Cactus Corners Singles Adventure Club Calendar

The Cactus Corners Singles Adventure Club is a singles club for adventure seeking individuals in the Cactus Corners area. The BilgeBucket Gazette's own Dex Rexter, is a member of this fun loving group and has agreed to post upcoming events in an effort to boost membership. Meetings occur every other Friday at the Pink Gecko Karaoke Lounge in the Cactus Blossoms Strip Mall. Here are the exciting events planned for the coming weeks.

	Tuesday, April 12 - Relive Your Childhood Trauma night. Everyone will meet at Cactus Corners Skatetown to relive those glorious junior high years when your first case of puppy love dumped you in front of everybody at the skating rink. Psychiatrist Dr. Wayne Giabotti, who once met Dr. Phil, will be dishing out coping advice.
	Thursday, April 14 - Video Night at Dale Carlson’s house. We’ll be watching the cinema classic, Behind the Green Door starring Marilyn Chambers. Free bananas, popsicles, cucumbers, and carrots for all females.
	Friday, April 15 - Harlequin Romance Night at Betty Noble’s house. Instead of going out dancing we’ll settle in and read passages from The Australian Tycoon’s Proposal by Margaret Way. Bring your chocolate, Hagen Daz, and heaving bosoms.
	Sunday, April 17 - Thin the Herd Hike planned at Rattler’s Canyon in the Buzzard Mountains southwest of Gila Bend. This remote, isolated area, miles from the nearest hospital, is noted for it’s abundance of poisonous critters like the Western Diamondback rattlesnake, the Gila Monster, the bark scorpion and numerous other exciting, deadly animals. Be sure to wear as little clothing as possible because it will be plenty hot out. Don’t worry about water, either. Our fifty year old map says there’s a small stream in the canyon.
	Tuesday, April 19 - Macramé Night at Karen Lorkovic’s house. That popular pastime from the ‘70s is making a comeback. Make a hat, belt or oh so fashionable sweater. And despite rumors to the contrary, guys who like macramé aren’t gay. Come one, come all. Karen will supply the needles, yarn and vodka.
	Thursday, April 21 - Skateboard Night at Cactus Corners Mall Skatepark. Beulah Snodgrass will demonstrate proper skateboarding techniques including ollies, kick-flips and frontside 180s.
	Saturday, April 23 - Cruising for hookers on Van Buren Street in Phoenix. We’ll all pile into Frank Brinkman’s pickup and tour all the sleazy dives in search of the best pooty-tang in town. If Sheriff Joe catches you, we don’t know you.