{"id":1176,"date":"2012-02-03T21:03:46","date_gmt":"2012-02-04T04:03:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/?p=1176"},"modified":"2012-02-03T21:03:46","modified_gmt":"2012-02-04T04:03:46","slug":"rewind-top-excuses-for-2006-arizona-cardinals","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/?p=1176","title":{"rendered":"Rewind: Top Excuses For 2006 Arizona Cardinals"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Back to our Sports BS&#8230; and picking on the pre-Ken Whisenhunt Arizona Cardinals. Here&#8217;s a BilgeBucket List from our November 13, 2006 issue.<\/p>\n<p>Well it\u2019s November so that means the football Cardinals are battling it out for the cellar of their division. Since the Cardinals moved to the Valley of the Sun in 1988, they\u2019ve had one winning season in 1998 with a record of 9-7. They did win a first round playoff game against the Cowboys that year, but come on; this team bites it! Year in and year out, this teams finds a way to lose! Playing in a brand new stadium, the Cardinals are 1-8 and are the worst team in the NFL. What\u2019s the one constant lo these many years: dweebish owner Bill Bidwell. So we say to Mr. Bidwell, do the football fans of Arizona a favor and just sell this team already! Now that our soapbox moment has passed, we present the top excuses for this year\u2019s Cardinals team.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong><em><em>Our new multi-million dollar stadium is nice but we need a newer one if we\u2019re going to have a winning record <\/em> <\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>The opponents make funny faces and we start laughing <\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>We can\u2019t seem to play well if people are watching us <\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>We are grossly underpaid<\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>Matt Leinart is distracted by all the commercial scripts he\u2019s got to memorize<\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>We can\u2019t run because our cheerleaders keep giving us boners<\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>Coach Green scares us <\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>It\u2019s too damn hot here!<\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>We keep thinking about those BBQ Ribs at Mr. B\u2019s Bowtie Barbecue<\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em>We\u2019re still recovering from quarterback Jim Hart\u2019s retirement in the early \u201880s <\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><\/em><em><em><em>We need a mascot a little more intimidating than an 8 inch, seed eating, red bird; we\u2019re friggin\u2019 football players damn it! <\/em> <\/em> <\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em><em><em><\/em>We\u2019re blinded by Bill Bidwell\u2019s incandescent charisma <\/em> <\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on the_content --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on the_content -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Back to our Sports BS&#8230; and picking on the pre-Ken Whisenhunt Arizona Cardinals. Here&#8217;s a BilgeBucket List from our November 13, 2006 issue. Well it\u2019s November so that means the football Cardinals are battling it out for the cellar of their division. Since the Cardinals moved to the Valley of the Sun in 1988, they\u2019ve &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/?p=1176\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Rewind: Top Excuses For 2006 Arizona Cardinals&#8221;<\/span><\/a><!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[358,181],"tags":[377,368,376,367,322],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1176"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1176"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1176\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1180,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1176\/revisions\/1180"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1176"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1176"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bilgebucket.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1176"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}