SKYMart's Item O' The Week
What’s more fun than perusing those in-flight shopping magazines and seeing fun products that everyone needs like ping pong ball cannons,
solar powered face fans for your dog, and your very own life-size bronze sculpture of Simon Cowell…all on sale at exorbitant prices? Not much
if you ask us. That’s why we’re teaming with SKYMart, America’s favorite in-flight crap merchant shopping mart, to bring you the Item O’ The Week.
This week’s item is sure to be a people pleaser, so break out your credit cards and prepare yourself for debilitating debt!
| ProTekShun Laser-Armed Guard Owl |
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From the leader in high tech Home Security, comes the latest trendy gizmo to protect your home: the Laser-Armed Guard Owl. This deadly owl detects motion, sounds an audible alert and blasts away with powerful, high energy, chemical, oxygen iodine, laser beams from its watchful eyes. This cutting edge technology is available only in military weapons and our owl. It will slice through skin in seconds leaving anybody who dares to bother you in excruciating pain. Send a message to all the scumbags in your neighborhood like the paperboy, that Jehovah's Witness who comes by every week to convert you and sweet old Mrs. Applebee and her decadent, fat producing chocolate cream puffs. Guarantee privacy and security for yourself with the new Laser-Armed Guard Owl, from your friend in high tech Home Security, ProTekShun.
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