scooter Libby was giving testimony in his perjury, making false statements and obstruction of justice trial. Well there was quite a stir when Libby said the then Vice President authorized him to leak classified information in 2003 to bolster the case for the US-led war against Iraq. What a Dick! We knew right then and there who Uncle Dick’s new hunting partner would be.

 

After Scooter Libby’s recent testimony implicating Dick Cheney in the Valerie Plame leaks, the Vice President decided to take Libby on a hunting trip.


Apologizing’s For Wimps

Our Dick Cheney retrospective continues…

In our last post, we mentioned the infamous quail hunting incident on February 11, 2006, when then Vice President Dick Cheney shot an acquaintance, Harry Whittington, in the face, neck and chest with buckshot while trying to blast some birds into oblivion. Not only did Uncle Dick wait 18 hours to report the incident, he also never really apologized to Whittington, who suffered severe health problems from the shooting. But what really amazed us was that Whittington apologized to Cheney saying, “My family and I are deeply sorry for all that Vice President Cheney and his family have had to go through this past week.” Wow!  The guy gets shot in the face and he apologizes to the guy who shot him. Unbelievable! Some conservative Republicans are certainly sheep when it comes to authority figures. Here’s a link to an article about Whittington not receiving an apology. Here’s a Wikipedia link to the whole sordid hunting trip.

Here’s a photo-toon from our March 1, 2006 issue. You’ll note that Uncle Dick resembles a certain character from Lord of the Rings. From February 2004 up until February 2009, we depicted Cheney as Gollum in our photo-toons. We got the idea when we were looking at one of the animations on Mark Fiore’s excellent site. He presented Cheney as a Gollum-like creature in a never ending pursuit of his ‘precious’ oil in Iraq. Brilliant! We know a good thing when we see it, so we also presented Cheney in a similar vein. Is it disrespectful? Yep! But then again look at the absolute mess Uncle Dick and Dubya left us after eight years in office. What a Dick!

 

Harry Whittington appears with Vice President Dick Cheney to show he’s fit as a fiddle and ready to grovel again.

Uncle Dick’s Gun Lust

Our Dick Cheney retrospective continues…

Former Vice President Dick Cheney sure loves his guns. Remember, when he shot an acquaintance while quail hunting and didn’t apologize to the guy. What a Dick! We’ll have more photo-toons on that later this week.

Today, here’s a photo-toon from our April 8, 2009 issue. Just look at Dick’s face(it’s not photoshopped). It’s true love, folks! Maybe conservative Republicans will go for man-gun marriages.

Extreme über patriot and Fox News personality, Glenn Beck, who loves America more than all other Americans combined, gives former Vice-President Dick Cheney a voluptuous gun for the future conservative uprising in America.
Extreme über patriot and Fox News personality, Glenn Beck, who loves America more than all other Americans combined, gives former Vice-President Dick Cheney a voluptuous gun for the future conservative uprising in America.


He’s Baaaaacck!

Just when you thought it was safe, former Vice President Dick Cheney has emerged from his underground lair with a new tell all book about the Bush administration and (drumroll please)… nothing was Uncle Dick’s fault. The Dickster pretty much lays all the blame for everything that went wrong in Iraq on Condi Rice, Colin Powell and George Tenet and in typical Dick form, apologizes for nothing. He also praises Dubya as an outstanding leader. Well, we’ll just read the reviews of the book because we think the only thing Dick does well is spread the manure on thick and high.

So we’ve decided for the next few days, we’d repost some of the worst of Uncle Dick during his time in the Bush administration. We’ll start off with a link to an interview he did back in 1994 for a conservative think tank, American Enterprise Institute. He states in the interview that if George H.W. Bush had sent in troops to Baghdad in 1991 a quagmire would have resulted. Whaaaaaaaaaa!!! So, Cheney knew the Iraq War and Occupation would be a quagmire and yet he lied to the American people in 2003 by saying we’d be greeted as liberators. What a Dick!!

Dubya Spent 1020 Days on Vacation

There were blurbs on most websites today stating that some people are criticizing President Obama for taking a 10 day vacation right now. Those ‘some people’ are basically Fox News and neocons who have conveniently short memories when it comes to presidential vacations. Of his time in office, George W. Bush spent 1020 days on vacation, the most of any President in history. And at this time in Dubya’s presidency(almost 3 years), he had spent 180 days on vacation. Obama has spent a grand total of 61 days on vacation, a mere drop in the bucket compared to Bush. And let’s not forget that in August 2001, Dubya spent most of August patriotically clearing brush on his Crawford ranch ignoring stupid memos about ‘terrorists determined to strike inside the U.S.’.

Let’s revisit one of Dubya’s finer moments when he was looking for scapegoats for the botched Iraqi intelligence which led to the Iraq occupation fiasco. This is from our April 10, 2005 issue.

President Bush announces that the real culprits responsible for Iraqi intelligence failures were the adorable little imps from the Family Circus comic strips, Not Me and Ida Know.

The Party of No, No, No

Some things never change. The debt ceiling talks breakdown this past week reminds me of a Pic of the Week photo-toon from February 6, 2009 at the beginning of Obama’s first term as President.  You see, according to Republicans, the definition of bi-partisanship is doing exactly what they want. Of course, it looks like Obama, like every other Democrat except Alan Grayson and Al Franken, is going to do a submissive roll to these whiny, sucky crybabies.

 

Whiny, sucky, ‘bipartisan’ GOP congressmen and senators do what they do best.