{"id":1750,"date":"2012-06-08T17:23:58","date_gmt":"2012-06-09T00:23:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/?p=1750"},"modified":"2018-03-31T18:22:52","modified_gmt":"2018-04-01T01:22:52","slug":"bush-worst-environmental-president-ever","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/?p=1750","title":{"rendered":"Conservatives Without Conservation"},"content":{"rendered":"

We read an article online ranking the worst environmental presidents in history and to no one’s surprise, ol’ Dubya ranked as the worst<\/a>. And not surprisingly, many Republican presidents were equally as bad (St. Ronald Reagan was 2nd). There’s not a lot of conservation in today’s conservative. Why can’t more Republicans see the environment like Teddy Roosevelt did: something to be preserved for future generations to enjoy. Oh that’s right: there’s money to be made.<\/p>\n

Here’s an article from our August 14, 2003 issue, back when Dubya was in favor of corporate sponsorship of our National Parks. Talk about putting the wolves in the sheep pen.<\/p>\n

Exxon-Mobil To Sponsor Yellowstone Park<\/h3>\n

As part of President Bush’s plan to outsource federal jobs to the private sector, Yellowstone National Park will now be sponsored by Exxon-Mobil.<\/p>\n

“We are very pleased with this development,” said President Bush. “This will cut federal costs and will result in the park running more efficiently.” He paused and then added, “Oh and we’ll also get to drill for more Texas tea.”<\/p>\n

Exxon-Mobil spokesman, Walter B. Jamieson said, “This will be the greatest park in the world. We’ll put in some roller coasters, five star hotels, and world class shopping. Of course, the wildlife will be perfectly preserved. They’ll be placed in zoos. And get this, the kids will get to pet, feed and kill their own buffaloes. What a deal!”<\/p>\n

Yellowstone visitor, eight year old, Kimmy Taylor was excited about the new park. “This park is so boring now. I can’t wait to ride the new rides, play arcade games and plug a buffalo.”<\/p>\n

Exxon-Mobil employees will be stationed throughout the park, guiding tourists to shopping, pointing out old points of interest and explaining why privatization of national parks is a good, necessary, patriotic thing to do.<\/p>\n

Park officials also plan to open up drill sites to tourists so they can see a good old fashioned oil strike. “If you think Ol’ Faithful was something,” said Jamieson. “Wait until you get a load of a gusher spurting that beautiful black gold into the air. Oh God! Oh God!!! What a sight!!!!” Jamieson then excused himself and went to the bathroom to masturbate.<\/p>\n

Other proposed corporate sponsorships include: Georgia-Pacific Redwood National Park, Texaco Zion National Park, and Phelps Dodge Grand Canyon National Park.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We read an article online ranking the worst environmental presidents in history and to no one’s surprise, ol’ Dubya ranked as the worst. And not surprisingly, many Republican presidents were equally as bad (St. Ronald Reagan was 2nd). There’s not a lot of conservation in today’s conservative. Why can’t more Republicans see the environment like … Continue reading “Conservatives Without Conservation”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[379,144,61,60,49,8,3,1715],"tags":[50,22,20,46,420,9,235,570,19,569],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1750"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1750"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1750\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1765,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1750\/revisions\/1765"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1750"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1750"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1750"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}