The Cactus Corners Singles Adventure Club is a singles club for adventure seeking individuals in the Cactus Corners, Arizona area. The BilgeBucket Gazette’s own Dex Rexter is a member of this fun loving group and has agreed to post upcoming events in an effort to boost membership. Meetings occur every other Friday at the Pink Gecko Karaoke Lounge in the Cactus Blossoms Strip Mall. Here are the exciting events planned for the coming weeks.

• Thursday, May 17th – Origami Cactus Party at Maggie Bell’s house. Everybody will create their own origami cacti. Maggie will supply the paper, you supply the booze.
• Saturday, May 19th – I Hate Men Night at Mistress Spankarella’s dungeon. Women, get your aggressions out on all men as Mistress Spankarella straps some poor schlep on the Wheel of Pain for some big time retribution. A male volunteer is needed. Hello. Anyone?
• Monday, May 21st – Midnight rollerblading at Cactus Wash Drainage Ditch. Be sure to bring your flashlights, because it’s crazy dark down there. Word has it the concrete is a bit uneven, too. Helmets and pads are optional.
• Thursday, May 24th – Candyland Night at Dale Carlson’s house. Bring your own sweets to enjoy while navigating Gumdrop Pass and Lollipop Woods. The night’s overall winner wins a big, 12 inch, candy cane courtesy of Dale.
  
• Sunday, May 27th – Thin the Herd Hike planned at Rattler’s Canyon in the Buzzard Mountains southwest of Gila Bend. This remote, isolated area, miles from the nearest hospital, is noted for it’s abundance of poisonous critters like the Western Diamondback rattlesnake, the Gila Monster, the bark scorpion and numerous other exciting, deadly animals. Be sure to wear as little clothing as possible because it will be plenty hot out. Don’t worry about water, either. Our 75 year old map says there’s a small stream in the canyon.
  
• Wednesday, May 30th – Happy Hour at Café Muy Caro in Cactus Pavilions Strip Mall. Join us for lackluster conversation, somewhat edible food, and tremendously overpriced drinks. Be sure to bring your credit cards, because you’ll get reamed worse here than at the gas pump.
• Friday, June 1st –Casino Night at Cactus Valley Casino. This casino guarantees not only the loosest slots in town, but also the loosest sluts. Spend your paycheck at the blackjack tables; lose your mortgage payment at the craps table; or just get loaded from the free drinks served by the sexiest waitresses this side of Ahwatukee. Plus, relive the glorious music of 1980’s super group Wang Chung with the Wang Chung Experience in the Charlie Callas Room. Like the song sez: Everyone have fun tonight, everyone Wang Chung tonight!
  
• Sunday, June 3rd – Hike planned at Grommet’s Ravine near Wickenburg. This area used to be an industrial waste dump and has been semi-cleaned up. If we’re lucky, we’ll see a few wild dogs with two tails, five legged cats and three-eyed mice. Wear waterproof shoes since some of the left over toxic sludge tends to eat through shoe leather and skin.