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Spineless Ted Cruz

We know the first of the Presidential Debates was last night, but so much crap is happening, we’re having a hard time keeping up. We’ll be commenting on the debate results soon.

In a not so surprising move to us here at the Bucket, Ted Cruz endorsed authoritarian megalomaniac, Donald Trump, for President, which pretty much proves all those nasty things Trump and Cruz said to each other was political theater and absolute bullshit. It also proves that Ted Cruz doesn’t really have much integrity. We hope he enjoys cleaning up Trump’s trail of bullshit with Suckinupagus Chris Christie. Better get those waders out boys…it’s gonna get deep!

Donald Trump orders his new lackey Ted Cruz to help Suckinupagus Chris Christie clean his shorts- his undershorts.

Smuggest Senator alive and spineless suck-up, Ted Cruz, freely chooses a life of servile lackeydom to authoritarian megalomaniac and GOP nominee, Donald Trump.

 

Cruz Sez Diplomacy Is For Pussies

This past week, the Obama administration not only pulled off a prisoner exchange where they swapped 7 Iranians for 4 Americans who had been held for years on false charges, but they also got 10 U.S. Navy sailors, who had accidentally drifted into Iranian waters, released within one day. You’d think everyone, including the GOP, would be ecstatic over these displays of calm and cool diplomacy. But NOOOOOOOOOOO! The ridiculous, whining, crybaby Republican candidates for president did nothing but criticize the Obama administration saying the exchange made America look weak. Ted Cruz, Teabagger darling and the smuggest senator alive, even said that the only reason the sailors were taken in the first place was because of the weakness of Obama. Of course, the Republicans  would have started World War III and nuked them ’til they glowed because that’s what manly men do. Screw life on earth, there are gargantuan egos and pride at stake. Yes, there’s nothing like administering 19th century, ‘wild west’ philosophy in the 21st century.

Ted Cruz declares that diplomacy is for pussies and that he'd nuke Iran unitl they glowed.

GOP candidate and smuggest Senator alive, Ted Cruz, gives Americans a hint at what foreign policy would be like during a possible Cruz presidency.

 

NASA On Cruz Control

From the ‘You’ve got to be kidding me’ file…anti-science enthusiast and the smuggest human alive, Ted Cruz, has been named chair of the Subcommittee on Space, Science and Competitiveness. Gee, what better person to put in charge of Science than a religious, nut case, teabagger who is ‘skeptical of the scientific theory’ of global warming, this despite a consensus of 97% of climate scientists that climate change is happening. With a man like Cruz, who barely believes in gravity, you can kiss NASA goodbye, even though he claims he’ll increase funding for NASA. Maybe he’ll put creationist, Ken Ham, in charge of NASA. The hijinx would really start then! We think, NASA should invite Senator Cruz on board a test flight and ‘accidentally’ shoot him into space. That would be a win for Planet Earth.

Texas Senator Ted Cruz calls himself Mr. Science and names Creation Museum founder, Ken Ham, as head of NASA.

Teabagger darling and smuggest Senator alive, Ted Cruz, promises he'll remake NASA and science to his and his religious supporters' liking.

 

Snooze Cruz

The talk of this past week is all about Texas junior Senator Ted Cruz’s 21 hour filibuster (or filibluster) to oppose Obamacare. Jon Stewart humorously covered the filibuster fiasco quite nicely on the Daily Show. Ted Cruz is the perfect picture of today’s modern Republican Teabagger: smug, self-satisfied and completely clueless. Look at his pictures on the internet. Have you ever seen a smugger puss in your life?   Even Republicans aren’t fond of this guy. And this former Canadian has Presidential ambitions, too. We here at the Bucket have a solution. Why doesn’t Texas secede from the United States and Ted Cruz can be President of the new Lone Star Republic. It’s win-win for everybody. Texas becomes it’s own country with one of it’s own as it’s God-fearing, conservative leader and America gets rid of one seriously crazy, wack-a-doodle politician and the irritating state that gave us Dubya, Rick Perry and the most annoying slogan of all time, “Don’t Mess With Texas”.

Texas Senator and Tea Party darling, Ted Cruz, impresses some admiring Teabaggers with his compassionate words of wisdom.

Jan. 6th: Treason Day

January 6th marks the one year anniversary of the Capitol riots, or Treason Day as we’re calling it here at the Bucket, and like we mentioned in a previous post, many of the instigators like Paul Gosar, Ted Cruz, Josh Hawley and Marjorie Taylor Greene are still roaming free and haven’t been brought to justice or even expelled from Congress. And the biggest culprit, TFG, is still blabbing and squawking about non-existent election fraud on his cross country tour including an upcoming appearance here in Arizona. Attorney General Merrick Garland, who sure seems to be taking his sweet time, assured America that his office will continue to pursue those responsible and that “the actions we have taken thus far will not be our last.” We certainly hope so because up to now, we haven’t been particularly impressed with Mr. Garland or his Department of Justice.

We’re reposting our photo-toon from our November post because it pretty much says it all. The facts surrounding Treason Day are undisputable. The investigation’s federal prosecutors have charged more than 700 people related to the attack, with new criminal cases introduced every week. Many of the accused have military backgrounds and are relatively young. About a quarter of those charged are accused of physical violence. But like we’ve said before, this was an attempted coup to overthrow a legitimate election with almost zero voter fraud, no matter how much the Republicans claim there was! This was a dress rehearsal. If we don’t punish those responsible, the next time . . . and there will be next time, the rioters will be successful and America will cease to be a democracy!

Despite overwhelming evidence that the Jan. 6th riot was an attempted coup, the Republicans continue to gaslight the American people by saying that it was just a nice, friendly tourist visit.
Despite overwhelming evidence that the Jan. 6th riot was an attempted coup, the Republicans continue to gaslight the American people by saying that it was just a nice, friendly tourist visit.

The Cuckoo Coup

We’re baaaaacccckkkk . . . well, kinda . . . sorta. It’s been seven months since our last post here at the Bucket and no, we don’t have COVID. We’re fully vaccinated and we still wear masks when we go to stores or enclosed spaces. So, where have we been? Like we mentioned in our last post, we’ve had the blahs – a feeling of languishing that was primarily caused by four years of non-stop chaos courtesy of TFG – (like many, we can’t say #45’s name anymore – we hate the man that much) – and the morally bankrupt fascist Republicans. But mostly we’ve been chillaxing; observing and trying to fathom some of the insanity that is happening, not only in this country, but in the world. For instance, we can’t figure out why people won’t get vaccinated against a deadly disease like COVID-19 which has killed over 5 million people worldwide and over 700,000 in the US. And governments like the US are trying to stop the spread by issuing mask mandates and offering the vaccine free of charge. But people are rioting against the life-saving measure and sometimes killing others in the process – madness; complete madness. Prominent conservative right wing anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers have even died from COVID complications which could have been prevented if they had just gotten the vaccine. And somehow athletes and former reality show hosts know more than doctors do about microbiology. Sheer insanity.

There has been an avalanche of worrisome events that have occurred over the summer and we can’t comment on all that has happened in just one post. Joe Biden and most of the Democrats have delivered on their promises for making the vaccine widely available and trying to control the pandemic. They’re restored ties and relations with our allies and improved our standing on the world stage again. They’ve also delivered on the infrastructure bill despite sabotage from a couple DINOs: West Virginia’s Coal Lovin’ Joe Manchin and Arizona’s own Miss Cutesy-Pie Bait and Switcher Krysten Sinema (we’ll comment more on these specimens later). All in all, the Democrats have accomplished a lot in the last eight months, not that the media has given them much credit. Despite the Democrats performing well, we’ve seen disturbing developments from the corporate main stream media that reminds us of when Obama got elected. The Democrats swept into power but yet the ‘liberal’ media focused on the Republicans, which allowed for the rise of the Teabagger movement, which morphed into the MAGA cult. For instance, Biden correctly withdrew from Afghanistan but the Taliban took back the country. The corporate media portrayed this as Biden’s fault completely forgetting the last twenty years of our disastrous involvement in this country where empires go to die. Well, we don’t have short memories here at the Bucket. The fault lies with George W. Bush for getting tangled up in the quagmire to begin with. We’ve got much more commentary on this subject matter later, too.

But what really has us worried is that few people have been reprimanded for the Jan. 6th capitol riots. Honestly, folks – we’re students of history here and this smells just like other fascist attacks in history like in Italy and Germany in the 1920s and 1930s and Chile in the 1980s. Using terminology from Naomi Klein’s book, The Shock Doctrine, the Republicans are implementing shock and awe on their own country. And to make matters worse, it seems to be working. The top story in the supposedly liberal media every night should be about reprimanding all the assailants of the Capitol and all their enablers in Congress. Why haven’t we seen Ted Cruz and Josh Hawley expelled yet? Why are Paul Gosar, Andy Biggs, Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert still serving? They openly aided and abetted the insurrection. The media should be grilling them over this. But instead they just repeat the Republican’s weak, disturbing attempt at gaslighting saying the the riot was nothing more than an friendly tour of the Capitol. We’ve seen the pictures, morons! This was an attempted coup to overthrow a legitimate election with almost zero voter fraud, no matter how much the Republicans claim there was! Fortunately, more evidence that TFG and other congressional Republicans instigated and were behind the coup. Democrats are advising democracy loving Americans to be patient, but time is running out, folks. According to some sources, the Republicans incredulously are primed to take back the House and the Senate in 2022. If that happens, democracy will be dead because the Republican absolutely will resume tearing apart this government and forcing their fascist, corporatist and religious agendas down every American’s throat.

Despite overwhelming evidence that the Jan. 6th riot was an attempted coup, the Republicans continue to gaslight the American people by saying that it was just a nice, friendly tourist visit.
Despite overwhelming evidence that the Jan. 6th riot was an attempted coup, the Republicans continue to gaslight the American people by saying that it was just a nice, friendly tourist visit.

The New GOP Pinhead Clown

The fallout from the January 6th Capitol riots is still taking place as more and more citizen rioters have been rounded up. The QAnon shaman guy even did a TV interview and the guy who put his feet up in Nancy Pelosi’s office, whose nickname is ‘Bigo’, is complaining that he’s getting unfair treatment. Oh, boo hoo! That’s called punishment for trying to take over the government. It’s the law and order that conservative Republicans declare they want; you know, break the law – go to jail.

But that ‘Bigo’ guy does have a point. Why have none of his co-conspirators in Congress been brought to justice yet? The Republicans in the House and Senate voted to let Trump off the hook. Are the Democrats are willing to let Republicans like Ted Cruz, Josh Hawley and Tommy Tuberville off the hook, too? It’s true federal investigators have started examining communique between the rioters and U.S. lawmakers. But despite overwhelming video and audio evidence, nothing has been done yet. Hawley is especially appalling since he gave the rioters a big fist up on that January 6th morning, which caused one of his earliest supporters to regret his decision. But what is it about this Senator that makes him so annoying?

Well, it appears that Hawley wants to be the new Trump and is trying to position himself so he can win over Trump’s supporters for a possible Presidential bid in 2024. On January 6th, Hawley, Ted Cruz and Tommy Tuberville opening questioned the legitimacy of the 2020 election right before the riots occurred thus fanning the flames for the insurrectionists. As a result, his favorability has plummeted and he is viewed as a pariah. Sidenote: It’s funny that Republicans are crying now that Democrats need to show unity in the Senate when all the Republicans had to do to promote unity was accept the election results. The hypocrisy runs deep with the GOP.

Now that Merrick Garland has been confirmed he has promised that investigation into the Capitol riot will be given top priority. So maybe, just maybe, justice will be coming soon for the instigators like the new, GOP pinhead traitor clown Josh Hawley. We think treason would be an appropriate charge for this up and coming Republican doofus.

There's a new pinhead in the GOP circus named Josh Hawley and he's the Trumpiest clown of them all.
There’s a new pinhead in the GOP circus named Josh Hawley and he’s the Trumpiest clown of them all.

Coward Of The Country

Ted Cruz. Just saying the name brings a mixture of laughter and revulsion that is hard to describe. Over the past decade, he has cemented his status as the most hated American politician and yet . . . he’s still in Congress, just like other contemptible Republicans Lindsay Graham, Mitch McConnell, Thom Tillis, Susan Collins, etc…. But Ted Cruz, who started out as a Teabagger darling, is especially slimy. We’ve made many photo-toons about Cruz’s reprehensibility over the years but his recent actions have only reinforced his status.

Take his part in the Capitol riots on January 6th. He purposefully lent legitimacy to unfounded claims of voter fraud with fellow GOP corporate lackeys Josh Hawley and Tommy Tuberville (sounds like a kid’s show clown) opposing the legal election of Joe Biden. Then during Trump’s second impeachment trial, these seditionists voted that the petulant man child was innocent despite a 57-43 verdict and Mitch McConnell stating that the orange-haired megalomaniac was certainly responsible for inciting the riot. But Cruz is culpable. He could have promoted unity but instead insisted with his election fraud shenanigans thus egging on the easily triggered Trump troglodytes.

Cruz’s cowardice isn’t surprising considering that he opening ridiculed Trump in the 2016 presidential campaign, performed a 180 and smooched his gargantuan ass when he got the nomination despite Trump calling his wife ugly and saying his dad helped kill JFK.

But Cruz took his vileness to new levels in the past week. Texas suffered one of its worst winter storms on record with temperatures in the normally balmy state dipping down into single digits and snow accumulating across the entire state. Not only that, the power went out because the gas and coal plants weren’t weatherized properly, so people had to deal with rolling blackouts. Some even had to burn furniture or live in their cars. But Ted Cruz had a great solution . . . at least for him. Instead of showing leadership to his constituents, he did the very Republican thing of saying let them eat cake and flew off with his family to Cancun. Wow! The stupidity of this action is enormously stunning! What makes it even more damning for Cruz is that Alexandrea Ocasio-Cortez, who isn’t even from Texas, managed to not only raise millions of dollars for victims but also flew down and helped out. Way to go AOC!

Yes, Ted Cruz has proven himself to be many things; Senator, sycophant, seditionist, traitor and coward. Which begs the question – how and why the hell is he still in Congress?

Ted Cruz: Senator, sycophant, seditionist, traitor, coward.
Ted Cruz: Senator, sycophant, seditionist, traitor, coward.

GOP: The Party Of Moral Hypocrisy

With the special election for the Alabama senator coming up next Tuesday, the Republicans are walking back their earlier condemnations of Roy Moore and are now throwing their full support behind him. America’s CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump, said “We don’t want to have a liberal Democrat in Alabama, believe me.” Oh yes…we’d much rather have a sexual predator.  Mitch McConnell, a.k.a. Turtle Boy, who previously condemned Moore, now states, in typical Turtle Boy form, that he’s going to let Alabamans make the choice. And of course, Lyin’ Ted Cruz, who previously withdrawn support for Moore, has now said he’ll work with Moore if he’s elected while hypocritically saying that Al Franken, who has also allegedly done some groping of women, (though not teenagers), should resign as Senator. Alabama conservative, evangelical, christian Republicans are also fully supportive of Moore, one church even comparing Moore to Jesus. Who knew that Jesus liked to sexually harass teenage girls.

But unfortunately, Alabama is a deep red state and it certainly looks like Moore will probably win. And people wonder why no one wants to visit Alabama.

American CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump and his GOP cohorts, Turtle Boy Mitch McConnell and Lyin' Ted Cruz endorse teenage girl aficionado, Roy Moore, while claiming moral superiority.

American CEO/Dictator, Donald Trump and his morally superior GOP cohorts, Turtle Boy Mitch McConnell and Lyin’ Ted Cruz enthusiastically endorse teenage girl aficionado, Roy Moore, while condemning Democratic Senator Al Franken.

New Republican Health Plan: Just Die Already!

As expected, one of the first actions of the new Trump administration and the GOP controlled Congress is to repeal the Affordable Care Act, a.k.a. Obamacare. This despite the fact that the ACA has helped millions to afford healthcare and repealing it would eliminate insurance coverage for an estimated 32 million people. Everyone agrees the ACA is not perfect, but it is a great first step to something better, the ideal being a single payer health care system and eliminating the health insurance companies completely.  In short, the ACA is working. Not only that, the Republicans have NOTHING to replace it.

But that won’t stop the Republicans from trying to repeal it…because…you know…Obama likes it.  It’s amazing, but there are some people who want to get rid of Obamacare and keep the ACA, not realizing that they are the same thing. Jimmy Kimmel proved this recently on a segment on his show. What does this show? It shows that the Republican Propaganda Machine, a.k.a. Fox News and the right wing media like Breitbart, Rush Limbaugh et al, have been enormously effective at disseminating false news and deceiving the American public. That and a lot of Americans are lacking in the ability to think critically. Want proof? Look who’s President now!

American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and his GOP lackeys, Lyin' Ted Cruz, Mitch 'Turtle Boy' McConnell and Paul 'Jug Ears' Ryan have come up with a new health plan for all the sickos out there.

American CEO/Dictator Donald Trump and his GOP lackeys, Lyin’ Ted Cruz, Mitch ‘Turtle Boy’ McConnell and Paul ‘Jug Ears’ Ryan have come up with ‘the best’ new health plan for all the sickos out there.